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Hoax friends

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KitLily
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03 Aug 2022, 3:42 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
I have read that it's really common when someone either is not interested or loses interest will make plans just so they don't hurt he person's feelings and then bail at the last minute.


Yes, this has happened to me many times, so I'm very aware of when it's happening again :(

Summer_Twilight wrote:
2. I have talked about the mother and the autistic daughter in another post. Anyway, I associated with them and they were fake friends.
A. The autistic daughter would love bomb me one minute and then the next she would cut me down the next
B. Both of them invited me to their home one minute and told me they loved having me around and then the next they said I did things that bothered them. :roll:
C. The autistic daughter started trying to break up my other friendships by telling them things about me that were not true.


Those sound more like narcissists than autistic people.


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Fnord
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03 Aug 2022, 3:45 pm

The false friends I have encountered were all nice to me until I turned down their requests for monetary loans.



Summer_Twilight
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03 Aug 2022, 3:55 pm

Kitlily:

I think they are too in regards to narcissism. However, the daughter has an official autism diagnosis as well as other underlying conditions. Though she is my age, she is very immature and very mean.

My other friend, who had the birthday confronted her by asking why she gossips about other people. According to my friend, she knew that we were referring to me. She told him not to be my friend anymore because I accusing her of lying. He told her to stop talking about me and shut up.



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 8:14 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
Kitlily:

I think they are too in regards to narcissism. However, the daughter has an official autism diagnosis as well as other underlying conditions. Though she is my age, she is very immature and very mean.

My other friend, who had the birthday confronted her by asking why she gossips about other people. According to my friend, she knew that we were referring to me. She told him not to be my friend anymore because I accusing her of lying. He told her to stop talking about me and shut up.


I find it hard to tell who is autistic and who is narcissistic sometimes. Like my in laws, who could be either or both.

Sounds like you've got one good friend to stand up for you! :D


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KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 8:15 am

Fnord wrote:
The false friends I have encountered were all nice to me until I turned down their requests for monetary loans.


I haven't had that experience yet but good for you standing up to them! What a cheek to ask for money!


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TwilightPrincess
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04 Aug 2022, 8:18 am

I had a hoax friend offer me money a while back. 8O



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 8:22 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
I had a hoax friend offer me money a while back. 8O


Why did they do that?


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TwilightPrincess
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04 Aug 2022, 8:30 am

KitLily wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
I had a hoax friend offer me money a while back. 8O


Why did they do that?


It’s complicated, but I think he was trying to manipulate me into having a sexual relationship. I learned that he did the same thing with at least one other person.



Fnord
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04 Aug 2022, 8:30 am

KitLily wrote:
Fnord wrote:
The false friends I have encountered were all nice to me until I turned down their requests for monetary loans.
I haven't had that experience yet but good for you standing up to them! What a cheek to ask for money!
The worst part was putting up with their sycophancy, and knowing that it was all a sham.  I mean, when they start describing me with treacly superlatives, I know right away what they are leading up to -- appealing to my ego is a huge warning sign that someone is trying to pull a fast one on me.



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 8:33 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
KitLily wrote:
Why did they do that?


It’s complicated, but I think he was trying to manipulate me into having a sexual relationship. I learned that he did the same thing with at least one other person.


Eww! What a creep! I'm glad you escaped him.


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Fnord
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04 Aug 2022, 8:34 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
KitLily wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
I had a hoax friend offer me money a while back.
Why did they do that?
It’s complicated, but I think he was trying to manipulate me into having a sexual relationship. I learned that he did the same thing with at least one other person.
Sadly, there are a lot of creeps out there who believe that giving gifts to women (i.e., cash, dates, flowers, jewelry, et cetera) somehow obligates those women to have sex with them.



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 8:39 am

Fnord wrote:
The worst part was putting up with their sycophancy, and knowing that it was all a sham.  I mean, when they start describing me with treacly superlatives, I know right away what they are leading up to -- appealing to my ego is a huge warning sign that someone is trying to pull a fast one on me.


You're right, I only cottoned on to that about 10 years ago. People online were always flattering me and I just thought, oh that's nice, they must be my friend. No. They just wanted to manipulate me somehow, I'm not even sure. To make fun of me? Get secrets out of me? Live a fantasy life? God only knows.


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TwilightPrincess
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04 Aug 2022, 8:39 am

Fnord wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
KitLily wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
I had a hoax friend offer me money a while back.
Why did they do that?
It’s complicated, but I think he was trying to manipulate me into having a sexual relationship. I learned that he did the same thing with at least one other person.
Sadly, there are a lot of creeps out there who believe that giving gifts to women (i.e., cash, dates, flowers, jewelry, et cetera) somehow obligates those women to have sex with them.


I’m glad I didn’t accept money ($2,000) from this person. I was broke at the time, but I sold stuff instead which worked out.

Being vulnerable puts people at risk for being manipulated by creepy people.



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 8:40 am

Fnord wrote:
Sadly, there are a lot of creeps out there who believe that giving gifts to women (i.e., cash, dates, flowers, jewelry, et cetera) somehow obligates those women to have sex with them.


Yes, it's yet another thing we have to be careful of.

Luckily, men have always run a mile from me so I never had to cope with that sort of thing.


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kraftiekortie
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04 Aug 2022, 8:42 am

Your husband didn’t :)



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 8:42 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
I’m glad I didn’t accept money ($2,000) from this person. I was broke at the time, but I sold stuff instead which worked out.

Being vulnerable puts people at risk for being manipulated by creepy people.


Yes and people wonder why everyone puts on a tough front. It's to discourage the creeps.


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