Went out last night.

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I desided to hit the town yesterday, mostly out of curiousity what "normals" do and how when they go out. (It cost me around 20€ but I can live with that.) Proved to be a complete waste. With music between 100-114 dB (I have a sound-monitor in my phone) all sort of verbal interaction below straight out yelling was impossible, the first place I went to was ok, they actually had things to do, like bowling and the music was not that high (~94 dB). Extremly expencive though. Not too much people.

Next place was... worse. And of course it was crowded. Lights flashing and music beyond pain level. I think the bartenders there can read lips 'cause there's no way they could hear the orders. People were jumping and running everywhere, I don't understand how anyone can do anything in there. I have however noticed that people don't go there to socialize, it's some kind of way to confirm already existing friendships.

And, as the aspie I am, I ended up analyzing music videos (is really gang culture that gloryfied in the US?) and trying to calculate 6^6 in my head. I'm glad no one asked me what I was doing. ^^
And I have to confess that as the night progressed I felt I was unable to sustain my "happy face" and slide over more and more often to my aspie face. Which can look rather harsh. And depressingly not another aspie in sight.
The highlight of the evening was when they played Pinks "So What".

So I can tell you, you're not missing anything. ^^

All pointless eh? Yes, you are beginning to understand. Anything above 80-90 dB, for extended exposure, will damage the hairs in your cochlea and cause hearing loss. Quite frankly, much of what people go for seems alien and intrusive and makes no sense to me, either.

I start to look hostile, unhappy, and out of place after just an hour or so of this, even with hearing protection. I must go, because staying just makes it worse and trying to force myself into the right expression just doesn't work!

Here's another song that fits the situation, and also a reminder not to compare myself to others:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPRDC1X0IBM[/youtube]

Ohh, I knew it was pointless before I went (have known for severeal years), I just proved it to myself to make sure it wasn't just in my mind. ^^
It must be very confusing to be controlled by chemicals in the brain istead of logic. (Just look at how we react when we fall in love!)

Dito, but it took me two hours, after that I started becoming very tired and left.

Why be like every one els, there are already countless people who are that way.

Many clubs festure some kind of lounge area were you can talk more easily, but iam no aspie as far as i know and judge my self and even i find it a kind of pointless. Some of my friends seem some how to enjoy this kind of behavior, they find it interresting to flirt non verbally. I personally be prefer an verball aproach, i think your resentyment is not totally an aspie thing.

I think there is some kind of crowed expierience for some people in clubs like this, similliar to a rock concert. As far as i comperhend its about stopping to think and turning in somekind super organism, being part of the crowed and totally let your self go.Alcohol or Extasy may help with this, but i dont expierience it my self and only know it from wath some raver/metal friend of mine told me.

Yeah, I need this right now. I too went out last night, having been forced to go to a party, and it was as alternatingly dull and depressing an experience as it ever is. In the abstract, I really desire social interaction, but any time I do, I'm left feeling a) Exhausted, and irritated by this exhaustion b) bored. Where is the fun is talking to someone you don't know for a while about things you don't care about, then moving on to have a near carbon copy conversation with someone else?
I too have trouble keeping my game face up after an hour or so; luckily i was able to sneak away somewhere quiet after a while.
Interestingly tho, there was another aspie ( I assume) at the party. He was an old psychology professor and any time he got introduced to someone, he would talk some (very interesting) psychology at them. It was funny to watch him in action and it gave me a window on my future. The thing was, he really got stuck in; he didn't shy away from the strangers, although he is, i have been informed, a very shy person. Perhaps there's hope for us yet!

I have to confess, I went out today again, the last place I had to visit in our little town, and it was quite nice too. Loud but nice. I got to be alone for a few hours to get used to the sound and impressions, then I met a few old class mates from 7:th-9:th grade and we exchanged few enough words to keep both me and them happy.
The thing I enjoyed most was the music, although the DJ had the very annoying habbit to change song allmost at random, not playing them to the end.

Put together it was a good night out. I even got complimented (I think. ^^) by one of my ex-class mates, that I'm still myself.

Oh my god Silvervarg, I totally understand. I am exactly the same way. When I was in high school I'd go to dances and mixers, and although I do love club music and dancing, it was always TOO LOUD. I also can't enjoy people's company very well when I can't even hear them speak and I'm on sensory overload because of the noise.

Sometimes I like going to clubs before they get too busy and loud, just to watch, or with a friend. It's like watching the circus.

But I was wondering: What kind of club would you like to go to, if it existed?

Among some groups, yes.

I love going out clubbing but only around once a month. The loud music is annoying but at least it stops you needing to make small talk. I kind of feel normal in a club because I was taught to dance by a friend and I find dancing with people a lot easier than making conversation with them. I'm actually surprised that more aspies don't like the chance to socialize in an environment where conversation isn't essential.

That's why I don't go clubbing, that and the alcohol and drugs at those places.

The alcohol and drugs are the best bit. I tell people the only way I can go is if I get wasted beforehand and everyone thinks I'm brave for going in the first place rather than question my boozing and drug taking . It works really well with my friends who are all quite anti-drugs because I just say I'm doing it for my social anxiety.

Well, the nightclub was OK, with severeal rooms the volume was optional between 84-100 dB, so you could talk to people if you tried.
(Edit: Hmm... is it very aspie to go out an monitor the exact dB in different rooms when you go out to have a good time? )


Yeah, that's fun. Since I live in a small town (< 100 000 inh.) it doesn't get that bad unless it's some event.

Hmm... it would be something between a library and what it is now.


Gee... That's almost sad in a weird way.


Because when you can't talk, nonverbal is used to a 100%...? This I noticed too, all their bodylanguage was raised to atleast the double, but I don't know if that was just becuase of intoxication.


Wow, that was sad. You lie to the people who cares about you to hide your addiction...

I'm definately not a drug addict. I play sport regularly, don't smoke (tobacco anyway), have the healthiest diet and lifestyle of anyone I know, and generally take great care of myself. I am a picture of perfect health. I do like to have a blow out from time to time and that does involve drugs and alcohol. We all have vices and I have far less than anyone else I know. One of my friends chain smokes and gets drunk 3 or 4 times a week and he criticises me for occaisionally smoking hash. My friends do care about me but they have misconceptions about drugs. I appreciate their concern hugely and they are great friends and I only lie about my motives for taking drugs because I don't want to get into an argument with a friend over an issue that we wont agree on, especially as they have very little knowledge of drugs and their views on drugs are based on prejudice rather than experience.

So there,

Yes, and I want that app ! !!

If you say so.


It comes as a standard with the Nokia 5140. Very good phone, you can do almost anything to it, it won't break.