Em... My "Case"

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Glutamate
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02 Oct 2009, 9:34 am

Hello, this is my first thread :roll:

My case is it: I like a very beautiful NT girl, who call her I-IV-I for now (musicians can understand this joke/code :wink: )

Well: I-IV-I is a bit older than me, only a year and she is very very sociable, but she have her solitarie side too. She had bad, very bad luck in love matters (her last boyfriend... well, you can imagine the rest). The terrible trouble with her is she is very unstable.
She is very smart, but she likes like any other NT girl...

I meet her the past year in a course. In beginning all was well, but my constant looking to her made her fell bad. This is a past episode: now I-IV-I and me have a long distance friendship. The last time when I talk her personally was a year ago. Now the contacts are by msn or telephone, specially now, because I suffering depression (for the death of my twin) and she says "I love you too much"
Love in the sense of friendship, obviously :roll:

Well, this are the questions:

1) How an aspie can seduce a very solicited NT girl? A very general question
2) How can express my affect for her without like to be a psycho? Affect in sense of "atenttion"
3) How I talk with her in such a way she don't get bored/incomoded? She and me have some common interest, but I like talk about MY interest...

Well, this is the matter, for now. I seriusly thinking about give up D:

See ya!

PD: Excuse my bad engrish :lol:

Last edited by Glutamate on 03 Oct 2009, 1:28 am, edited 1 time in total.

Shebakoby
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02 Oct 2009, 5:10 pm

Glutamate wrote:

Hello, this is my first thread :roll:

My case is it: I like a very beautiful NT girl, who call her I-IV-I for now (musicians can understand this joke/code :wink:

)

Well: I-IV-I is a bit older than me, only a year and she is very very sociable, but she have her solitarie side too. She had bad, very bad luck in love matters (her last boyfriend... well, you can imagine the rest). The terrible trouble with her is she is very unstable.
She is very smart, but she likes like any other NT girl...

I meet her the past year in a course. In beginning all was well, but my constant looking to her made her fell bad. This is a past episode: now I-IV-I and me have a long distance friendship. The last time when I talk her personally was a year ago. Now the contacts are by msn or telephone, specially now, because I suffering depression (for the death of my twin) and she says "I love you too much"
Love in the sense of friendship, obviously :roll:

Well, this are the questions:

1) How an aspie can seduce a very solicited NT girl? A very general question
2) How can express my affect for her without like to be a psycho? Affect in sense of "atenttion"
3) How I talk with her in such a way she don't get bored/incomoded? She and me have some common interest, but I like talk about MY interest...

Well, this is the matter, for now. I seriusly thinking about give up D:

See ya!

PD: Excuse my bad engrish :lol:

It would help if I knew what "solicited' means.

Get her talking and let her do most of it. Listen or at least pretend to.

Glutamate
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Joined: 16 Sep 2009
Gender: Male
Posts: 37

03 Oct 2009, 12:55 am

Shebakoby wrote:

Glutamate wrote:

Hello, this is my first thread :roll:

My case is it: I like a very beautiful NT girl, who call her I-IV-I for now (musicians can understand this joke/code :wink:

It would help if I knew what "solicited' means.

Get her talking and let her do most of it. Listen or at least pretend to.

My english is bad :roll:

solicited= many nt boys are trying to seduce her :roll:

These idea looks nice...

Northeastern292
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03 Oct 2009, 10:12 pm

Glutamate wrote:

Hello, this is my first thread :roll:

My case is it: I like a very beautiful NT girl, who call her I-IV-I for now (musicians can understand this joke/code :wink:

I wish I could help you, but I've had bad luck in this department myself. First, don't overbear yourself to her (you established this in question #2). Second, show her that you're willing to pay attention. Third...I wish I had a third.

Anyways, I have sort of a different problem. I'm trying to win the heart of a NT girl whose sort of quiet and isn't quite often solicited for dates, but she doesn't do much dating, hence the psuedo-popular type.

Merle
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03 Oct 2009, 10:52 pm

Do you want to sleep/seduce her or do you want a setup for a long term relationship?

If you are not honest and willing to change who you are to be her "perfect" suitor, then you can achieve the prior fairly quickly. If you're after the latter, then it's a tougher row to hoe.

1. Seduction in the most general sense of the word has you starting down the road of PUA's. You dress the part, act successful and be an extreme extrovert. You're mainly going to be playing the field and the odds. Think sperm trying to fertilize an egg, fortune favors the bold and daring.

2. Say "I like you, but not in just a friend kind of way" and leave it at that. You can stall, open up a dialog afterwards or (assuming she doesn't care) just leave it at that.

3. Nice guys always listen to the girl talk. It's a strength (he listens) and a downfall (he's not interesting enough to have much to talk about himself).

Glutamate
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04 Oct 2009, 7:21 pm

"Seduction" only for a long term relationship.

CerebralDreamer
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04 Oct 2009, 7:56 pm

Since you seem to know her pretty well, I have a pretty good line, but you'll have to modify it I'm sure. Anytime it's a friend you have romantic feelings for the approach is actually rather simple. With my current girlfriend we were simply 'friends', and I wanted to take it further. I asked her how she would feel about us going on a date, and the next thing I know we were making out in my car. It's an approach that seems to work really well.

Just ask her how she would feel about you two dating, or going on a date. If by chance you do get rejected, it won't be nearly as awkward. Plus, it shows you've put some thought behind it but want to take it slow.

Merle
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04 Oct 2009, 10:30 pm

Glutamate wrote:

"Seduction" only for a long term relationship.

Okay, for a long term relationship to have an honest chance, you're going to need to be comfortable with yourself and accept that she may reject you for who you are. You can "fake it" but in the long run, it's going to catch up on you and you won't have a relationship at all.

Since you have an 'in' with her, then setting up a series of 'dates' is going to work to your advantage (you don't need to rush or figure out the ice breaker stage, you're past it).

Go out casually as friends. Get to know her. Within a couple of dates (2-3) you're going to need to figure out how she feels about you.

There's nothing wrong with telling her your feelings and measuring her response. You're either going to be accepted or she's going to turn off.

And that's the hard part. Most people think if they give it more time, the other person will 'come around'. So they try to set up artificial scenarios and plot long term schemes.

But cut to the chase. A few dates to feel her out, confess how you're feeling and measure her response.

Now, that's not a 100% guarantee she'll come around. She's a person after all and people are fickle and no one solution is absolute.

Glutamate
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05 Oct 2009, 2:56 am

Thanks for everyone

PD: someone could guess the girl's name? :lol:

Janissy
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05 Oct 2009, 9:12 am

Glutamate wrote:

Thanks for everyone

PD: someone could guess the girl's name? :lol:

Gluta?

Glutamate
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05 Oct 2009, 10:30 am

Not.
the I and IV grades in A scale (minor or major) are A and D.
I IV I = ADA

:lol: :badpun

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