For the Men Who Still Don’t Get It.

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Also Fnord this post comes off as "White-Knighting"(or how I see people use the term). It comes off like that cause it's random and not in a thread that was pertaining to such issues, it mentions things that women could have brought up themselves if needed, and since you are a male you never had to actually experience any of these issues personally so it ends up losing it's credibility.

I'm not saying it's bad, and I like that you care but, since you aren't a woman this thread doesn't really affect you in anyway. It's like getting into an argument you had no business being apart of to begin with.

Ok, I have mixed feelings about this thread. Normally I wouldn't touch this with a ten foot barge pole and I'm replying outside my better judgement.

Perhaps it's that it taps into a general feeling I've grown tired of seeing in love and dating and the haven.
I would love to ignore them, but there is a tipping point where it becomes a normal/established part of the sites culture and influences or causes conflict in the other sub forums.

What if
I give up on being heard by men and rely on the Male voices of reason to calmly back up my point of view.

What if
I'm glad to have male peers who actually get it.

What if
Men are so used to being advocated for that they take female peer support for them as a standard way of being and have no heed on its significance

What if
I become so jaded that I stop advocating equally for both men and women, and focus just on women.

Can see how it happens.

I believe the purpose of the thread is educational, to have men think about things women deal with that they don't think about because they are not living as a woman. IMHO the examples have been realistic and varied.

I don't know why this thread is in the women's section as it would seem to me women do not need to be educated about life as a woman.

GiantHockeyFan's going somewhat off topic is very typical of what regularly happens on threads here. It is far from the most egregious example of this. That said in a perfect world a separate thread of instances where common male disadvantages are discussed would also be a good idea. Unfortunately the misogynists, the incels, the tone deaf have hijacked that topic to the point that any guy bringing this issue up will be assumed or suspected to be using this topic to deflect from his misogyny.

I'd be interested in reading a separate thread of men's issues that got me thinking how they might feel about things that would never normally occur to me.

I found topic valuable to me. It touched me deeply. I'm having trouble articulating this...validates the demeaning experiences of my life as unfair. Add it to being autistic and not understanding what was going on....as I consider this....the experiences may be more damaging than bullying.

I contributed to this thread because I think it has value, not to demean men or to say that men "don't get It". I didn't choose the title for the thread and, ideally, I would prefer it had a different title pertaining to point of view, empathy, or understanding between genders instead of implying men are insensitive or unaware. Regardless, I think the individual What If statements are truthful without being sexist. Of course many of the points pertain to biology, and it isn't men's fault that they can't menstruate or bear children. In contrast it isn't women's fault either. Women didn't ask to have these biological phenomena, no more than men asked to avoid them. Biology is what it is, but it's OK to consider those differences.

I think it's useful for men to take a moment and reflect on women's experiences, not to shame men or cause a gender divide, but to appreciate and consider the extra burdens which women carry. This is not a gender war. I have great respect for men and empathy for the pressures they bear in society as well. If someone would like to use this topic as a springboard for an equivalent men's list, then please do. Improved empathy between men and women would help us all.

I don't get why most people haven't even mentioned the post on what GiantHockeyFan said. He's obviously been through a horrible time and he needs to be acknowledged too, and his experiences shouldn't be discounted just because he is a man.

What If

-Shakespeare or Dickens were compelled to use female pen names, to be published or taken seriously?
-The works of male writers were, historically, discredited as heretical or insane?
-You tried to publish a tome of writing, but received this rejection from a female critic:

"There is a danger of which I would, with all kindness and all earnestness, warn you. The day dreams in which you habitually indulge are likely to induce a distempered state of mind, and in proportion as all the ordinary uses of the world seem to you flat and unprofitable, you will be unfitted for them without becoming fitted for anything else. Literature cannot be the business of a man's life, and it ought not to be. The more he is engaged in his proper domestic duties, the less leisure will he have for it even as an accomplishment and a recreation."
(Based on Robert Southey to Charlotte Brontë)

-Reviews of your best-selling novel became condescending, when critics discovered you were a man?

What If
as the only man in the meeting
you were expected
to serve the tea
keep your mouth shut
and clean up afterward

What If
your tears
were dismissed
as manipulative
by women

What If
you had to dress for summer
in winter
just to be noticed
by women