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knowmadic
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15 Aug 2010, 5:50 am

Does anyone else tend to roll their eyes inappropriately in social situations?

Usually, I'm not even aware of this until I've been told "stop rolling your eyes at me!", which begs an explanation in work situations. Quite often it makes things worse, but i have no control over it.
I sometimes wonder if I'm doing immense social damage to myself in those times when noone even informs me of these (and other) inappropriate actions in conversation.
I think one reason behind why I do these jestures isn't that I want to seem so aloof or condescending in tone always, but that I am not confident in my interactions at said point in conversation and the eye-rolling jesture is an "...ugh, I don't even know where to begin to explain to you that I have trouble explaining to you about the ways in which I have trouble explaining things like this to people so..." Eyes roll :roll: at having to dwell on the same social skills issues over and over and over.

Maybe it's that I have so much trouble understanding how others can't see some elements in my life with as much focus and clarity as I can. Yet, others can see such a diversity of other things in what they assume is crystal clarity, but a knowledgeable aspie can seem quick to criticism and judgement of these unexamined lives they lead and catch them 'towing the line' or spewing cliches.

It's gotten me in a lot of seemingly avoidable confrontations with people and I wish I could stop it. Maybe it's one physical portrayal of Aspies' 'honesty to a fault'; and as many of us have such subtle facial expressions, it is natural that such a reaction would be noticeably out of our usual stoic demeanure.



CockneyRebel
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15 Aug 2010, 6:36 am

Only, when the girls talk about hair, guys and makeup. I should drive them crazy, and talk about how soft and cuddly looking, Mick Avory was in 64/65, when women start talking about hot hunks. :lol:


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Last edited by CockneyRebel on 16 Aug 2010, 12:13 am, edited 1 time in total.

devey
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15 Aug 2010, 7:02 am

I sometimes roll my eyes after unexpected eye contact with someone so it seems to be like a defence mechanism. Does this happen with you or does it happen more generally?



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15 Aug 2010, 7:54 am

Sometimes.... Normally when I'm in a really irritated mood and somebody said something that bothered me (which might rarely be the case).


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Guitar_Girl
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15 Aug 2010, 7:59 am

Yes. I hate when I do that because people get upset and I don't mean it. Same goes for "angry faces" CANT STAND THAT ONE!! ! I DON'T MEAN IT, TEACHER!



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15 Aug 2010, 8:23 am

I do it all the time to my girlfriend and she hates it. The other thing is that I might be just looking at her face to try and guage what she is feeling. Then she sais to me "what was that look for" leaving me dumb struck, not knowing what to say I usualy end up saying I don't know what it was for. Which is the truth. I have no idea what my own body language is saying. But I know quite often I disagree completely with what someone is saying or I am just plain bored with the conversation. I hate people who blab on about nothing in particular.



pgd
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15 Aug 2010, 8:26 am

knowmadic wrote:
Does anyone else tend to roll their eyes inappropriately in social situations?

Usually, I'm not even aware of this until I've been told "stop rolling your eyes at me!", which begs an explanation in work situations. Quite often it makes things worse, but i have no control over it.
I sometimes wonder if I'm doing immense social damage to myself in those times when noone even informs me of these (and other) inappropriate actions in conversation.
I think one reason behind why I do these jestures isn't that I want to seem so aloof or condescending in tone always, but that I am not confident in my interactions at said point in conversation and the eye-rolling jesture is an "...ugh, I don't even know where to begin to explain to you that I have trouble explaining to you about the ways in which I have trouble explaining things like this to people so..." Eyes roll :roll: at having to dwell on the same social skills issues over and over and over.

Maybe it's that I have so much trouble understanding how others can't see some elements in my life with as much focus and clarity as I can. Yet, others can see such a diversity of other things in what they assume is crystal clarity, but a knowledgeable aspie can seem quick to criticism and judgement of these unexamined lives they lead and catch them 'towing the line' or spewing cliches.

It's gotten me in a lot of seemingly avoidable confrontations with people and I wish I could stop it. Maybe it's one physical portrayal of Aspies' 'honesty to a fault'; and as many of us have such subtle facial expressions, it is natural that such a reaction would be noticeably out of our usual stoic demeanure.


---

Eye rolling

Am not familiar with the idea of eye rolling in limited contexts such as social conversations.

Am aware of involuntary eye rolling/eye movements which are associated with areas such as:

ADHD Inattentive
Mild nystagmus
Staring
Reading difficulties
Tracking a baseball during a pitch
Tracking a baseball after it's been hit
Tourette (tics)
Involuntary eye movements which can be associated with petit mal/absence and so on

Other

...

Eye Tracking - Stable Tracking vs Darting Eyes

Recall comments made by C. Thomas Wild about ADHD Inattentive about tracking a bouncing ball above words to a song as they appear on a movie screen and how a FDA appproved medicine, Tirend (contains caffeine - 100 mg/other ingredients), temporarily stabilized eye tracking for him and allowed him to process visual input a little better (not a cure). Source: the How To (understand) book. Wild's comments about vision referred to vision all day long, not in only social conversations. Other comments included reading speed, reading comprehension, perceiving how water looks on San Francisco Bay when the winds increase, the tide changes, etc., visual acuity, 2D vs 3D vision, motion perception during volleyball, baseball. attempting to high jump a three feet plus bar, etc.



Last edited by pgd on 15 Aug 2010, 8:58 am, edited 1 time in total.

OneStepBeyond
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15 Aug 2010, 8:34 am

no but i do raise my eyebrow(s) alot. i just cant blimmin help it



pgd
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15 Aug 2010, 8:50 am

OneStepBeyond wrote:
no but i do raise my eyebrow(s) alot. i just cant blimmin help it


---

Do relate to the idea that some persons tend to wear their responses to conversations openly on their sleeves so to speak, that is, some persons can involuntarily raise their eyebrows and so on in conversations where something said clashes with how they feel about what was said/whatever.

There's a term poker face where good poker players can repress facial expressions to the cards they receive vs other poker players where the cards they receive show up on their faces.

There's also the old card game called "Old Maid" which rewards the person who can suppress facial cues/body language they have that card and wish to give it to another player.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Old_maid_(card_game)



marshall
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15 Aug 2010, 12:00 pm

I don't roll my eyes but I sigh a lot and that can be interpreted the same way.



jojobean
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15 Aug 2010, 12:16 pm

maybe you need to notify your co-workers etc that you dont roll your eyes to be rude...but because you are trying to think how to communicate... you are rolling your eyes at yourself, not them. A little communication with those around you about the subject will do wonders for you.


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devey
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15 Aug 2010, 12:30 pm

OneStepBeyond wrote:
no but i do raise my eyebrow(s) alot. i just cant blimmin help it

I also do this



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15 Aug 2010, 12:46 pm

I try not to, I will raise an eyebrow and give a quizzical expression, it would be kind of rude to roll your eyes, at least thats how I was raised



knowmadic
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15 Aug 2010, 12:47 pm

Quote:
"what was that look for"


I hate being asked that! Sometimes I just commit to whatever "look" I must've made and carry on with acting frustrated even when I'm not, purely because my face led me there. "Can't turn back now. I'm supposed to be angry!"



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15 Aug 2010, 3:02 pm

I know that the movement disorder I have (which can go along with autism) has various parkinsonian features including involuntary eye-rolling. (Very different from eye-rolling in response to emotion.)


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15 Aug 2010, 3:12 pm

I do the same thing it is purely unintentional more lile a reflex because it does seem to fit in with the situation I am in, It always makes me feel bad, in a way equivalent to being brutally honest.

Sometimes though I do wish every one would be completely honest all the time like in that movie invention of lying because I have a hard time picking up on things.