Tony Attwood

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I have just been to a lecture by Tony Attwood in Denmark. It was a 2 days lecture, and the first day was REALLY great. But the second day was bad, and with a lot of prejudice against the males with AS. So I was wondering why he travels the world and teaches everyone about AS, when a person with AS could do it better than him? I know I could do a better job, because I can explain the things better and I have more insight. I know a lot of AS people are psychology professors, so why are they not making lectures about AS?

The numbers he showed: 98% of women who are with an AS man have worse psychological health and 92% said they had worse physical health compared to when they were single. And he made it sound like that an AS man is some the worst kind of person you can be in a relationship with. Maybe we are?

I wonder how those numbers were obtained. Did he say? I'm also curious about what women with men in the general population would report.

I went to his seminar in Bellingham, WA last year. His new book is about how AS is presented differently in females and how AS research was skewed by not learning how that presentation is shown.

Also he had a long part about working with the women in the audience that loved AS men. (he had them give a show of hands as to who among them loved AS men) They had a good long chat about all the 'endearing' traits of their AS men.

I wonder if it was the same lecture. Sounds like it.

That's the guy who's supposedly our friend. Makes me appreciate my enemies.

You get to be a celebrity by telling the audience what they want to hear. He's fully aware that nobody in the "mental health" profession is going to have a problem from demonizing heterosexual males, and if they're aspies, nobody's gonna care about them.

If he was saying the same kind of stuff about homosexuals or women, he'd be flipping burgers at MacDonalds next week, but as long as he's making life worse for heterosexual aspie males and their children, he's not only safe, he's famous.

If he lived in Alabama a hundred years ago, he'd be going around telling black people how much he admires and respects them, then he'd go to a Ku Klux Klan meeting and tell them they need to lynch more n****rs because n****rs aren't capable of acting civilized.

But hell, he's getting away with it. Like P.T. Barnum said, there's a sucker born every minute.

Both my partner and I are AS and extremely satisfied with our relationship.

If there is truth to higher divorce rates or unhealthier relationships, maybe it's more down to autistic men not finding the RIGHT kind of mates. Any marriage is bound to be an unhappy one if the partners are mismatched. I mean, if auties have a tendency to not date so much, that considerably lowers their options when choosing a mate, increasing the likelihood they'll partner off with someone who isn't a good match for them. Or, also, if auties are perhaps poorer at wisely choosing a mate too.

My father (an aspie) and my mother (eccentric to an extent but not autistic) were a poor match for each other. Not that they didn't love each other, but when it comes down to it we auties tend to have a different communicating style and good communication is VITAL to a healthy partnership. And my parents didn't really understand each other. My dad was very logical, my mother, while certainly level-headed, is definitely more the intuitive creative sort. But the problems in their marriage were down to both of them, because NEITHER of them knew how to effectively communicate with the other and they were both at fault for having chosen unwisely. Thankfully for me, otherwise I wouldn't be here.

I have read matter where Tony claimed in writing what the OP commented on, I think that Tony is a good person but this could be a weakness. He made some comments in a book but never backed it up with a citation to a trustworthy reference.

For instance the openng section of the chapter on "long term relationships" starts with

"From my clinical experence, and the research of Maxine Aston"

He fails to give a citation as to what exactly he found during his clinical expereince. Sadly to the best of my knowlege nobody was standing over him documenting everything he has ever done. I think he needs to provide a more concrete record, also I have difficulty with the work of Maxine. Maxine has written a series of books but to the best of my understanding she has never written up her work in a peer reviewed journal.

I was recently reading a review by Albert Ghiorso of the deeds of one self taught scientist who went somewhat wrong (David Hahn the "Radioactive Boy Scout"). He commented that David is likely to have made some mistakes, which would have been avoided if he had been able to discuss his work with others in his field. Through a discussion of the project, the ideas and the first results a large number of pitfalls could have been avoided.

The peer review system might have a lot of flaws but it is an important way in which the research is discussed by your peers. It is also an important quaility control system.

Maxine has failed to publish her work in the serious peer reviewed literature which has handicapped our ability to look at the work in a critical way. Maxine may have discussed her work with others but as it has never passed peer review it is difficult to know if she did or not. My own experience of peer review is that oftein the journal will send back my first version of the paper with some comments which have then improved the quaility of the final work.

I think that Maxine could do better work if she subjected her ideas to proper and strong peer review before publication.

I think that Tony Attwood could do better if he choose his sources differently and wrote up in some concrete way his findings.

See http://pubs.acs.org/cen/books/8232/8232books.html for Albert Ghiorso's comments

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Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Sadly, very rarely do practicing clinicians bother to publish. The main reason being, they don't use the scientific method to come to their conclusions most often. Usually, it's personal experience and intuition. Which isn't really the type of thing one publishes in a peer-reviewed journal. Though they seem to be able to get away with it in books...

If the 90-something percent figures came from Maxine Aston's patients, of course they'd be high. That's the kind of people she attracts as patients. Women who actually wanted to communicate with their male Aspie spouses wouldn't seek out marriage counseling from someone who so obviously blames everything on the Asperger's. It's like surveying the KKK for opinions on interracial marriage.

I went to a similar talk up in Brisbane. I didn't find it objectionable at all, nor did I find it as anti-AS men and relationships as is implied in various parts of this thread. Nor did the majority in attendance.

got a problem? email the guy. Let him know. ask him to clarify his position and i think the issue may be explained in less black and white terms.

yawn.......

Have to agree with millie. I attended a recent seminar in Sydney during March. Tony and Isabelle revealed information about AS which was relevant to me and thoroughly interesting. Some of the information Tony gave 'Hit home' with my personality and it was uncomfortable to hear, but very true.

The seminar was too long for me found it difficult to concentrate although I was interest in the information. There were are few 'bitter' women in the audience who spouted some nasty and mocking remarks about AS males.

Thanks for all the cool reply's!

It just irritates me a lot, that I can't find a single person who is an expert in AS. I was really exsited when Tony Attwood came to Denmark, because I thought that he knew a lot about it. But no, he is just like everyone in Denmark who works with people who has AS, they treat them like they were children, and they see the diagnosis not the person. Is there anyone out there who knows how an AS thinks and has a respect the people having AS.

And is Tony Attwoods book the best book out there?

This is stupid! Why aren't there any AS people who study AS?