How do you..

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define AS to those who have never even heard of it?


My son has been diagnosed since Sept 2005, and I still struggle to explain or define it for people. I want to do as much as I can to help the people in his life have a better grasp as to what AS means.

Another question...Is AS hereditary? I strongly suspect that my son's father has AS as well. I know I dont have it, and I have two other children who do not show any signs....I wondered in the beginning if there was something I may have done during pregnancy or something. I think perhaps some of this is the guilt of a parent, that we feel from time to time.


Thank you
Candace

trying to explain aspie-ness to others can be quite difficult at times....some people will just never get it. i've tried making analogies with tv characters that they might be familiar with ( monk, for example). in the end, i usually just say that my son and hubby have difficult times with social situations and that they take people quite literally.
as far as how your son got it, well.........there's a dispute within the medical community about how exactlyaspergers develops. personally, i feel that it's a hereditary, genetic trait. my hubby and almost everyone from his family ( mom, dad, and 4 siblings) have some traits, if not the whole deal. hubby is the only one with the diagnosis, though.....my MIL just got suspended from her job for making inappropriate statements to her boss ( she told him that when he looked back on his life when he was old like her, that he'd see what an a** he'd been ! LOL). my SIL can't figure out why anyone would get suspended for that..LOL
family dinner's are always quite interesting to say the least

Hi there Candace.

AS affects everyone differently. Maybe you could sit down and list the ways in which it affects your son and this would help you explain it to others. Do as much research as you can as it's a relatively 'new' condition.
As for feeling guilty, I believe AS is hereditary (There appears to be autistic tendencies in people on both sides of my family). I believe there are other factors involved during labour such as oxygen supply to the brain of the baby, but this is something you cannot have had any control over.
I hope this is of some help to you.

Social problems. Obsessions. Sensory issues and "stimming". Plus whatever comorbid disorders go along with ASDs. That's usually how I explain it if I go any further than saying "It's a form of high-functioning autism".

And ASDs definitely appear to be hereditary. More often it's from the father's side, but that's only because male Aspies seem to outnumber female Aspies.

I thank you all for your advice...I have thought of making a list of his 'quirks' at least that would help them deal with some stuff better....like when he follows or stands too close...some people get annoyed and yell when a simple ' move back a bit you are in my space' would suffice.

In our case, there were some problems during labor/delivery, but I also see traits strongly in my ex-husbands family.

I usually say it is a type of autism (not the most accurate definition here - but that is for those who have no idea what it is). Then you could say what relates specifically to your son - rigid thinking, sensory issues, outbursts. That way if someone doesn't know about it they don't need to be confused if you give ALL the characteristics of AS while they are looking at your son who may not exhibit some of those things. I think that is what leads some people to get confused when people explain autism in general terms. You can of course elaborate if they show an interest. I might refrain from giving someone a detailed list of your son's quirks though unless there was a reason for that - like for a babysitter or teacher. I have OCD also and it is kind of insulting to hear other people talk it because you know they are thinking it is strange. So, you might not want to go around with a list of "do you want to know about all the weird things my son does". I don't know how old he is but at some point he might not appreciate it so much.

I most likely have AS myself (I was diagnosed around the spectrum as a kid because no one really heard of AS back then).

That is sort of what happened with me. And it was mentioned that it was "probably a major factor." Though I was diagnosed with something else at the time, for AS was never used in America back then.

- Ray M -

This was one of my son's biggest social problems in his earlier years. Teaching him to put his arm out, and that he has to stay at least that far away from other people, has made a huge impact.

As far as genetics, my husband is either as/hfa, we don't have a dx at this point, and his father and brother certainly have some qualities even if they aren't on the spectrum. My father in law has literally thousands of dollars tied up in trains in his basement, trains are also something my son perseverates on quite frequently - it is his "boomerang" perseveration. He'll latch on to new stuff, but always goes back to the trains.

His delivery was uneventful.

If there were also obstetric complications, keep an eye out in future for Nonverbal Learning Disorder, too. About 40%-60% of Aspies have that as well and it's thought to be due to some form of brain damage. I think for some reason we're highly susceptible to complications before, during, and shortly after birth. These can sometimes cause mild brain damage.

Not that you want to label your son with everything in the world. But it's always good to get a clear picture of his talents and deficits in order to help him navigate life better.

My husband and I started an AS support group last year and I just recently had some personal cards (they're like business cards) made up for our group to hand out to those who want to know more about AS or for when we're in one of those uncomfortable situations in a public place. It basically says, "Thank you for your understanding! My child has Asperger's Syndrome and we enjoy going out like any other family. I hope we haven't disturbed you too much. Please go to www.aspergers.com to learn more about Asperger's. Thanks!" It also lists our support group's name, website and contact information.

Otherwise, with friends and family, I too use the "It currently falls under the Autism Spectrum Disorder" (altho there is some debate among medical professionals as to whether it should be in a catagory all its own) to help them understand. I also tell them that unlike classic autism and HFA where people have trouble with verbal language but not so much with non-verbal language, it's usually the opposite for those with AS. Those with AS usually have great verbal skills (the kids are sometimes refered to as "little professors") but not-so-great non-verbal skills (reading body language and facial expressions, understanding social cues and social rules, etc.). I also say he may seem to be socially inept due to how his AS manifests itself (conversation limited to one topic of interest/obsession, talking very loudly when not necessary, overly sensitive to smell, black and white thinking/understanding, need for rigid routine/schedule, etc.). I just went thru an explanation today, as a matter of fact. We've found that most people haven't heard of AS and are genuinley surprised by and interested in what you tell them.

There were some complications with my pregancy with our son. I had horrible vertigo which caused morning sickness to last into the sixth month then came back after his birth off and on for the next year and a half. Our son was also breech so I had to have a c-section. I also believe genetcis plays a part as I have a brother who exhibits some AS traits and my husband's ex believes she sees some mild AS traits in their daughter (my step-daughter).

Good thread! Interesting to read everyone's posts!

God bless you guys!

I bought a book for my son (11yrs old) its called... "Can I tell you about Aspergers Syndrome" I really liked it. I bought it to help me explain AS to him. I cant recall the author though...