What has helped you?

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I thought it might be useful to have suggestions and ideas for things that have helped people function or cope better.

Some examples:

Therapy? (What did the therapist do that actually helped?) Social skills groups? Aspie meet-ups? Other kinds of meet-ups?

Trying to put oneself out there to socialize? Keeping oneself out of stressful situations? (How?) Any successful way of learning social skills or other coping skills?

Special diet? Meds? Meditation? Buddhism?

I would list what has helped me but there's not a lot:

Meds given by a psychiatrist I actually like and who was kind and thoughtful, after years of trial and error, is one of the few things I can think of. (Abilify and Lamictal)

Also, years ago I volunteered at a community center so I was around people a lot, but in the end it was stressful and ended badly. But I did meet my bf there, and I wouldn't have if I had stayed home alone, so that was helpful but with a high price to pay.

The good ideas are what's listed. But the main one I like is probably the most difficult, putting yourself out for social situations b/c you can't learn how to cope w/ socializing w/o trying it. But I'd start w/ groups of people/events that have an activity/iterest in common with your own. This way you have something in common w/ the people you are with and (especially if the interest is a videogame/movie series, etc.) you can get away with being around people w/o talking to them constantly.

Sadly I'd have to say alcohol.

And music.

Well, I go see a psychologist every three or four weeks, and although it hasn't really helped so much in terms of being more social, sensory issues, etc., I definitely like to go and feel better afterward. However, I'm always a bundle of nerves beforehand X] Also, making my first friend last year was a major boost for me.

I found that cutting off my hair (which was long, tatty and annoying) helped with stress and sensory issues.

Music mostly. No professional help ever did for sure.

Two things have helped me best, love and meds. Having someone who loves you for who you are, is supportive of you, and tries to be as understanding of you as possible goes a long way in having less stress and anxiety. I have a wonderful fiancee who does just that. And anti-depressant or anxiety meds don't hurt either, I have only ever taken the former.

Two things:

1) Group Therapy was really useful when getting used to the outside world again after the hospital.

2) Meditation means that I'm calm and relaxed most of the time.

Vanilla_Slice

My biggest steps forward have come from circumstances where I've been forced deal with things myself, with no escape route to take. Things like flying over for my first job interview (terrifying), moving into an apartment for the first time alone (totally unknown territory, and a lot to deal with at once), and, most recently, driving myself to the emergency room for the first time (also terrifying, but not nearly as bad as suffering in silence).

Basically my biggest improvements have come from not backing down from the hard, scary things, instead of avoiding them like I usually would. It's an upsetting, stressful way to improve, but I definitely feel more capable and independent after each hurdle.

Meds (Xanax, Lexapro and Risperidone), and learning coping skills such as deep breathing, listening to calming music and putting things into perspective ("is this issue really worth getting upset over?")

Straight up, I have not had good results with mental health professionals. They tend to be "be righters." Really. Once they make an initial judgement call, if you are perceived as questioning the diagnosis, they tend to get defensive or huffy. So from the perspective of this "professional" . . . . . their being "right" is more important than the quality of my life ? ? ? Wow. But that often seems to be the way it is.

What is lost is a framework of working together where experiments can be attempted and feedback honestly and openly looked at. And by this I mean, taking a medium step, seeing how it works, adjusting, taking another medium step. A person with Asperger's indeed can depression or anxiety issues. In fact, I'd say because of more frequent social isolation and difficulties connecting with others, depression and/or anxiety is somewhat more likely with us. And not every medicine works for every person. All the more reason to have real conversation and feedback (and probably not baby steps because then you often don't get enough feedback to really see what's going on, rather medium steps).

And so, if you feel that a professional is not putting forth the effort to listen and to understand, or is not treating you as a person of equal worth along with every other person, please trust that feeling and move laterally. Yeah, get another professional.

Acceptance helps me.

There are two main things that I credit for improving my life over the last few years: WP and zenhabits.net

WP has been great in helping me accept myself and my differences, and knowing that I'm not completely alone in the world. Zen Habits has helped me to accept the world as it is, and has changed my mindset about life in general. I'm grateful for the existence of both sites, though I should probably spend less time on the internet.

Another thing that helps me is when I force myself out of my comfort zone. It's really difficult to do, and it's always utterly exhausting, but in the end I usually feel really good because I accomplished something.

No professional help has ever really done anything for me but in recent years, I've been learning to play poker. I've read quite a bit about the game theory, psychology, and human body language; Subsequently, I've been a little less freaked out by people(strangers, meeting new people) in the last 5 years. I doubt this would work for everyone, but I've noticed an improvement in the way I cope with people the past couple of years.

The thing that helped me, to help myself, was taking the steps to accept myself, as I am. It all started, last Canada Day, after that incident. It took me two months, to convince myself, that the Punk Rocker thing wasn't working for me, anymore. There was one member from my clubhouse, who was able to see it, two months before Canada Day, and she called me, a Mod. I was convinced, in September, when I got angry at a bus driver, for turning the radio down, when 'You Really Got Me', by The Kinks was playing on the radio. I got a real hair cut, a week later, when I got a paycheque from my parking lot job, and I haven't spiked my hair, since. Nor do I plan to do so, ever again. I've also told myself, that I'm vulnerable and sensitive, and that it's okay, to be that way and I've even found myself a role model, who has those two traits. That was my road, towards self-acceptance.

Having friends and meeting people who are on the same boat as me.