How can I make friends at work?

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I work at one of my town's YMCAs and even though a lot of people are nice to me there, I don't have a lot of common with them. I'm not into sports, video games (one of my jobs is an after-school counselor, BTW) or movies I can't afford to go see.

Maybe you can try Sheldon's Friendship Algorithm.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0xgjUhEG3U[/youtube]

Hi roygerdodger.

I'm not sure you *have* to be friends with people at work. Good working relationships don't dictate that you hang out together after work, or even share common interests.

I work with a lot of people. We like each other, we get along well, we work together well, and when 4:30 comes around, we clock out and go our separate ways. That's that.

I guess what i'm saying is that you should strive for good working relationships and not worry about it if you're not pals with these people.

My work life changed dramatically for the better when I started smiling and saying good morning to people. I didn't have to do much more socializing that that, just that little bit seemed to really make a difference in how I was perceived by my coworkers.

We're better off with friendship heuristics!

People tend to be standoffish at work. That's just seems to be the way it is.

Be a builder, in a low-key fashion, and be a coach. And see if people respond in turn.

work 'friendship' is different than regular friendship, you always have to watch your back when there is money to be made, there is no real loyalty. That being said, people 'make friends' with people because they have common interests or like each other's personality. It's always commonality of whatever sort, even if it's just that they are doing the same drugs, or whatever stupid reason. I sooooooooooo didn't understand this growing up. 'Liking' someone is organic, you can follow rules of cordiality and it doesn't mean the person will like you. I just try to be cordial anymore, I don't expect anyone to like me. I pretty much bond with gay people on my jobs if I am lucky enough to be working with someone like me, which doesn't happen that often. Other than that, I am pretty guarded at work.

Don't count on making friends at work, and be careful about confiding anything to anyone because that information can be used against your employment. But you can always work on gaining goodwill and earning brownie points so that people will cooperate with you (hugely important in most workplaces).

Definitely say "hi" and smile at people. Show some interest in what other people are doing and just *listen*. I like to bring in goodies every now and then---I love baking and good food, and sharing food at work is always a good way to bribe people over to your cause. Show appreciation for other people's work even if it's their *job* to do something. Sometimes people are already being nice to you and doing you favours and trying to be your friend, but we don't see that because some social nuances are hard to see. So just assume that people are being nice and thank them anyway. If you have a coffee break, offer to pick up stuff for other people (you don't have to pay for them; the act of offering to help tells people that you know they exist and are thinking about them).

You don't have to have a lot in common with the other people. People will automatically appreciate you if they know that you will listen to them and will acknowledge their existence.

Even though I've only been employed for around three years in my life, 2005 through 2007, I've found that a lot of times coworkers may act like friends, but only to the extent that they can extract tidbits to exploit with the management and use for gossip and slandering purposes. I don't think trusting coworkers to be friends is necessarily a wise thing to do. It is difficult not to attempt to be friends though, since most of one's waking hours are spent at work if one is to make ends meet financially, but be aware that people who speak friendly words to your face equally have the ability to cut you down with their tongues behind your back.