pokeystinker wrote:
All I see is a lifetime of unhappiness.
Understandable. It doesn't sound like you do much to create happiness, although when someone's in your state it's hard to expect them to do much towards that goal.
That said (and speaking from experience) you still need to take responsibility for what you choose to do or to not do. Baby steps towards improving your life are better than no effort whatsoever towards that goal. Sitting around moping or seething won't make things better, but actively challenging those ways of thinking can, signing up to do things can, trying new things can, etc.
For me, signing up for hockey helped create purpose. Yes, it's pretty trivial at the end of the day but that's okay. It's at least something and it's better than being too scared to sign up because of my lack of experience. I still suck, but I suck significantly less than when I first started.
_________________
The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.
You can't advance to the next level without stomping on a few Koopas.