Afraid of being eaten by cats

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I feel out of place everywhere. From the outside everything seems fine. I have multiple masters degrees, play several musical instruments, have steady employment, and study different languages. But I feel too autistic for the "regular people" and not autistic enough for the autistic people. Last year, I was friends with this guy who wanted me to be his girlfriend, except I was too stupid/naive to realize it. When I told him I had AS and wasn't interested in that kind of relationship, he was shocked. Via a number of freakishly long e-mail he basically told me that I was emotionally shallow and that he wanted a "deeper" relationship. Since socialization is so hard for me, I felt worse off than before, since now I thought I was damaged goods. I also feel like a freak and a monster, like if people knew I had AS they'd hate me for being so different (people can tell that I'm different, but they don't know why exactly). Sometimes I feel like I can barely get out of bed and that nothing will ever get better. I'm afraid of dying alone and being eaten by feral cats, but I feel that I have no choice in this matter.

Ah, but you are not. You might have missed his interest, but he was the shallow one there. You are young, thoughtful and open ... and you were just spared some heartache. Be patient a little longer ...

Last edited by leejosepho on 03 Nov 2009, 10:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Lee's spot on. Your would-be boyfriend is an idiot. Alas, a normal idiot. He clearly wasn't paying attention to who you are.

Its his loss, you don't seem to be the shallow one, I had to laugh, I
have a similar fear that if I died my ferrets would be dinning on me