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My daughter is now 18 years old .Legally an adult she has AS .She is currently planning a trip to california alone.We live in the UK .I could not afford to go even if she wanted me to which she doesn't. Naturally i'm scared for her .I know nothing about travelling in your country and feel she may be overwealmed.How easy or difficult would a sole teenager find it. Is it safe? She very intelligent but not always streetwise. am i right to be so concerned. She's stubborn sometimes and tends to ignore me if i'm negative.

Ca is really big, 424,232 km to the UKs 244,820 km² - so, answers will vary.

I think it will all depend on her prior planning - safety, overwhelm.... all of it can be planned properly. If not planned, then I think it could be very difficult. If travel to CA is her "interest" I would imagine the planning is pretty thorough?

She will probably be fine... I feel this, because when I was 18, I would not have been able to travel alone at all. If she is taking the initiative to do it, then I would not worry too much. If someone had suggested when I was 18 that I take a trip to the UK alone, I'd be hysterical.

mutti

You are absolutely right to be concerned. There are aspects of travelling abroad that are dangerous for any sole 18 year old aspie or not. If she hasn't, as Kuailuamom suggested, planned the trip very thoroughly and shared those plans with you, she is in danger. There are websites that offer guidance on how to keep children safe while they are travelling. Knowing where she will be and when is important. I recently read an article in (I think) the Wall Street Journal about getting your travelling teen a credit card that you are co-signer on so you can track her transactions during her trip. You can go online and see what charges she is making and where she is making them. Also, buy a cheap pre-paid cell phone that will work over here so she can always get in touch with you. Try in the most positive way possible to get her to include you in on her plans. She may be 18 but it is so easy for a person to get in to trouble when travelling alone in a strange country.

Sorry, the article I was thinking of was in the USA Today

http://travel.usatoday.com/news/2010-06-27-tips-for-teen-travelers_N.htm

Its about teens going to Europe from the US but I think it is still quite relevant no matter which side of the Pond you are heading to.

I can see my AS son traveling on his own when he reaches 18. I can't live him living on his own, or doing all his own chores, or worrying about bills ... but I can see him intelligently planning a trip and behaving in a relatively safe manner on it. He's a good traveler, and he really enjoys seeing new things and new places.

I think the main trick for your daughter is to not allow herself to be talked into doing things and going places with people she doesn't know and has just met during her travels. Fortunately, my son wouldn't be interested in making changes to his plans just because some new "friend" suggested it, so maybe your daughter won't, either. As long as she sticks to her plans and her intended safety measures she will be as safe as any other traveler. Is it without risk? Of course not. But just stepping outside one's door carries risk and you can't avoid risk and still live life.

She should be able to have internet or cell phone access pretty much anywhere she goes, so making plans to have her contact you regularly should help ease your worries.

But you are still going to worry. As a mom, you're programmed to worry until you've passed on and no longer can.

But as someone who was once a teen - traveling to another country is like a rite of passage. You can't stop her from growing up and testing her wings.

I think she will do all right she at least speaks the language. When I worked for this temp service there was a British guy who was going to the university of Buffalo but he stayed over for the summer to see Buffalo, Toronto, and Rochester. My co-workers treated him better than me. He kept asking what I did to piss everyone off.

I'm in California. Where is she going?

I feel for you. My daughter is 16 and one of her special interests is Rwanda. She's adamant that she's going there for a year when she's 18. Sometimes she gets in a pickle getting the bus home from school and I have to sort it. What can I do when she is in Africa.

My advice would be to consider what could go wrong and prepare her for that. Make sure she knows what to do in any given situation and who to contact.

This thread is giving me palpitations.

When I was a bit older I went abroad for my studies.
Important for me were the preparations. I prepared the itinerary in enough detail; with schedules and numbers. I had some maps to quickly get somewhere and some foreign money. Also lodging was arranged.
When I got settled I got more out and about; but a good preparations helps to feel good when arriving in a strange country.

Thanks for responding .So far mainly positive .Her hopes are now a tour 16 days taking in Los Angeles Scottsdale Grand Canyon lake Tahoe San Franciso and some other stops. I am happier as she will be moving by bus .She will be organized if she knows she got a time table. Still in planning stage yet though

Hope she recognizes that is A LOT of territory to cover. Its about 400 miles from Los Angeles to Scottsdale for example. Probably would take 2-3 days or more by bus to get there. There are a lot of exciting places to visit in the Western US but she might want to narrow her focus a bit so she can spend more time enjoying her destination than sitting on a bus!

Good luck to her and to you and safe travels!

I think this is a great idea. I do this quite often with my son. For example, in preparing him for a backpacking trip I went over worst-case hypothetical scenarios with him like this: "Ok, you've become separated from the group, its freezing, there is no shelter, all around you is trees as far as you can see, and the sun is setting...what do you do?" And then let him talk through the problem-solving where he does most of the talking, but every so often I make a comment or suggestion. Been doing this with him since he entered school at 5, and mostly it eases my anxiety because it reminds me that he's got a good head on his shoulders, but I also think it helps him a little bit too. Good luck to you and your daughter!

Most of the best tourist places to visit in the summer in California are on or near the coast with the exception of Yosemite, Lake Tahoe, and the Colorado river on the Arizona border. The Colorado River is one of the biggest party spots in the state, but be warned that the temperature there regularly exceeds 110F and despite strict checks for people driving a boat while drunk there are still lots of alcohol related accidents there.

As for cities, most places along the coastline are pretty safe except for Oakland (which I would advise avoiding completely) and parts of Long Beach. If she goes to Los Angeles, she should stay in the areas that cater to tourists and even there she will need to be alert of her surroundings at night. Warn her not to venture out in LA for a cultural experience without someone who knows the area well.

If she likes the outdoors and wants to go camping, make sure she goes in a party that is armed.

If she goes in the winter to a ski resort, there really isn't much to worry about.

Well, if she just want to check out los angelos for a few days that would be fine. But I would be hesitant about grabbing a greyhound bus and going where it takes you. If she wants to travel, then she would probably do better to go with a guided tour. Perhaps something like this:

http://www.getamericatours.com/

There are a couple other companies which do the same thing. Just Google "tour bus", and california. Look through all the links, and you'll probably find a schedule you like at a price you like.

Any of the big cities have really good and really bad areas. I would recommend pre-planning and she should be fine. You mentioned "the bus". It is important to note that in California almost everyone has a car (aside from people who live in SF), so... the public transport busses are not often great. A tour bus will be fine (actually desirable). the public bus stations are often in the worst parts of town. I would not be happy with my 18 year old in these areas.


I have lived in California 41 out of my 43 years and have NEVER felt the need to be armed, or be with someone who is armed. We camp, drive, adventure .... all sorts of stuff. In addition, I don't even think I have run into anyone armed. I think that statement can sause someone to be unnessarily fearful.