Currently looking at Parasympathetic Dominance.
Because it somehow fits a bit.
Especially while working.
Could explain why a lot of things about me works backwards.
Because there's so much about downregulating the Sympathetic Nervous System, related to stress and anxiety -- when I have something else instead and no amount of relaxation works.
Might be why I don't have a lot of problems relaxing.
... Because being relax is never the answer?
Maybe why my sense of fear is screwed, why I have less nervous moments compared to the norm?
Maybe why most at the time, I don't 'feel like it'?
Maybe this is why I eat a lot? Or, don't because I feel full too often.
Maybe this is why I walk a lot? Or, inconsistently, I have days that I just don't go out.
Heck, maybe this is why I eat and walk a lot. And why I also sleep and let myself not eat or drink outside the context of super focus and autistic inertia.
Might be why my perspective on anxiety is mostly amplification and feeling more alive than the classically associated fear and panic?
Because that's how overactive sympathetic nervous system usually works -- which isn't my case.
Maybe this might be the very reason why I can't relate what amounts to basically 90% of autistics and their living experiences?
Maybe this is how I have issues transitioning from one task into another?
Maybe why some of my executive dysfunction issues feel like it's my body instead of just my head?
Maybe it can explain my out of place 'novelty seeking' trait?
... Maybe it's the root cause of my chronic rhinits? To a point that I have to dehydrate myself at some point because of how disruptive it is?
... Maybe this is why I have complicated 'needs' and is the reason why I was forced to track and mind whaveter's within me because of how unpredictable this body is?