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Easy targets to make fun of?

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SkinnyElephant
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22 Jul 2023, 7:09 pm

babybird wrote:
naturalplastic wrote:
babybird wrote:
What do you mean by wide berth


A "berth" can mean a space between adjacent piers into which you park sea going ships.

So the expression "giving a wide berth" means "creating space". Usually you hear the expression when person A doesnt like person B and tells you that "I give person B a wiiiide berth!" to avoid dealing with them.

With the post above I guess it just means you walk in a way that you create phycical distance between you other folks in the hallway.


Oh I used to know someone who did this. It was as if he would rather walk into traffic in order to avoid getting too close to people. He also was so shy that he never spoke. I liked him.


Right, that's what I meant by berth (keeping your distance).

For some, it could be social phobia. In my case, I have a hard time judging distance. I give a wide berth so I don't accidentally brush against or run into someone.



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23 Jul 2023, 10:00 am

IsabellaLinton wrote:
My neighbour once said that she could tell my daughter was my daughter by the way we walk. It freaked me out a) to think a neighbour watches us and knows how we walk when we aren't even together - enough to know we were related, and b) that our walk is different enough to stand out. I know I'm stiff and wooden so I guess that means my daughter is too but I don't see it in her. Someone once told me I move like I didn't take the clothes hanger out of my shirt.


Yes that is a bit of a weird thing for a neighbour to say, however I have noticed that people say things like that because they think we will like it. They think we will say 'awww...my daughter is just like me, how cute.'

My mum said I walk exactly like my dad but I've no idea what that means or the similarity. Especially as he died 40 years ago so I've no way of checking! :P


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babybird
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23 Jul 2023, 2:20 pm

Well I walk with a limp


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Deinonychus
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09 Aug 2023, 10:42 am

Even when I've been cooped up for soooo many years, people online still humiliate me and make fun of me for being socially stupid.

You know the funny thing? It's that I keep thinking it's going to be okay, that I keep thinking in good faith and that I'm still not suspicious enough.

As if I never learn from my mistakes.

My self-esteem, on the other hand, is taking a big hit.

Sometimes I really miss my childhood, when I couldn't understand what was being humiliated.
Now I realize that, but it's far too late now.



rse92
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09 Aug 2023, 11:55 am

Checkbox wrote:
Even when I've been cooped up for soooo many years, people online still humiliate me and make fun of me for being socially stupid.

You know the funny thing? It's that I keep thinking it's going to be okay, that I keep thinking in good faith and that I'm still not suspicious enough.

As if I never learn from my mistakes.

My self-esteem, on the other hand, is taking a big hit.

Sometimes I really miss my childhood, when I couldn't understand what was being humiliated.
Now I realize that, but it's far too late now.


Why don't you stay offline?

Most people's mental health would improve if they spent less time or no time on line.



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09 Aug 2023, 12:27 pm

rse92 wrote:

Why don't you stay offline?

Most people's mental health would improve if they spent less time or no time on line.


I don’t stay offline because I don’t have any friends.
I don’t have a job and have severe depression so it is hard to find friends.

But you’re right. I grew up with the Internet like all people of my generation (35 years old) and it is not always good.
We all need offline friends and real support.

I have tried group social skills programs offered by shrinks with no success. People already knew each other and I didn't manage to fit in.



KitLily
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09 Aug 2023, 2:09 pm

Checkbox wrote:
We all need offline friends and real support.


that sums up the problem of the world now doesn't it. Everyone is too busy online to support each other in real life :?


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09 Aug 2023, 2:26 pm

KitLily wrote:
that sums up the problem of the world now doesn't it. Everyone is too busy online to support each other in real life :?



I don't really know, it depends on the people. Maybe.

For my personal case, I was alone long before I was online and before others were online. I certainly did my mid-late teenage years with the Internet, but I was not born with it.
Internet is probably an aggravating element in my situation but it is not the cause.
The cause is me and how I failed at social life: bullies that have ruined my schooling are only a consequence and Internet my answer to that.
The problem with Internet is just that people can afford horrible things a lot more because of being hidden behind their screens and let the relationships be disengaged.



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13 Aug 2023, 5:59 am

theboogieman wrote:
babybird wrote:
I always find myself in a protective role with people on the spectrum when it comes to this.

Same thing here. I went to school with a very kind but naive girl who is absolutely autistic (though she's never told me this). She was incapable of telling when she was being patronized, and that was incredibly frequently. People loved to put her in situations where she thought she was finally being included or praised when it was all mocking.

I definitely told people to back off a few times despite not being an assertive person. It broke my heart because these same people who mocked her for her differences were always virtue signaling by being friendly to the higher support needs autistics and down syndrome people in the special needs program.

Not autistic enough to be pitied, too autistic to be accepted. I hope she's being treated better these days.


I hate being mocked and ridiculed for being different. The endless pain of having Aspergers. Having Aspergers makes me an easy target to be mocked, ridiculed or taken advantage of by others.



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13 Aug 2023, 7:18 am

Checkbox wrote:
KitLily wrote:
that sums up the problem of the world now doesn't it. Everyone is too busy online to support each other in real life :?



I don't really know, it depends on the people. Maybe.

For my personal case, I was alone long before I was online and before others were online. I certainly did my mid-late teenage years with the Internet, but I was not born with it.
Internet is probably an aggravating element in my situation but it is not the cause.
The cause is me and how I failed at social life: bullies that have ruined my schooling are only a consequence and Internet my answer to that.
The problem with Internet is just that people can afford horrible things a lot more because of being hidden behind their screens and let the relationships be disengaged.


Sorry to hear that :(

Before the internet came along, I had quite a lot of friends. I think they saw me as a weirdo but it didn't stop them being friends with me. I also had quite a lot of support and a social life.

As the internet took over our lives, my friends drifted away. It just seems too obvious to me to be a coincidence.


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13 Aug 2023, 2:44 pm

I had no idea how disliked I was at prep school till the last meal of the last day there. Yes I'd been teased a bit, but nothing major as far as I was concerned . I took a swig of my tea not knowing someone had put tobacco in with the tea. The nausea was horrendous . It was a cruel thing to do.



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13 Aug 2023, 2:45 pm

Checkbox wrote:
KitLily wrote:
that sums up the problem of the world now doesn't it. Everyone is too busy online to support each other in real life :?



I don't really know, it depends on the people. Maybe.

For my personal case, I was alone long before I was online and before others were online. I certainly did my mid-late teenage years with the Internet, but I was not born with it.
Internet is probably an aggravating element in my situation but it is not the cause.
The cause is me and how I failed at social life: bullies that have ruined my schooling are only a consequence and Internet my answer to that.
The problem with Internet is just that people can afford horrible things a lot more because of being hidden behind their screens and let the relationships be disengaged.


I'm a few years younger than you.

While my family got a computer when I was in elementary school, I didn't use the internet extensively until the summer between middle school and high school.

I belonged to an online group for teens worldwide during high school. I was able to make friends online to take my mind off the fact I had few to no friends in person.



SkinnyElephant
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13 Aug 2023, 2:47 pm

firemonkey wrote:
I had no idea how disliked I was at prep school till the last meal of the last day there. Yes I'd been teased a bit, but nothing major as far as I was concerned . I took a swig of my tea not knowing someone had put tobacco in with the tea. The nausea was horrendous . It was a cruel thing to do.


It's amazing how our haters manage to hide their true colors until school is over.

The summer after high school, I got a social media message from a classmate I didn't think held any ill will toward me. She said "I think you're sketchy and gross."



KitLily
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14 Aug 2023, 11:51 am

That makes me feel better actually. I never got the feeling I was hated at school, no one did anything like that to me. I was just invisible. I'm good at being invisible.


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14 Aug 2023, 12:22 pm

^^^ Yeah that does sound alittle creepy that someone watches you and your family members that closely .
And many people with disabilities do walk alittle bit stiffly, it would be expected. :roll:
I have had much rehabilitions on relearning to walk a few times in my life, usually due to results of serious physical injury ... And have seen many older peeps with a stiff gait. :|


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14 Aug 2023, 1:34 pm

I have my chosen family who I see regularly. There are no friends. Social media is better than watching TV all day, or vegetating in bed.