How respond to implied "lower rank" in casual chats?
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I'd better let you get on
I also use this, yeah, but we are native speakers, I'd put the language factor in here.
Each European country has it's own flavour of English and here it's pretty direct and literal.
For this person I have had very positive interactions otherwise, so i am comfortable to dismiss it,
but it doesn't change my view that broadly there is this insidious hierarchy thing.
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Taken literally, there's little difference between that and "you're dismissed,"
I would contest this. The word "dismiss" is only used from a context of higher to lower status role-power, and while
"I had better let you go" has some elements of power since you are doing the letting, the "had better" part
is used when you should do something that you are being lazy about - "i had better fix that", this places a small amount of
blame on the speaker, suggesting they are overstepping themselves by continuing the interaction. There is a lot of very British
context here, but the presence of that part adds a very different spin to the expression than the curt "you are dismissed."
Oh wow this seemed so rude until you spoke to the person again and got clarification. Interesting.
I ramble in real life conversation so I say something similar but I use more words. I'll say something like, "I'm sorry! I'm running my mouth and I'm sure you're busy." Then if the other person wants to talk further they can say something like, "Oh no it's okay," and say something else. If they do want to end the conversation they can say something like, "It was good talking to you I'll see you later."
__Elijahahahaho wrote:
Quote:
Taken literally, there's little difference between that and "you're dismissed,"
I would contest this. The word "dismiss" is only used from a context of higher to lower status role-power, and while
"I had better let you go" has some elements of power since you are doing the letting, the "had better" part
is used when you should do something that you are being lazy about - "i had better fix that", this places a small amount of
blame on the speaker, suggesting they are overstepping themselves by continuing the interaction. There is a lot of very British
context here, but the presence of that part adds a very different spin to the expression than the curt "you are dismissed."
OK, how about "Taken literally, and with complete disregard of context, I personally see little difference between that and "you're dismissed." ?
Myself, I'd be convinced somebody was joking (or perhaps insane) if they told me I was dismissed, and I wouldn't feel offended at all. It's so military, or reminiscent of a Victorian schoolteacher that I just couldn't take it seriously. But then deep down I'm probably still living in the late 1960s when we young egalitarian rebels thought we'd taken over the world.
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I'd be convinced somebody was joking
Yeah... you are living in a different culture than this one.
Someone asked if I was mentally ret*d to my face, because I expressed the opinion
that cold weather can be beautiful and this area was interesting to move to.
And it wasn't a joke. The tone was all there, with a pleasant smile, they even followed up with a "are you sure?".
I have faced property damage, and commonly people - instead of telling me to go away, keep jabbing with increasingly passive
aggressive quips, as like a game(I think?). The issue is from the workplace toxicity and the abusive alcoholic parents...
all leftover from Soviet times.