school problems + hearing voices questions

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My 12 year old son has, since he was able to talk (coherently around age 6) told me that he hears voices of people who aren't there. He hears people call his name and currently hears a male voice in the house giving military commands. He says it happens rarely, so... I've never been too worried. Only once or twice have I seen him "answer" to someone who calls his name.

The reason this is coming up as an issue is that this was his first year in school (grade 6) after being homeschooled his whole life. He is very smart (scores in the 90th+ %tile on standardized tests) but doesn't usually do well in crowds of people so homeschooling seemed like an ideal solution for him. This year he wanted to try school so he took the plunge. He really seemed to flourish in his own quirky way, until suddenly this April he abruptly started refusing to go to school and would literally be curled up in a fetal position hysterically crying. I told him that if it was disturbing him that much to go to school he could homeschool again but that he needed to explain to me what was going on.

After refusing to disclose anything he finally claimed that he was being bullied by 6 kids in his class and that it had been ongoing for 5 or 6 weeks. This seemed strange to me as 5 weeks earlier he had been perfectly fine (and I asked all the time if anyone was giving him a hard time). He made a list of the names and what they had said and done. I brought it to the principal and she did an investigation.

Here's the thing though-- no corroboration was found for the claims. A couple of the kids he accused are decent kids so even I was surprised over my son's claims. The teachers saw nothing, his friends saw nothing, his sisters saw nothing. He claimed he was being constantly harassed and verbally abused.

So either 1) it all did happen but the kids were sneaky enough to evade detection; 2) it happened a little bit but he exaggerated to get out of school (but I had told him all along he could homeschool again if he wanted to, so there was no need to lie); 3) he was hearing voices insulting and mocking him at school (maybe triggered by stress?).

This has put us in a delicate situation of having all these kids accused of wrongdoing when they might not be guilty. Meanwhile my son has refused to go back to school and we had to beg and plead with him just to go in after hours (with no kids there) to take his finals (so at least he'll get a report card, which I don't care about but the school is pressuring us).

Any thoughts?

I would believe your son over the six kids if it were me. Kids, especially those that are NT know how to be very deceptive. My son has had some of the same problems. The teacher believes some of his classmates are little angels, when they are anything but. Finally we got some evidence - my son just made a Facebook a few days ago, and the little worms contacted him on it and said all sorts of insults, profanity, etc. School is out now, but at the beginning of the next school year in August, we are going to the teacher and principal and presenting hard copy evidence of what they said to him.

As deceptive as kids can be, eventually they slip up. Some are actually little Eddie Haskells when they are around adults, teachers, parents, but when they get in the group, they are terrors. They are like a pack of ravenous wolves.

Believe your son.

I completely agree with the previous poster. Even kids who seem like they are the really nice and good kids can be very deceptive. I was completely picked on in school, especially junior high school. I remember how the favorites of the teachers, the ones who seemed like leaders, were actually some of the cruelest kids. It was extremely hard emotionally. I work in the school setting now and hear the same things. Teachers tend to believe the leadership, well liked kids over the ones who seem to get in trouble all the time. A lot of times it isn't the one who is labeled as having problems of some kind. Those children are just no as good as hiding it. They haven't figured out that "social" thing yet and may never will.

How old is your son? Have you and he talked to a qualified professional about the voices? Does he seem paranoid? Lets say he is hearing voices, it doesn't mean that the bullying didn't happen. Let's say that he is paranoid and it really didn't happen, it is still his reality and probably affects him greatly. It is unlikely, though that he is just hearing voices and imagining everything only in this instance. If he is having those episodes, it would most likely occur in more than one setting and be quite significant.

I wonder if he is saying that about other kids because he is fearful of the variety of situations he encounters daily. He probably has great anxiety which may really interfere with his daily educational functioning.

If he has great school phobia, the district should consider a different placement with less social stress to help him through this. This is typically a classroom for children that have emotional disabilities but label shouldn't dictate placement. Unfortunately for many school districts, the label does dictate placement but legally school districts can't do that. I would first see if the school district has anything like that. If so, they need to consider that for your son since he is exhibiting great school phobia. A child that is refusing to go to school due to great anxiety would qualify as having school phobia. If he is on an IEP, they do need to consider it. If he isn't on an IEP, then they need to do an evaluation due to school phobia. I would first contact the school and see if they have an option for a different setting. If they say it can be considered, then talk to your son and see if his stress tends to lessen.

You and he are really going through a lot, regardless.

There is another option which you may be overlooking. It is possible that the other children have offended your son unintentionally.

For example, when I was in school I had a friend who completely sucked at math, but did well at English and literature. I was always the opposite. I did fine in math and science, but discussing poetry was horribly boring for me, and I failed at writing good essays. We had a bit of a running joke. Whenever he complained about math I would always say 'wow it must suck to be so stupid'. And whenever I complained about English he would say 'wow, it must suck to be so close-minded'. It was just in jest, as a way of reminding each other to stop complaining so much. Of course the problem is that if this can also be perceived as a very mean insult if the person doesnt know your joking.

Likewise, your son's classmates may be saying something in jest, not intending to offend your son, but thats how your child takes it. He may just be too sensitive to criticism, and takes comments the wrong way.

Of course the other possibility is that the other children are indeed jerks who are good at hiding their actions. This to me seems just as possible, if not more likely the your son misinterpreting what they say.

It could also be a combination of both. They may be making jokes at your son's expense, typical of the hazing amongst 6th grade boys, and your son is overly sensitive and takes it much harder then an average child would.

Of course the solution in all 3 situations is to go back to home schooling, and wait till your son has developed a thicker skin. Perhaps you could try structured after school activities with other children as a way to get your son more interaction, and toughen up a bit without plunging him into full time schooling (which is very unsupervised and prone to bullying, despite what the teachers say). I dont know much about your son but maybe something like martial arts classes could teach him a bit more self confidence, while also letting him be around other kids. Anyways, talk it over with your son and see if you can come up with any ideas.


As for hearing voices: It is possible that he is simply hearing his own internal voice, but not recognizing it as such. When most people think, they hear themselves talking in their heads. This is called your own internal voice. Of course people are not born with their internal voice, because they simply dont know what language is at birth. Generally people start hearing their own internal voice around the time when they start speaking, so 9-18 months. As such, most people can never remember a time before they had their voice in their head.

People with autism however, usually think more in pictures, and generally dont hear this internal voice until much later then normal, if at all. This is more common amongst those who had a delay in speech. So your son may have gotten to age 5 without ever hearing his own internal voice. Then when he heard it for the first time, it seemed vary odd to him, since it wasn't something he grew up with like a normal person would. And of course being autistic, this internal voice doesnt talk very often, so its not something he is used to. Ask him if he can control what the voice says, or what it sounds like. If he can control the voice, then its just his own internal thought process that he hasn't quite gotten used to yet.

Of course the other possibility is that this is indeed an auditory hallucination. I dont really have any advice in this manner, but I wouldnt start panicking about it if it doesnt present any really problems. While it may be associated with mental illness, it is not always the case. I wouldnt declare your son insane and put him on drugs if there no immediate problems being presented. I did find this interesting link that you might like to take a look at:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hearing_Voices_Movement

Perhaps check out the link at the bottom of the page and see if anything looks useful.

Wow. Great information Tracker. You have always been extremely insightful. I didn't even think about those other reasons. This will certainly help me out personally and professionally as well. Thanks!