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ColdBlooded
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17 Aug 2009, 6:47 am

Does anyone else here feel like they are constantly unsure of themselves? Like, you need constant reassurance that you're doing something the right way, or else you get worried that you've missed something important and are getting it all wrong? I've noticed that i'm like this a lot. I even notice it in how i word things. If someone asks me a question, i have this habit of very often saying "i think..." or "i guess..." before my response, even if i'm pretty sure that i'm getting it right.. just to leave room for the possibility that i could be getting it wrong. I've been noticing that because at work it will cause confusion. Someone will ask a question, and i'll start with "i think (blahblahblah)" and they'll ask "you THINK? you don't KNOW?" I don't know if this has anything to do with AS, is a result of anxiety, or just a personality flaw.



idiocratik
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17 Aug 2009, 6:56 am

ColdBlooded wrote:
Does anyone else here feel like they are constantly unsure of themselves? Like, you need constant reassurance that you're doing something the right way, or else you get worried that you've missed something important and are getting it all wrong? I've noticed that i'm like this a lot. I even notice it in how i word things. If someone asks me a question, i have this habit of very often saying "i think..." or "i guess..." before my response, even if i'm pretty sure that i'm getting it right.. just to leave room for the possibility that i could be getting it wrong. I've been noticing that because at work it will cause confusion. Someone will ask a question, and i'll start with "i think (blahblahblah)" and they'll ask "you THINK? you don't KNOW?" I don't know if this has anything to do with AS, is a result of anxiety, or just a personality flaw.


Yeah, I feel that way sometimes.


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tweety_fan
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17 Aug 2009, 7:12 am

Me too.



southwestforests
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17 Aug 2009, 7:16 am

ColdBlooded wrote:
Does anyone else here feel like they are constantly unsure of themselves? Like, you need constant reassurance that you're doing something the right way, or else you get worried that you've missed something important and are getting it all wrong?


Yes.


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EvoVari
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17 Aug 2009, 7:30 am

Yes, all the time.

Doctors confuse me the worst, at times they avoid giving definite answers and contradict each other.

People have often told me I seek reassurance all the time. Most times I'm not quite sure if I have done something wrong or acted inappropriate unless someone is direct with me, they usually gossip behind your back.

Being anxious in the company of people exaccerbates my lack of thought processing and I just pull faces, say hmmm until things get clearer.



ColdBlooded
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17 Aug 2009, 7:45 am

Oooo, looks like i'm not alone!

I also think i tend to apologize too often. Like, if i get the impression that something might possibly be going wrong and i might possibly be part of the cause(even if i don't know why or what's going on), i'll say "sorry" just to make sure i don't cause any offense.



idiocratik
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17 Aug 2009, 7:52 am

ColdBlooded wrote:
Oooo, looks like i'm not alone!

I also think i tend to apologize too often. Like, if i get the impression that something might possibly be going wrong and i might possibly be part of the cause(even if i don't know why or what's going on), i'll say "sorry" just to make sure i don't cause any offense.


I suck at apologizing, cos I usually don't care if anyone's offended (at least not in the moment).


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deadeyexx
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17 Aug 2009, 7:55 am

Yes, I stick to activities where thinking too much is a good thing.



Greentea
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17 Aug 2009, 8:08 am

How can we be sure of anything when we miss 75% of what's going on around us when humans are involved, which is most of the time? Of course we second-guess ourselves all the time, and that's how it should be. We can only second-guess ourselves less when we've mastered a certain unwritten social rule, and even then, it can be so intertwined with other unwritten social rules we haven't yet discovered that we're probably blundering anyway.


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17 Aug 2009, 9:15 am

I see it as OCD behavior and yes I am like that too. It sucks when on the job. Often if I don't perform tasks on a regular basis I will not feel confident or remember every little detail. And I am a nonverbal which is hard on my selfconfidence in many situations, because many NTs seem to believe people should pick up the info and run with it.
I see it as doubting your ability and questioning if you are right or wrong. Living with so much fear of the what if that it becomes paralyzing.



bluerose
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17 Aug 2009, 9:19 am

I used to be like that all the time, I noticed I'm getting more confident as I get older though. I think confidence is mostly a practiced thing and also it depends on how many positive experiences a person has. A person can't be confident in themselves if they don't have anything to base that confidence on. And anxiety can mess with confidence a lot, I noticed that the people that are confident do screw up sometimes but they recover very fast and don't let it effect them.



Jacoby
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17 Aug 2009, 9:33 am

Definitely. I don't want to make the wrong decision so I constantly want reassurance when I can get it. If I can put the decision on somebody else I usually do. I'm the type of person that expects the worst possible scenario so it best that it's not my fault when it does.



Homer_Bob
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17 Aug 2009, 9:35 am

All the time. I'm always unsure of myself and I never truly know if I do things the right way.



DarkAngel
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17 Aug 2009, 10:00 am

I Feel That Way All The Time :(



activebutodd
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17 Aug 2009, 10:43 am

Constantly



ChangelingGirl
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17 Aug 2009, 11:38 am

Yes, I need a lot of reassurance, too. Often quesiton my judgments, actions, etc.