Lesbian/Gay Bi or other Queer Aspies(positive posts please)

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I have found that there are various threads for us on WP I would like to request this be made as a sticky so we can more easily find eachother. This is important as we are a double minority and WP is the only place I have found other queer Aspies actively posting. I would like to let you all know of a yahoo group I discovered it has alot of potential but is not very active http://groups.yahoo.com/group/TheOtherQueers/

There is a general dating thread but I would like to encourage you to post here you may never meet but atleast it gives a sense of community, connecting on the internet takes away all the social pressure. If anyone feels the urge to make an offensive post make it an exercise in self restraint. I am 32 always considered myself lesbian though I had a detour and now have 2 children I would like to find a non NT girlfriend though I have found the profoundly social ones work better to interpret the world to me and me to the world, and they are inexplicably drawn to me also .I am obsessed with plants and animal species ID my focus seems to be shifting to fungi/lichens mosses this happens in winter. I am a community college student living in southern Oregon.

I'm bisexual, which has it's positives and negatives. Very few negatives actually because around Portland, Oregon I'm realizing heterosexuals are soon going to be a minority.. I guess it would make sense to make this a sticky but I doubt there are going to be many hookups. I know I know, sounds cynical, but being a double minority means that people are spread really thin; however I find it irrelevant personally because of my bad experience with relationships which has resulted in me curbing my enthusiasm about the prospect, a lot. On one hand I would say this would be great because I might not be the only person in this position. I would easily say also that I would only be satisfied in a relationship with a person on the autism spectrum and not NT. Apart from being completely being taken advantage of and not knowing how to stand up for myself, the thing that made it hard to relate to people that I associated with casually was all these "typical" expectations that they had, something that seemed to be innate in each of them. It was annoying as hell. Oh well, all in the past now right? Sorry for the tangent but I'll just throw my experience along with my less than optimistic perspective out for everyone to see.

I find your post quite valid and introspective not cynical it is common to feel this way when you are 17 or 32 for that matter. Yes expectations are the main sticking point with being in a NT relationship they say they understand but they cant all they can do is accept. Our being a double minority is all the more reason why we need forums such as wrong planet to connect .

Are we all from Oregon?? haha

I have an attraction mostly to males, but have been infatuated with a couple females in my past. AS on top of this is certainly quite a sub-subset of the population.

My problem is all the processing I have to do intellectually with intimacy is so overbearing I just avoid relationships most of the time. I can't understand social cues and my lack of empathy usually shoots me in the foot.

Bisexual aspie female here. I used to think I was more attracted to males but the only reason I thought that was because guys seem more available in my mind and therefore I am more likely to admit to myself that I want to bang them. When I have a crush on a female the crush is just as intense as when I have one on a male. When I was six my first crush was a next-door-neighbor girl who was a few years older than me, and I frightened my parents with how obsessed I was with her. I've had one girlfriend and the relationship did not go well, although she occasionally still e-mails me when she wants attention. Rawr. I'm not one of those people who thinks that I would rather be with another female because we would "understand each other." Female minds are so convuluted that I'm convinced we don't even understand each other. I love the soft curves and hair, though...

Bi aspie male... prefer males.

Ahh, labels. For some reason I feel I need to add my two cents to this thread, if only to add to the number of people who don't really fit into any one category. As a woman, I find it much easier to have relationships with men - both as friends and lovers. They don't play games the way women do, and I don't have a lot in common with most NT women - hair, clothes, makeup, etc. But I'm more attracted to women sexually than men.

Interesting. My relationships with men were pretty functional, and we got along well and had pretty good fun together. My relationships with women have been complete mind-bending disasters. I identify queer, my main attractions are to people who are centered between genders, mostly butch women, ftm's, etc. I like androgynous males but I don't want to sleep with them, I just think they are incredibly beautiful people. I think I am doomed, though, because the women I am most attracted to go for the high-femme, bi girls or straight girls who are just experimenting...I have been there in the past but I just don't want to do that anymore. I think my chances for romance are pretty low.

while there are some that say they are completely lesbian or gay its been my experience that almost all fall into a grey area , I have never been attracted to men but have always liked having them as friends. I had been alone for 4 years after a 4yr relationship with a woman (and dating one ) then after being pushed together by fate and a whole lot of coercion I got involved with a male friend ,in short I ended up pregnant and married. While he knew I was lesbian when we met and now accepts that we can only be friends its either that or enemies neither of us can regret as we have two awesome children and are eachothers support. The odd thing is I am only sexually attracted to women but only three times there has been one I got all fluttery over One I was with for 4yrs one for 2weeks and the other was already attached. The crazy thing is in the last year I have had 3 different women actively perusing me but I just run, one Ive had to just cut off relation for the most part one remains basically my only longterm friend . The third one though is why I am writing this I may need some advice if anyone is willing she is quite persistent but I am so bad at the relationship thing . I will copy from another of my posts to explain.
Posted: Sun Jan 17, 2010 1:57 pm Post subject:
I am contemplating getting myself tangled up in a poly relationship , "Amy" has been in a relationship with her GF for 2 yrs but her GF is accustomed to being in an open relationship and has taken up a secondary GF. I have known "Amy" off and on for over a year and was always attracted though I am not exactly a sexually motivated being she is and has basically asked me to be her secondary . I have a crazy notion this may work I have neither the time energy or inclination to get seriously involved with anyone right now.

I describe myself as a, "perfect Kinsey 6" (exclusively homosexual orientation). While I have no doubt that I could physically perform a heterosexual sex act--but it is abundantly clear to me that there would be no mental attraction. I don't see much "shade of gray" in my sexuality.

I support the need for a queer positive forum on WP. I find it a tad frustrating wandering through "Love and Dating" looking for a gay tag in a subject heading, and would really like to have a place where I can share experiences with other queer aspies.

im a gay male.

FTM bisexual (prefer women romantically) Aspie here.

I'm glad to see that this forum is active. I have found other forums on the Internet, such as Aspies for Freedom, which have excellent discussions but I can hear the tumbleweeds whistling across the plains because most of the posts there are several years old.

bisexual aspie is a redundant term