I want to travel, but I have reservations…

Post Reply New Topic

So I haven’t done much traveling in my life and I want to change that. I’m a big fan of the show “No Reservations” and its anti-tourist, authentic, “do as the locals do” philosophy. I totally want that kind of life-changing experience.

Problem is, travel has always caused me anxiety. A lot has to do with it being socially intensive - I don’t like using public transportation, or eating by myself in public, just being out of my familiar comfort zone wears me out. Then, some of it has to do with lack of knowledge – how to navigate the airport, who gets tipped what. All the logistics seem overwhelming.

I couldn’t travel by myself but don’t have anyone to go with. I might enjoy some group package deal where the itinerary/meals are all planned out, but don’t know how to find what’s available (and I guess those tend to be real tourist-ey anyway.) Any advice for me?

I am an airline employee and travel a lot. As an Aspie/Autie you need to give yourself plenty of time to travel don't try to do things on a tight time line. Also buy food at a local grocery store and eat in your hotel room, this will give you a more authentic experience like you want and avoids eating in public alone. Umm let's see. Take a sleeping pill if you go on a long trip on an airline or train so you can sleep and avoid social interaction. Make your first trip kind of short in case you freak out.

Anthony Bourdain has been a source of inspiration to me since I read his book kitchen confidential. I can't help but approve of his honesty about seeking an experience and knowing what kind of experience he wants.

That out of the way, don't get ahead of yourself because you know you want to experience something and experience too much of it too fast. Don't just start with a short trip, start with a really short trip. If you've never left your house, you start by going to another house. Bourdain didn't start out willing to eat anything, he started out eating whatever his sister would not so he could gross her out. Identify what is your current comfort level, and find something interesting to do one step beyond that and get used to coping with larger amounts of change at once as time goes on.

I like mikemmlj's suggestions. I recently took a trip to New Zealand and got to practice driving on the wrong side of the road for a while. It was the first time I have been overseas since I was in the military decades ago. The book I liked best was Lets Go New Zealand, it was easier for me too read through than the Fodors Guide but you might like Fodors better. I didn't have an itenerary because I didn't want to be stuck seeing 10 things in 9 days. I drove where I wanted when I wanted to.

Here is a picture of Lake Taupo, lots of other beautiful stuff to see, just get up and go.

Well firstly, definately go through with the traveling; I waffled with the idea for a while before finally taking a trip out on my own, and it's worth the experience. I didn't go far though, just halfway into the next state, but got to see everything I set out for.

I only took trains and busses, so I have no idea how to use an airport. But I did most of my eating at the hotel room (make sure they've got a microwave and/or fridge, whatever you require before you book it!), only one night did I eat solo at a Chinese Resturant. Also, make sure you have a full understanding of distances involved in going between where you arrive and where you're going (may not matter if you're taking a taxi).

My biggest disaster during my trip was when I took a bus to Jim Thorpe, PA. and got dropped off in the middle of town around 4:30 PM during the autumn, and had an internet map showing my motel outside of town (was $50 cheaper per night than any in town), so I thought I could walk there with no trouble, it was just a few miles. Turns out it was allll uphill, so I had my little suitcase with wheels thing and a full heavy backback, hiking uphill in a 3-foot shoulder off a relatively heavily trafficed road. An hour and a half had passed, the sun was getting very low in the sky, and I took my GPS unit out and discovered I was less than halfway to my motel!! I was so exhausted... so I ended up embarassed, had to call home and get my brother to look up phone numbers for hotels in town (I never thought to use 411 or anything like that) and made an expensive reservation, and hiked all the way down the hill again into town in what became complete darkness, checked into my room and the next morning I thought my legs were going to fall off they hurt so bad.

So yeah, don't make a mistake like that.

I'm sorry, but when I first read the title I read "reservations" as in, like, "hotel reservations" and began wondering why the desire to travel and actually having hotel reservations was a problem...

They want to travel Anthony Bourdain style though. You do so without reservation, you try not to eat at tourist restaurants and sleep in tourist hotels, you try and experience what life is like to a native, not the pretty show they put on for the tourism cash.

Package tours tend to be very touristy indeed, and are rather awful for someone who does not like social interaction - you're being forced to interact with random people.

I think the best way to travel is with a friend/partner/group of friends but if you do not have such available ... what to do? I don't really know.

There certainly is something a bit awkward about traveling alone, though I might enjoy it - I'm not sure. I guess it's hard to know unless you try.

As far as things like tipping - look them up on the Internet or in a guidebook first. This is something that varies enormously from country to country so having to figure this out is something all travelers face.

In a sense I think travel might be a "leveling" experience - since I feel like I am in a strange place even when I am home, actually being in a strange place is not so strange.

Well, if you decide not to travel, you should cancel your reservations...

Sorry, too good to pass up.

Thanks everyone, at least I’m having to confront these long-held ideas I have. And yes, the thread title was intended to be humorous, sorry if it confused you.

mikemmlj – Actually, grocery or hotel food doesn’t sound real appetizing. Eating good restaurant food would be one of the high points of travel for me. Hmm, do five star restaurants offer takeout? Guess not. Conversation on a plane doesn’t bother me either, it’s more asking for directions and things like that.

Crassus – I could do a car trip, no problem. I’ve done overnight trips for work but not for pleasure.

velodog – New Zealand sounds good someday, or Australia, at least I’d know the language. I think I’d want a mix of scheduled and unscheduled time, just so I don’t sit around and waste time.

LeonKrahe – You mentioned Jim Thorpe – I actually went on a “singles” rafting weekend near there, a number of years ago. That was kind of cool and lame at the same time. Nobody remotely made any romantic connections, but the people were nice. We did Dorney Park too. I would do something like that again, with a group of strangers if not singles.

dougn – Yeah, the info is out there if I take the time to research it. I guess the work must come before the fun.

Getting off the beaten path will introduce you to other people who are also a little eccentric and adventerous. I went on a group safari with three strangers and a tour guide. It was really fun. As long as I had my own space, food and hot water, I was happy. All were great and I enjoyed the company. "Group packages" sound kind of like a nightmare to me because the folks you will meet might be just your average tourists. It just depends on what type of "group" it is. A Lonely Planet guide might steer you in the right direction.

I've traveled kind of a lot in the past, and airports are pretty easy. Just figure out what your gate number is and what time your plane leaves and follow the signs, LOL. (And keep your ID/passport/ticket out because everyone will want to see them, and try not to forget them at a desk or something) If you get in the wrong line, you'll know soon enough, and if you get lost, it's REALLY easy to ask a question. Just go up to anyone who works there and ask "do you know where gate __ is?" and you'll get clear directions. Same with buses. Ask any bus driver what bus you need to take to get to ____ and they'll usually know. (Don't hesitate to ask a second or third time if the first one doesn't give you good info, though) it's a really simple interaction and will get you far.

Then there's the other kind of social interaction, which is probably more what you're talking about. People coming up and talking to you randomly, right? XD Yeah, this will happen, but it's best to not worry too much because if they come up to YOU, they'll usually be the ones doing most of the talking. If you just say a few words here and there, you can probably hear some really interesting stories, opinions and information from these people. I have grown to sort of enjoy it. Smiling a lot seems to help.

And as for eating out.. 5-star restaurants by yourself? Yeah, that sounds sort of awkward to do. D: Maybe if you ask if they have a small corner table on the balcony or something. Or you could bring a book. Or if you do find one that does take-out, you could take it to a park and eat there, that's always nice. How far are you going? Do you think there will be open-air markets with bread and cheese and fruit and stuff? XD If so, you can take THAT to a park too, and it won't be mundane like grocery store food.

Tipping.. just watch other people and see what they tip. I don't know about tipping either. Mostly, just try not to worry. It's really easy to travel. That's why college dropouts do it!