My Self-Esteem has gone from non-existant to extreamly high, between the second week of December and Today. It was just a few days after Black Friday (December 9, 2005), that I've decided that I might as well nuture my Quriks and Obsessions, because nobody else in my Immediate Family were going to do so, except for my Little Sis and maybe my Nana. I've decided that I was going to stop shaking my head, whenever I'd look at my British things and try a little experiment on myself. I've decided to give myself the tender care that I was in desperate need of, and I've come to realize that the Routemaster is the thing about England that I love the most. Instead of crying over the Buses that I love very dearly, I've decided to let them live on , in My Heart, My Spirit and My World. I've culled out my humble little collection of just 4 Routemasters out of my China Cabinet and placed my lonley Buses in varoius locations, throughout my Bedroom. I became happier with each passing week, and I've started to love and respect myself more, as time went on. Now my Collection of Routemasters and very close Relatives to the Routemaster has more than doubled. I was in a bit of a pickle, when I was faced with having to sacrifice either my growing collection of these beautiful Vintage Buses, or the Stereo System that I hardly ever use. I've followed my Heart, and I took the Stereo off my Dresser to make the room for my Collection to accumulate to up to Four times it's current number. I find it enthralling how something as simple as a toy Bus has changed me into a whole new person. I don't crack nearly as many Austin Powers jokes, because I feel comfortable being the person that I really am, because I feel better about myself. I haven't appologized for being alive, since I've been able to let the real me fly out of my Blue Velvet Cacoon.