What do you struggle with most day to day?
Since my flood:
Having heat in the house, but no water (5 nights)
Having cold water, but no hot water (2 nights)
Having all water but no heat in the house (3 nights)
Having all water and temporary heat, but no laundry (4 nights)
Having no power in the house (1 night)
Having strangers in my house to fix things (12 days)
On a musical-chairs basis. ^
Every day has a new delight.
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funeralxempire
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Age: 39
Gender: Non-binary
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Location: Right over your left shoulder
I'm pretty sure most of my struggles can be lumped together under the headings 'deficit of executive function' and 'mood disorder'.
The way the former plays out day-to-day:
short attention span
intrusive thoughts
fixation
difficulty maintaining focus on complex tasks, instead getting distracted by the elements of them or the planning required to complete the task
endless knight's move thinking
being prone to constant daydreaming unless a situation involves an immediate existential threat and only responding to threats of that nature due to being frustrated over their intrusion
constant need for stimulation to maintain focus
procrastination
difficulty considering approaches that involve receiving help from others, i don't ask for help and rarely even conceive of it being an option for me even if i also understand that it both should be and is an option for others
prone to misplacing things, forgetting things, having routines breakdown very quickly, ritualizing elements of tasks without ever considering if that element is no longer needed
struggling to make use of strategies and tools for offsetting some of those weaknesses (I had a whiteboard, never really used it and then lost it as an example.)
As for the latter:
cycling between depressive, manic and mixed states makes it difficult to accomplish most mundane day-to-day tasks either because i have no interest in living and thus can't justify the effort in building the infrastructure to support long-term living, or because I'm too distracted by grandiose ideas that typically involve either far more work and effort than I tend to be capable of, planning on a level that I am unlikely to be able to follow through on or social networking that exceeds my abilities, or some combination of those three, or that I'm recovering from being exhausted after the last bout of that
apathy/detachment
prone to black-out rage
vindictive nature
combative, combative without concern for the opponent's place in any relevant hierarchies
the constant sense that i shouldn't exist
anxiety
poor emotional regulation
i fail to form emotional bonds with people
i struggle to interact with people without the underlying assumption that they'd prefer to have the interaction over with as quickly as possible
everything becomes a debate all the time
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Being patient with myself and others.
Asking for help.
Not automatically leaping to the worst case scenario.
Believing that everyone is doing the best they can, me included.
Taking time to relax, and not feeling guilty about it.
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How has the current pandemic changed day-to-day challenges?
Personally, I sense that the 'stay at home' and 'social distancing' directives are like a two-sided coin - that is I'm meeting important, and necessary challenges readily. Yet, I still sense some of the familiar struggles.
I forget to eat a lot, and I struggle with time management. I also struggle with making myself leave the apartment to go do things, including grocery shopping.
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nick007
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Another thing I struggle with is not yelling/snapping at my girlfriend. She gets anxious & upset very easily & takes things out on me that have nothing to do with me & I struggle with biting my tongue. I feel I get stressed out & angry very easily & I wanna snap/yell at Cass when she starts freaking out or getting upset over something. I started seeing a psychiatrist & he prescribed a new med that I'm gonna start taking in a couple nights so hopefully that'll help.
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dragonsanddemons
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Joined: 19 Mar 2011
Gender: Non-binary
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Location: The Labyrinth of Leviathan
Personally, I sense that the 'stay at home' and 'social distancing' directives are like a two-sided coin - that is I'm meeting important, and necessary challenges readily. Yet, I still sense some of the familiar struggles.
It hasn't really changed anything for me since I don't have a job and can't drive in an area where pretty much my only option for public transportation is Uber and the like ($$$). Really the only difference is that we're not occasionally going out to restaurants like usual, though we sometimes get takeout now.
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Yet in my new wildness and freedom I almost welcome the bitterness of alienage. For although nepenthe has calmed me, I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men.
-H. P. Lovecraft, "The Outsider"
dragonsanddemons
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Sensory issues are a big one for me, mostly sound and touch.
Showers are a sensory nightmare for me and I don't enjoy baths, either. As a result, I often put them off for longer than I should.
Frequent shutdowns, especially when in public places like restaurants or grocery stores (though it's not as bad as it used to be before I got my service dog).
Selective mutism.
On the other hand, I also have trouble keeping from gushing about my special interest(s) that no one I'm talking to shares, or sometimes even have heard of.
When interacting with multiple people, usually the others get into a good discussion and I just fade into the background. If I try to contribute, they just let me talk and then carry on as if I hadn't said anything. I call this "social invisibility" - I'm visible enough that people don't walk into me or anything, but otherwise I may as well not be there - I'm kind of like a potted plant or something.
Major memory issues. I forget a whole lot of things, it's so bad that I can be actively watching a show or movie and forget what's on during commercial breaks. Also misremembering and "remembering" things that didn't actually happen. I really can't trust my memory for much of anything these days. And I have the unfortunate habit of forgetting that I forget everything, so I don't bother writing things down or anything.
If left to my own devices, I don't eat.
Chronic insomnia, which means I'm almost constantly tired (withiut meds I'm lucky to get half an hour of sleep and often get none. Even with meds I sometimes get none, like the night before last. I probably get around 6 hours of sleep a night with several wakings.)
I have trouble recognizing that I have to pee until it's an emergency.
And as of two months or so ago, lots of dizziness, lightheadedness, muscle weakness in my arms and legs, frequent muscle twitches, and occasionally things that might be seizures, all because my iron level is extremely low (I just got the first of two iron infusions today (if my iron was one point lower, they would've given me a blood transfusion ), then we're going to wait two weeks to see how I'm doing and try to determine why it's so low, and still decreasing after I started taking iron supplements).
Procrastination is also an issue for me.
Essential tremor makes it very difficult and frustrating to do anything that requires precision.
Extremely passive, letting others make most decisions and doing everything I can to avoid upsetting people at all (though I think I sometimes do that simply by existing), trouble making choices myself, can't make any decisions that will affect anyone more than just me.
Second (and third, and fourth, etc.) guessing myself.
Perfectionism (but only for myself, not for others)
Comparing myself to others and beating myself up over what a failure I am.
Feeling completely worthless.
That's all I can think of right now, though I'm probably forgetting something(s). Gosh, I'm a mess
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Yet in my new wildness and freedom I almost welcome the bitterness of alienage. For although nepenthe has calmed me, I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men.
-H. P. Lovecraft, "The Outsider"
I have a list of daily hardships:
1. Sleep apnea keeps me tired all the time.
2. Bad knees, so I have trouble and pain getting around.
3. Getting to the toilet on time. I use disposable undies, so they help with this issue.
4. Having to spend a lot of time on the toilet. When I want to get up I find I still feel like I have to poop again, so I have to stay awhile till I poop again, then I feel like I have to poop yet again, and so on, and so on, etc. until I can finally escape from the bathroom.
5. Other health issues that make it difficult to get chores done, so they tend to pile up. Just had a paid cleaner in here last week, to help out. I have her in every few months.
6. Executive Function Disorder. I am very disorganized.
7. Some of my allergies cause terrible phlegm issues, which cause me to cough a lot to clear out my wind pipe. I used to treat it with just menthol cough drops, which helped a little, but several years ago the problem got worse, so I started taking an over-the-counter allergy med to help with it, and it did, but lately I've been having a real flareup of excess phlegm, so a couple of days ago I started taking the allergy med more often, and that's helping more now. I still take the menthol cough drops too, to help boost the effect of the med when it's starting to wear off.
There's other problems, but these are the main ones.
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