Beating myself up over littlest mistakes

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I usually keep my temper in check, especially around other people, but nothing sets it off faster than the tiniest mistake. If I drop a piece of food on the floor, I routinely curse at myself, or call myself a slob. Or if I start going downstairs without whatever it is I came up for, I call myself a moron.

Yesterday I left a pen in my pocket when I did the laundry and it stained a pair of slacks. I'm trying everything to remove the stain but will probably have to buy new slacks. It's near impossible to forgive myself for this, because a few days before, I'd reminded myself to check my pockets, knowing I'd left the pen there, and then I didn't. The voice in my head says, "Well, you deserve what you get."

I know this is completely irrational and it's unrealistic to be perfect. I know negative self-talk just makes things worse and if I treated another person like I treat myself it would be considered abusive. But I guess my mind is convinced it can "train" itself to be less error-prone by being over-critical. I have been this way for years and years.

Does anyone else experience this? Have you successfully broken your habit of self-criticism, and if so, how?

I beat myself up like that every time I stuff up.

One suggestion is to use logic. Basically every time you critisise yourself you come up with a logical reason as to why the negative self talk isn't correct.
EG. "I am the worst person ever"
Rebuttal "Hey how can forgetting your homework make u worse then all the serial killers?"

U have to keep reminding yourself that "Hey its ok" "Humans make mistakes"

Yeah. Usually it's to do with low self-esteem or perfectionism.

as the above poster said you have low self-esteem, i have the same problem and as soon as i think to myself gee somebody loves me and my efforts are not in vain suddenly those demons vanish

i do the same thing to myself all of the time. honestly, it started with my parents - to them, i was a klutz, an airhead, a ditz, etc... so now i tell myself similar things (well, i've gotten better with therapy. but i still do this sometimes).

I don't, but I family enforces that I do...

Those who say it's low self-esteem, I think that's a symptom, not a cause.

The CBT approach has never worked on me. Of course I know my thinking is flawed, but drilling a counter-argument, while logical, doesn't seem to change my thought patterns.

It would make sense if I had super-strict, critical parents, but I wouldn't say I did, at least not as far as, "Clean up dat mess!" or "Put away yo laundry!" I really don't know where it came from.

it is true that the overly critical voice doesn't always respond to logic.

Yeah, I'm always really hard on myself too, but it depends on the situation. If it's a (small) mistake I've made constantly over and over again, I kind of just think "Bah, I screwed up again, oh well!" I'm really bad at beating myself up over things that may happen, even if there's no basis for them occurring.

And in the rare cases when they have occurred, I was never prepared properly anyway. Haven't had any success at taking it easy, moments of clarity are usually overshadowed by obsessive thoughts instead. I'll overdo it in either direction.

I do the same thing, as well. If somebody points out a little mistake that I've made, I'll beat myself up, for days. I might even beat myself up for a week. The thing that I find helpful, is reading the bits and pieces of the book, 'Don't Sweat The Small Stuff', that apply to whatever it is that I'm dealing with, at any given time. That helps me out, a lot.

Spending enough time absolutely depressed "short-circuited" my inner judge: I was emotionally paralyzed by all the self-criticism, couldn't function anymore, blamed myself for not functioning, becoming even more emotionally paralyzed, etc... The consequent suicidal feelings finally convinced my inner judge he was not helping me.