Things About YOU That You Attribute to Aspeger's

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i was non verbal til age 8 but couldnt speak articulately til age 12

never had meltdowns though but had zero sense of danger so i had to be watched all the time except when asleep

i have meltdowns as an adult and savant skills at driving and memorising routes

Find some of the autism channels on YouTube and see what they describe that resonates with you, especially in list videos.

Some of my key points...

Trying to be a little adult and little professor as a child. Too well-behaved and mature for my age. Difficulty interacting with children.

Overanalyzing social interaction. Scripting, rehearsing, debriefing. Difficulty making friends throughout my life.

I love to read, but I have almost no interest in fiction.

Being criticized as a judgmental perfectionist.

Abnormally picky eating habits that didn't get better as I got older. Texture sensitivity. Disliking smells that people normally find pleasing.

Hyperfocus. Intensity that makes other people slightly uneasy. Overexplaining. Attention to detail to the point it becomes more stressful than useful.

Overly organized and almost obsessive about order and balance. Overly practical and rational.

Alien Syndrome. Feeling non-human.

obsessive need to have books and other stuff neatly arranged and organised
(meltdown trigger if disarray]

finding some things difficult what other people like for granted but being excellent at memorising routes and training new bus drivers on the bus despite social difficulties.some say i have a savant skill there

not interested in other people except my son and my husband

difficuly understanding feelings of my and others and not always able to express how im feeling

meltdowns can be bad and aggressive and so severe that i exhaust myself out and sleep for hours

masking socially at work to the point where i may have a meltdown sometimes at work if theres a change or sometimes when i get home due to mental exhaustion

happy in my autistic self but hardly laugh im very serious and no nonsense type of person but can act immature during a meltdown like laying on the floor

like/need routine and predictability

dont like loud noises

narcissism behaviours like enjoying admiring how beautiful i am
and not caring about others feelings.sorry .

unusual accent

when i was a child i didnt speak until i was 8 and not fully articulate until 11

unusual as a child even for an autistic.. meaning i never had any meltdowns back then and was a silent child

-executive dysfunction
-the "fish out of water" feeling I had in social situations for many years
-needing to do my work tasks in a certain order or getting highly irritable
-have a very small social battery
-getting socially burnt out and not wanting to see another person for days, weeks, or months
-sensory issues & meltdowns
-misphonia
-lack of eye contact
-getting extremely fixated on my interests, especially when I was younger

The first thing written in my report about autism was my total lack of eye contact. That was in 2004 and still applies now. I haven't really gotten any better at it even though I'm aware of it.

- Cognitive rigidity
- Need for 100% predictability and sameness in job.
- Very deep attachment to places and old things. ( this might not sound like an Aspie thing but I realise that my strong preference/need for sameness influences this a lot)

About myself and about Aspergers?

My damnable personality isn't as truly aspie-ish. It's worse than that.

My inclinations and preferences are aspie-like and most of those traits are like symptoms that I have to deal as a human, whether this is something I can and cannot do, know and do not know.

The mentality and intentions doesn't match and is more autistic than merely an aspie.

Things I have to deal as a human also includes a personality that behaves and reacts not congruent to my beliefs, my idea and ideal self, and my intentions -- which is even worse than merely dealing with autism symptoms itself.



For now the only trait that aligns with myself -- not necessarily the personality -- and my autism is the asociality and whatever made me a nonconformist.

The rest is an unrelatable mess that is being a damnable human.


If one has the comprehension to read beyond what I posted -- yes, so much of the splitting is from whatever crap of a reaction that has nothing to do with autism.

Until and until then when my damnable ego is done, I may not stop this form of fragmentation and progress.
Frankly, the only thing that seem to keep me more "grounded" and put together despite this -- is whatever autism does to the sense of self itself and perception that accepts that unacceptable, which just taps beyond the damnable ego...

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Whooo....that is alot of things that could attribute to it,, big one is Naivete.
but this will be short and you can infer based on this little one thing, that comparitively all my stuff can be ecplained by it . simple, I put my shirt on inside out yet again after all these years ...And did not realize it for hours after going out and my friend pointed it out yesterday . Then figured it was too late and did not change it, my day was close to being over and would be taking it off as soon as I was home. This type of stuff has been prevalent most of my life and can imagine this little discrepancy ,extends into many aspects of my life . But some can be attributed to on going fatigue issues as well . But at least it is consistent in my life..lololzz

Low sense of self and difficulties in grouping others into identities.

But it is maybe me.

My picky eating habits
My inability to deal with anger and disappointment
My obsessions
My hyper-focus on certain things (right now it's getting married and becoming famous)
My problems interpreting social cues

I find it impossible to discern what is ASD and what is ADHDI.
Perhaps only the feeling uncomfortable with eye contact thing?
And not liking change?
And they consider me ASD2?

Maybe.
I feel crazy today like ASD is a sham.

Here are a few.

-I used to be socially unaware, to the point that when I think about things I said or did in the past, I feel like I must have been drunk for the first 19 years of my life in order to make those decisions.

-I develop very strong obsessions. They can be helpful and allow me to master a topic very quickly, but I can prioritize these obsessions over things that should be more urgent. But when I study something that I really love like a language or an academic field, people always say that I'm better than anyone they've ever met at that topic.

-My parents used to tell me constantly that I was too literal minded.

-I have very little interest in developing friendships with my coworkers, and I think their social events are boring unless I drink. I also feel like it's not worth being friends with them, because they constantly make unwise decisions and cause trouble for themselves, and I don't want to help them deal with the problems they cause.

-I have a strong set of morals on which I don't like to compromise. I also attribute more value to the outcome of someone's actions than their intentions, which is apparently an aspie thing. For example, I think an incompetent person who accidentally harms those around them is just as bad as a malicious person who harms on purpose, because the incompetent person should recognize their shortcomings and let someone take over their responsibilities.