The diagnosis runaround

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Quick background -- I'm a 21 year old female who is thus far...semidiagnosed. While I was in college, social anxiety problems stemming from my AS started to really interfere with my ability to function, so I tried therapy with the college's counselor (waste of time), various SSRIs they insisted were great (rather ineffective, but they did turn me into a zombie), and eventually tracked down an actual psychiatrist, hoping to get a diagnosis and some more effective help. Instead, I was told, "I feel you probably have Asperger's, but I don't see how a diagnosis would be useful, so I'm going to put you on [insert another SSRI here] and we'll see what that does."

By "more effective help" I mean assistance/therapy/whatever that actually takes into account that my social anxiety is not a problem existing in a vacuum, but rather a survival mechanism built up over the years for...well, obvious reasons. A diagnosis is important to me, among other reasons, because certain accommodations (e.g. not having to give presentations in classes, or being able to avoid certain particularly triggering situations at work) can only be obtained with one, and also because without one doctors tend to do what I mentioned above, and clomp right over me, or simply ignore my understanding of my problems (which it seems to me should be important, since, y'know, I LIVE in this head).

My problem at the moment is that I don't have a lot of money, and I'm not going to in the forseeable future, so trying out twenty different doctors to find one who will treat me like a person with dignity isn't really an option. I haven't had much luch searching online, and I'd rather eat broken glass than flip through the yellow pages calling office after office.

Does anyone have any idea how to narrow the field of prospective doctors from whom one may try to obtain a diagnosis? Recommendations of specific people in the greater Seattle area would also be appreciated, if anybody has experience with such. I'm also curious as to whether my experience in trying to obtain a diagnosis is typical for those who've tried to get one as an adult, or if I just got a particularly unhelpful psychiatrist the first time around.

I would try to be more insistent that the doctor diagnose you if he thinks you have Asperger's. Explain to him how the diagnosis would help you. Tell him about the accommodations you need and tell him that it would bring you more peace and prevent you from worrying as much. If he still refuses to diagnose you, say "OK, can you refer me to a doctor who will diagnose me with something I obviously have?" By that point, he'll probably be glad to get rid of you and refer you to someone who will diagnose you correctly.

Just my thoughts... I hope they help!

A couple of ideas - if you check the blue pages in your local phone book in the state listings for Rehabilition Commission. They can help in getting you a proper diagnosis as well as vocational services if needed.

Apply for SSI. If you don't have enough medical documentation, they will send you to an independent doctor.

Neither of these will cost you anything.

I would also recommend checking with your local ARC office, they should be listed on the internet.

Good luck.

This thread peaked my attention since I have gone to several 'sources' of counseling and they all ssid I had AS but nobody could point me in the direction of an MD who could take this to the next level. Eventually I did find a doctor and after spending about an hour and half I finally got impatient and came right out and asked him if he thought I had AS. He looked at me very surprised and said that He could have told me that after about ten minutes into our conversation. An official diagnosis however would cost about $1500-2000.
Of course a diagnosis doesn't really get you anything that you probably don't already know so it's a catch 22 situation.
If you're just looking for 'help' boards like this one are probably as good as a licensed professional will do for you, perhaps better.