Adam Movie Discussion --SPOILERS!!--

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Spoiler Alert.......Click back if you don't want to see the spoilers!! !


Good grief, Adam doesn't end up with the girl? Depressing....Beth was all fine with going with him until Adam explained that he needed her rather than wanting her to come to CA because he loved her. Was this suppose to communicate that he wasn't capable of such a relationship (to love someone)....or did he simply lack the communication skills to say "I love you" even though his behavior reflected that he loved Beth......? Or did she realize that it wasn't a true bf/gf relationship and she was really going to be a caregiver.

By Adam thumbing through the childrens book at the end I don't understand how that is suppose to make me warm/fuzzy.

All and all I think it was a decent movie, I just didn't like the end.

Yeah, my ex saw the movie and he said exactly the same thing about it to me. It is like they are saying an aspie cannot fall in love and wants only a carer . (?!?)

you forgot 'Carol' the woman in the last scene that was gaga over Adam (Adam picked up on it by asking if he could help her carry some shipping boxes.) that was supposed to let us know that once he had a relationship with one woman, he now has learned the 'coupling' behaviours and can pick up on interest from other women.

I thought the ending was pretty realistic.

What I liked was the play between what might have seemed a distracting side story, Beth's father and his nefarious and inchaste ways. It made a big thing of Beth's mother saying she knew Beth's father was a liar and a marriage cheat, but she had 'compromised' and settled for that. When Beth's father said to Beth that 'she didn't have make that compromise for having a non typically neurological relationship I could see the pattern saying it is just as challenging to have someone lying to you as it is to have someone that will adhere to the truth all the time.

but I thought the most telling part of the movie was when Beth shouted at Adam "ASPERGER'S or NOT, you are a BABY!" and so we are. . .

by the way. If that is how neurotypicals see us, we look pretty sloppy out there.

Merle

Funnily, my father, the man with "mild" AS only desires a carer from his relationships; it kinda reminds me of the supposed "parasitic" lifestyle of sociopaths (one gets a bad stigma, where the other is all cute and fuzzy). A certain type of personality plus AS probably creates this.

I don't want anyone to care for me (interpersonally that is). It's what hospitals are for when life gets too much.

You are right. I think I was bummed that Beth and Adam were over that I wasn't excited about the box girl. Also, I took my mom/dad to the show. I am newly diagnosed and my mom was crying during the end. She usually doesn't ball over movies. I think she thought of me not ever having a relationship and no possibility of grandkids etc.

I liked the movie.

I didn't really think of the girl at the end as a potential romantic interest for Adam. Instead, it was to show how far he has come in the last year to empathizing with people after all the "training" he had with Beth back in New York. It's a contrast to the beginning in the movie when Beth was lugging her cart of heavy groceries up the steps, dropping heavy hints to Adam about how heavy they were, and him being oblivious to it. At the end in California, you see Adam take a pause, as if something clicked in his brain, then he asked the girl whether she needed help.

I thought it was pretty realistic, how it ended. I loved Hugh Dancy's acting. I could see all the emotions playing in his eyes (no blank stares there) as he struggled, first with the simple act of going out with Beth and her friends to celebrate her move, to the end when he was trying to tell her why he wanted her to move to CA with him. I believed him when he said that he loves Beth. It was heartbreaking to me when he couldn't justify why he loved her and I think she misread the whole thing and completely forgot all the gestures that Adam did throughout the movie to show how much he cared. He should have told her what Gerard Butler's character told Katherine Heigl at the end of "The Ugly Truth". She asked Gerard Butler why he loved her and all he could say was, "Beats the hell out of me." He just did. It was the same way I felt about my ex. I just loved him for reasons unknown to both of us.

I like how the ending was left open though. I think Adam has grown up in the last year to pick up that phone and call Beth and perhaps start anew. I think he's going to take the same advice he gave his friend, Harlan, about Harlan's what-could-have-been relationship from decades ago and apply it to his own life and reopen some sort of communication with Beth. We'll never know.

I think her note to Adam was hopeful. "Look how far we have come." He obviously made a tremendous impact on her life to inspire her to finish her book. I believe she left an opening for him with that line. I wouldn't conclude that it ended sadly, folks. It was realistic, but it was also hopeful.

then bring up Carol, the 'girl with the boxes', cause she was interested in the same things he was, she worked there and frankly, a better match just on those qualifications than Beth ever was. Of course, you never forget your first love, but first loves are just that.
Your mum might get the clue that you have to kiss a few frogs before you find the princess (so to speak). Each is a learning experience and we do get better with practice.

I have been married three times (one spouse died in Vietnam, one in the Loma Prieta quake) so I know we have opportunities.
Just because we love people doesn't mean we get to be with them you know.

Last edited by sinsboldly on 16 Aug 2009, 11:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

i also found the end confusing. were we supposed to assume that they get together later at some point? or not? it was too ambiguous.

I wonder if the director/writers/actors ever looked at wrongplanet for hints.

It was sad that Adam and Beth didn't get together, but it was realistic. As some have said, the ending was pretty open ended and we have no idea if Adam and Beth reunite or if he finds another love. What we do know is that he has grown in the intervening year and the future is open to him.

It was a great movie.

I can't find a theater here that is playing this movie.

I saw it at the 9:40PM show at Regal Fox Tower 10 846 SW Park Avenue, Portland, OR -
(800) 326-3264 x327

Frankly, I'm glad they didn't go with a crappy "happily ever after" nonsense.

In reality, anyone with a disability needs to find someone truly special, and most NTs are too self-centered to be in a relationship with other NTs.

(n) autism ((psychiatry) an abnormal absorption with the self; marked by communication disorders and short attention span and inability to treat others as people

[edited later:] this is an ironic rejoinder to the quote by zer0netgain

Last edited by sinsboldly on 17 Aug 2009, 6:55 am, edited 1 time in total.

I now know why people don't feel real to me (mindless but unpredictable automatons with no feelings is a good definition).

Praise be to the psychiatry god.

(I'm dead serious here.)

I just saw it last Thursday the 13th at Regal Meridian (Seattle). It was the only screening day that I am aware of.