I got fired today

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It was the best job in the world. It was perfect for me. I was a filmmaker for a company that made history films. I was a shooter, editor, and did a ton of great research. Then today, when I was supposed to have a script meeting with my producer, I instead find myself with him and the co-owner of the company. He said, "It's just not working." The reasons were many: Financial (they've had some legal issues with a former partner). They lost a valuable worker to retirement, and didn't feel I was ready to fill his place, so they needed to hire somebody else. That I wasn't as skilled doing commerical (i.e. paying work). That I hadn't gelled with the rest of the staff. On the last point, I'm sure they're right, knowing the way I am. I really enjoyed working with them, but I realize that I am not the most worthwhile person to hang with. People can do much better than me.

I've got nothing now. No job. No girlfriend. There's plenty of better, more qualified people out there with my skill set. I feel like I've worked hard my whole life, and for four months I had the dream, and now I've lost it. You don't get many opportunities like that. I feel like my life is over. I don't know what to do. Don't know how to tell my family or my friends. Don't know how to get past the thought that I'm a loser who'll never have a good woman, or friends who want him around, or a job that inolves anything other than working in some back room away from all contact.

I hope and pray that all I've had to work through and endure was for a reason, but I just don't know. I'm a loser whose spent so many years and so much money making films that no one cares about, no one wants to see, that aren't any good. I'm a hack. I even said out loud that I would sell my soul to the devil to make just one film that people would treasure and love. My souls isn't even worth it to him.

I won't say I want to kill myself, because I don't. I'd be a quitter, and I couldn't do that to my family. But I want the pain to go away. I can't face another fifty years of life like this. I'm so tired of working hard and being strong and getting nothing for it but heartache. I'm starting to see that it doesn't matter what I do. I just don't have what it takes to be a human being worth having around.

First of all: You are NOT a loser!
I have also been fired with the words " its not working", once in my life. I know how it can really pull off all of the fragile self confidence you can have struggling with life as many of us with AS do.
What you feel now is normal and need its time but the pain will eventually go away

Then I feel I can relate to the job you lost. Im also making films but I havent come that far as you working with it. Its a well aware choise I have made because I dont want to kill my moviecreativity with putting myself in such a situation where I risk to end up as you....Im probably a coward out of that. But my experiences with having a work based on special interests is bad....

So, You HAVE achieved something in your life that gave you value and experience. Never forget that!!
I understand it can be hard to tell family and friends. Its like a shame and a failure and who want to expose himself like that to people who care? But hopefully you get support and encourage from them once you overcome the dreadful moment when you inform them.

If you like to talk about filmmaking you are welcome to talk to me if you like even if I dont have such fancy skills like you have, but at least share the interest...

+1

yowch... well. all i could say to someone i don't even know is that it looks like you have a brand new opportunity ahead of you. sounds lame, right? trust me, romance really gets things complicated. even if you have biological urges, which is human enough, adding a person into your life makes situations more confusing. maybe it's a good thing you don't have a partner right now. i don't know. it's a double edged sword, know what i mean? also it doesn't help to call yourself a loser. it seems like you are at a turning point. do you want to continue making films? doesn't anyone need a good editor? do you still have a good relationship with your newly ex-boss, or any of your old bosses. it's called social networking and may seem scary, but what have you got to lose? it's a chance, i think. maybe it's a chance to get some truth out of people.

you feel like your life is over? maybe this phase is. i don't know you. but if you see things the way i see them, which is like a sine wave, then there are phases in which there is construction and destruction. so there is always a chance to start something new.

I'm sorry to hear that. I was in danger of getting fired, until i phoned my supervisor on sunday morning after a night in the emergency ward.

Well, consider this tale: I had worked with a retailer for 4 years (i didnt like it for numerous reasons, but will discuss that later). Well, for a year and a half, i had worked towards a AS degree in Biotechnology. 4 - 5 months later, i get a call to work for a local lab group, gave the retailer a 2 day notice (the lab job was short notice), quit them, and worked for the lab group . . . for three days. The third day, i get a call from my staffing agency that the lab's higher ups called saying they didnt need me anymore. I was without a job for almost two years . . . i had savings, but ive recently had to move out of my apartment, and back in with my parents. Leaving the retailer was likely a mistake, but i do NOT miss it. Thing is, they should have valued you and your expertise, but they didnt. Working anywhere is a based on the assumption that you need the job more than they need you, ergo they have NO reason to keep you if they dont want to. What you have now though is years of experience . . . this means you can ask for more money from any group that is willing to pay your price. My philosophy is that you only owe a company loyalty for as long as you are employed with them . . . after that, dont worry about them but keep searching for jobs on the side. Your future is the only thing you need to worry about for your lifetime, not the future of who you want/will work for (how long they remain when you leave is up to them). So, just buckle down, get to the ads, search the internet for video/media jobs, put in applications, update your resume, and wait.

Its not ur fault, its the companies.. Do they know you have AS?.Its a shame you dont live in Canada, where you can drag them to a human rights commission for discrimination based on disabliltiy. The govt will pay your legal fees, they will have to pay their own regardless of the outcome, which means even if you get nothing, they will stil pay out the nose in legal fees trying to defend themselves.

I've lost count of how many times I've been fired, I've had more jobs in the past 10 years than most people have in their lifetime. Don't let it get to you, they're looking at the bottom line and think there's someone else out there that's better whether there is or not.

Want to get them back though? Next time you apply for a job somewhere, put down your last job as a reference. If they're smart, they'll know that there's absolutely no shortage of lawyers who will jump at the chance to sue if they give you a bad reference. If they even so much as mention firing you to your new employer, you can sue them for plenty more than they ever paid you in the first place, and the lawyer won't charge you a dime until you get your settlement money.

Then you can try to imagine what was going through the mind of the person who just fired you but is now trying to praise you as being the best person he ever hired.

Not a great situation!
I know how it feels like.....like having everything ripped away.

Don't quit the filming though. I realise that it will be difficult on limited income, and impossible on none, but doing some research into stuff you'd like to film should be possible so as you keep that aspect of yourself alive .

I've just discovered emoticons since being on WP, a bit more than a month. If you hate them i'm sorry.

I am very sorry to hear about you losing your job. If you need us, we're always here.

Maybe you should try your chance with the NFB http://www.nfb.ca/, they mostly let film what you want. With the actual political situation they lack money though...