Mood swings

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Thought I'd write this down while I'm feeling somewhat sane...

I get very angry about this whole Aspergers Syndrome malarkey and the effect it has had on my life. I have no one to talk to about it, so instead I listen to music loudly through headphones, smash things, cut myself, over-eat, and over do it on sleeping pills and pain killers.

That seems to have gone out of my system for this evening though and I am much more relaxed. I'd say I feel like the above probably two thirds of the time, but I do switch between moods pretty much instantly.

Sounds rough. I feel for you.

I've listened to music on very loud and would bang my hands or things on walls and countertops (broke a cutting board once). The banging/breaking hands/things was usually when I was drunk. I think I liked the loud noise from it. The music seemed to match the underlying thoughts related to the foundational causes of the mood, though if you would have asked me at the time, I wouldn't have known it. However, my moods wouldn't switch instantly. Instead, this would happen late at night when everyone else was asleep and I have had a few drinks already. I lived alone, but the traffic outside had left and the neighbors (save one that was awesome) weren't outside to witness my meltdowns. I was going through a lot at the time. Walking/pacing for miles seemed to help a bit.

Oddly enough, while that period was very dark for me, I slightly kind of miss it for a moment because it felt good to get that out of my system. Bonus: I was sometimes surprised with a clean house, car, or laundry the next morning from the despair cleaning. Penalties: the hangovers were rough, taking out the recycling and thinking of my neighbors hearing what I was blasting at a 100 was embarrassing, especially since I would listen to the same stuff ever night or sometimes play concerning videos. I'm honestly surprised the cops weren't called to my house. :facepalm:

Have you talked to a psychiatrist about this OP The right psych med combo helps my moods a lot but it's a lot of trial & error.

Do you have ideas what coping mechanisms could be better for you? Taking a walk in nature sound like a better option than overeating or self-harm. Which sensations do you find soothing? Perhaps you could look into DBT, there are guides online.

Do you get angry with yourself about your diagnosis Steve

I think I get mood swings actually

It's like I can feel sad and in an instant I'm laughing but I think with me it's because it's really easy to make me laugh

Thanks for the replies.

No, I haven't spoken to a psychiatrist. Too expensive, and I'm not particularly confident in the medical profession any more. i did register with a GP recently. I would like to go and see if there is any help available in my area for people with AS, but from what I've read, local services seem mostly geared to "neurodiversity" rather than Aspergers Syndrome.

I've had some very long walks this week which to be honest, have helped (did 13 miles yesterday and 20 miles the day before), but carrying a bag made my shoulders hurt and I haven't slept well, so it hasn't helped as much as it could.



I get angry about the diagnosis. It was done in such a way that I felt like I was walking around with a big sign about my head saying "Disabled" or similar. My own family don't even see me as a person. They see me as an Aspergers Syndrome diagnosis. Not to mention the effect it has on jobs/education etc.

I could see how taking walks in nature, diaphragmatic breathing, and all of the coping skills can help calm someone down in the moment. However, I think that suppresses the processing of related natural feelings. Sometimes, it seems helpful to engage in them and play them out to process them so that they aren't buried along with the rest. I'm not advocating for self-harm. That's obviously not healthy. I'm more so saying finding a way to process them cohesively. If someone is angry, they can blast angry music and go for an angry walk. If they are sad, they can go lay in a dark room, play sad music, and cry it out. In this manner, the emotions are no longer an issue afterward. Otherwise, they stay buried and still impact how we perceive and behave even if we aren't consciously aware of it.

I don't think deep breathing has ever helped me. Neither did meditation

Walking and physical activity help process emotions, however

For self-harm there are lots of recommendations such as squeezing ice cubes or stress balls

And other stims

Crying is also a gold natural way to process feelings

Whatever floats your boat

(Sorry for my bad writing, I'm worn out today)

Same! Deep breathing and meditation don't seem to help me like it's supposed to. Deep breathing can help me if someone does it with me because I am forced to do it and they are giving the instructions. If I'm doing it alone, I wont want to start. If I do start, then I'm more worried about doing it right and all that. It doesn't help process emotions, just subdue them for the moment. Meditation is my practicing coping skills to limit stimming and trying my hardest to focus on what I'm supposed to focus, while I keep getting distracted by the millions of other things to think about.

Walking and physical activity are the best! I love pacing. Also, when I was training for endurance competitions, if something upsetting happened, I would save it for my next training event. By the end of the training, I would have been done with it.

Oddly, I used to cry by myself every few months when I was home alone. It hasn't happened in a really lone time though :/

I don't think deep breathing does anything to my emotions at all. Or very little if it does.

Stimming is healthy and helps neurodivergent people self-regulate.

I don't see the point in all this breathing stuff that people always recommend for anxiety.

Yeah I had a manager at work who thought breathing was the answer to all life's problems

I've been in therapy for nearly 3 years and not once has he suggested breathing

He probably knows I'd tell him to stick it up his jumper

I think you're actually doing better than you know Steve

Keep talking mate