Jealousy/sibling rivalry

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I don't know if anyone else has this problem, but it's worth a shot.

I've been having a problem with being jealous of my brother for a long time now. He's a year and a half younger than I am, and we get along fairly decently most of the time, but I'm always secretly jealous of him.

I think I'm an Aspie, but the only thing I can compare my social interactions to are my brother's, since I'm not social enough to know anyone else well enough. However, my brother is a very inaccurate yardstick. Both my parents have admitted, multiple times, that his social interactions are noticeably above normal.

I guess you could extend the spectrum to not just being varying degrees of autistic behavior, but to varying degrees of neurotypical behavior. If you did so, my brother would probably be off the charts for neurotypical behavior, like enjoyment of being around other people, making friends quickly, finding common interests with almost everyone, and making conversation with the few people he has nothing in common with.

I can't even tell where I am on the spectrum, because although it seems to me like he's so amazingly neurotypical that he shouldn't exist, for all I know, he might just be your average extrovert. I know the relative distance between us, socially, but not what's normal, so I have trouble identifying who I am as a person.

All I know is that I'm jealous of what he has. For the most part, I'm happy with who I am, and the two close friends I've been able to keep for thirteen years, but then I look at him, and see someone who goes to another person's house four days a week, who quite literally took two days to make a new best friend when his old one moved.

My brother can make friends with people who can't even speak English . I don't know how he does it, but it really puts things into perspective for me. (He tested this at his school, which is usually for kids who either can't speak English, Mandarin, or Cantonese fluently, or moved to Hong Kong late enough in the summer that the English schools are full)

Then, of course, there's my father, who never outright told me I was inferior due to this, but who puts extreme emphasis on making friends and connections in his own life, and it somehow came to hover over ours. My brother makes him proud by being one of those people most NTs can't help but like.

Mind you, it's not all bad. My brother and I really are like day and night. He has amazing social skills, but average reading, writing, and math skills. He has no main interests in life beyond those of a stereotypical twelve year old boy.

I have much better mathematics and science skills. I'm not a genius or anything, but I'd put myself in the top 10% of my grade, just judging the time it takes me versus twenty other students to complete our work. Still, in my family, this isn't valued as highly as my brother's skills.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has to deal with jealousy of NT siblings? If so, how do you deal with it?

I have three siblings and one is Mr. Personality. He would like to think this makes him superior, because his grades are inferior. Mom insists we are all equal. Mom rules.
I can't be jealous of him because I would be miserable if I needed people like that.

I have one sibling. However, he has consistently proven himself to have an IQ below room temperature and if he has any social skills, he's certainly never displayed them to me. My earliest memories include him destroying my belongings, and physically hurting me.

It's not so much a rivalry, as it was a feud. As of late I refuse to accept the notion that he could possibly be related to me in any way, and we do not speak. So, the rant aside, there's not exactly "jealousy".

My brother is a very popular kid in school. I don't have problems with this and I'm not jealous, but he always likes to remind me how I have no friends. Personally, I prefer to make friends the way I do, because it's challenging(I like challenge) and the friends I find are true ones that I can associate with and count on. But his ridicule makes me angry because he always puts me down when I do nothing to him. I have gotten into fights over his ridicule and instances where he thinks he can boss everyone around. These fights are usually very violent.

I'm not jealous of people with good social skills in general. It isn't something I much care about. Now, if my brother happened to be a millionaire, THEN I would be jealous.

My younger sister is the complete opposite of me socially. She's an extrovert in every sense of the word, and definitely not on the autism spectrum at all. But, it doesn't bother me much...I've certainly noticed how different we are, but that's not a bad thing.

I have 2 half sisters whom I have never actually met. I have talked with one online/on the phone who has been diagnosed with ADHD (she thinks she's been misdiagnosed and it's actually AS) and the other I have never communicated with. Mum has also brought various "Sisters" into my life (Mum and her men. Gah!). None of them have I been jealous of because if I had social skills I would likely be expected to use them. To be honest my skills aren't that bad, once I know someone. If I don't know them I'm a complete idiot so I just stick to my friends and am happy to do so.

I'm 20 and I still get horribly jealous when my mum is speaking to my brother instead of me, even though she does speak to me more.

My brother has MUCH better social skills that I do, but I'm not particularly jealous of him. He does try to help me with my social skills, but that really doesn't do much for me.

My sister, who's 3 years older than me, is an NT with much more social skills, but I've never been jealous of it. We used to fight a lot and not get along, but not for 5 years probably, we grew out of it.

My sister is a socialite and does not abstain from continually tormenting me about the contrast in our behaviours. She is also rather sinister, as she torments be when my parents are not present. If I reverse the behavioural patterns, and behave in a sinister manner towards her - she wails loudly and I am always scolded...

My brother is NT but doesn't seem to have as much social skills as he did when he was at school. I'm more jealous of my cousins because they all have MUCH better social skills than me and my brother put together. It makes me feel so low, really.
On most Friday nights my 18 year old cousin (who I used to be so close to) catches the bus from where she lives, all the way to where I live, just to see my 12 year old cousin and his 9 year old brother, who live just around the corner from me. She doesn't bother to think of knocking round mine and saying hello or asking if I wanted to have a little walk up the town with them, and her mum and my mum are very close sisters so she knows I don't do anything but long for someone to come round to keep me company. But she'll rather spend her time with 2 little kids than her cousin, who is also a girl and is just 2 years older. Surely I'm not that boring!

See - it's hurtful when the relatives you grew up with even think you're boring, and rather be with kids just because of their stupid social skills.

Oh won't life be heaven if I was born a NT! *sigh!*

My NT sister doesn't have the same social problems I do. But she does have some of her own. We're opposites: I have trouble with smalltalk and making friends, but I'm fine with scripted conversations. I think it's easier to talk to people who are older or younger than I am. My sister has no problem with chatting and friends, but she's terrified of asking a teacher for help or ordering a meal at a restaurant. She does much better with people her own age. She's got enough social issues of her own that I'm rarely jealous.

I have three siblings; two younger sisters and one older brother. Both sisters have no problem with making friends, in fact they are both popular at school and make friends with people of any age. I suspect my brother might have a bit of aspergers but he doesn't have a problem with making friends as much as me. They are all good at maths, science, english and often take advanced subjects at school. I'm different in the way I think, act and communicate. Instead of taking up academic subjects, I took up art related subjects like multimedia, visual design and visual arts. My mum tends to favour my other siblings and they often get away with things that I can't