thelonelywarrior wrote:
One of things that i dislike most about being bisexual and attracted to men is how it seems to only be about sex. All the gay dating apps i have used is filled with people looking only to hook up. Then even on the profiles that say they are looking for friends get a look at you and your not their type they ignore you. So what happen to taking time and getting to know someone before jumping into bed or why does sex have to be any part of it at all?
This is the part i hate very much about the gay.
The other is at least the people i have run across usually on the same apps as the people looking just to hook up are couples looking for side fun. Like does monogamy mean nothing in the gay world and the married and couples who do this why did we as gay community fight so hard for gay marriage if we're not going to honor it the same way as a straight couple? What's the point of me saying I'm going to love honor and cherish someone for the rest of my life if on Saturday and going out and having sex with another partner? Is there such a thing as gay monogamy?
Because the thing I want most and in the gay world is he committed loving partner someone who is as committed to me as I am to him. Regardless of bedroom performances it's not about sex but it's about love and commitment that we have for each other. I want one straight married couple I know has commitment to each other I mean that particular relationship the man has had his prostate removed so alone time isn't happening anymore and she had a stroke and forgot it's important parts of a relationship and yet they're still together and still love each other. Does that not exist in the gay world? When neither one is looking outside of the relationship they are satisfied with each other in the relationship they have Concepts in my own Meandering through the gay world seem to almost be lost on most gay people. Why is it we is gay people prefer sex Above All Else?
I think you can easily say that promiscuity in the straight social sphere is just as strong than the gay one. However, the gay men and women that make up the gay "community" is far smaller than their straight counterparts, aside from men who do not identify with being gay and have sex with men for whatever reason. This can mean that gay people have less of an opportunity over who to meet. I don't think that all gay men and women are looking for sex. However, I will say this, which doesn't apply only to LGBTs but does help explain some of the obsession with sexualisation.
The LGBT community are still far behind the times. LGBT organisations only seem interested in creating a society that is more accepting of LGBTs because they assume that they key issue among LGBTs is coming out. While I think this is a significant issue, I think there are other problems at play that LGBT organisations ignore or simply do not tackle (depression among LGBTs, greater likelihood of loneliness, greater forms of addiction among LGBTs and so on).
In general, I think sex in general is too often conflated with pornography which has implanted itself on many people's minds by conditioning many to expect the things represented in it are "sex", indeed the idealised forms of sex even though it is a complete fiction. It's not to say most people are unaware of that but they still make that mistake of conflated sex as that. In doing so, they develop unhealthy expectations and detach sex from any sort of emotional intimacy which happens to correlate with highly narcissistic attitudes. People who are LGBT suffer from more mental illness, social isolation or loneliness (less close friends) insecurities and substance abuse issues. Therefore, their tendency to be more vulnerable state can result in them carrying alot of trauma from being victimised and results in some pursuing very shallow but also narcissistic and compete with one another in terms of looks and so on. As a result, some in the LGBT community can be very cliquey. This means they are not welcoming to others within the LGBT world, which can surface in the form of ageism, transphobia, sexism and racism. As a result, the LGBT world is, I think, more internally fragmented and divided than it seems outside of the online world where LGBT people's definition of solidarity consists of mostly young LGBT people posting photogenic pictures of themselves looking pretty.
02 Aug 2022, 10:32 am
That IS an option! Obvi many in the gay community do in fact exercise that option, too.. hence the reputation for there being so much sex in the gay world. It isn't necessarily a bad thing.. I mean, it's sex, which can be absolutely wonderful. Apps and hookups aren't for everyone I suppose, but.. the whole realm can be pretty hot for those who choose to partake. Just sayin'.
for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
