Want it and don't want it.

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so earlier i was looking at a post someone made about having a happy day. they just spent it doing random stuff in the city with their wife. it sounded like such a nice, laid-back day. i know how good this can be with a friend. but i've never had a relationship. i can imagine things like this would be great.
i long for someone to just spend life with. i'm such a hopeless romantic. someone who i know is mine til i die, and vice versa...someone to take the kids out to dinner with...someone to just laugh with.

then i get in those moods where i cant imagine that sort of dedication. it just seems too distant and i feel incapable of that kind of commitment.

what gives! :/. any one else feel the same way? i hope i find the right person. :/

You're only 17 don't worry about it, also: Your life won't change with a partner, i.e. try to imagine your entire life mostly single and all the events that would occur anyway even if you didn't have a partner. The only difference is... that life is real life you just add a partner. Partners can give you happyness but they can also be a pain in the ass.

Marriage is hard BECAUSE life is hard and most people have no clue who they are or what they really want as it keeps changing as they grow older - all relationships have risk, but those are the risks you take loving someone.

I didn't get into something I truly wanted to commit to fully until three years ago. It was actually at 17 that I announced to friends and family that I never wanted a relationship. Heh. Look at me now. It was really unexpected.

Things change with age, I can attest to that.

Hey, it's supposed to be men who can't commit

i think i have half a male brain.

Right now you are in the middle of major physical, social and mental chaos. You may feel incapable of finding or making a long-term commitment now, but the person you'll be in 10 years might be fine with the idea and have figured out how to make it happen. Ride out the storm.

That should make it easier. Two male brains can agree that nobody has to commit.

but the other half is female.

Total BEE ESS, man. Women have a hell of a time committing, especially the younger they are. Lack of commitment can stem from a lot of things, too. "Avoidant attachment" is a common issue in today's society for lots of reasons and is the quintessential noncommittal bent. I'd bet a huge number of Aspies fall into that category of attachment style.

What you describe is very much the basis of a dream. You can't imagine what you have never experience and so that information is random and makes no sense, because your brain attempts to "guess"

Yes ! I think too much. What of it??

I sometimes contemplate having a very romantic relationship with someone. But I also know that I'm probably too weird for that to actually happen, so I desire the opposite - complete isolation. My mind is never made up.

yeah. i hope for some crazy miracle that i will have a relationship with someone as wierd as me. XD then it can be wierdly romantic...XD

A butcher perhaps? (Sorry I just saw the MEAT, MEAT ........)

The main problem is finding someone who doesn't think anything negative because of my isolation. But then she would have to be isolated like me to understand. But if we're both isolated and don't really meet people how can we meet each other? One of life's many ironies.

i know. i hate ironies. the bad ones, anyways.

Yeah, i've felt that way before. I think the thing is tho, you have plenty of time to pick and choose. There isn't a huge rush at this point.

Its frustrating but when you feel you have the time to make that commitment, you can. If not, focus on the other things that bring you joy out of life until you're ready.

That's my big reason for using dating sites. I look in the hopes that I can find someone equally isolated, for similar reasons, and you'd be surprised how difficult it is.

"Search: Intellectual woman with agoraphobic tendencies and a quirky nature"
(Results: 10357, relevancy of first result, 5%.)
*bangs head*