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zeldapsychology
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06 Sep 2010, 9:16 am

I worked at Mcdonald's for 3 months and HATED IT! Not being in college affected me to the point of a part-time 4hr. job I'd go cry in the bathroom for 30min.- an hr. Then compose myself and back to work. I am doing a Business Ethics course and a student mention being a manager of Gamestop and how there practices are bad. and said Welcome to the Real World. I don't like the Real World (The show OR LIFE itself) That's why I'm back in college to get a degree for a job I enjoy but I wonder does a job have to be hard/scary/"real world" etc. or is it possible to find a job you love? IMO if you are degree focused and do what you love than you are good. What are your thoughts?



mgran
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06 Sep 2010, 9:22 am

I had such a terrible experience with my last job that I really don't think I can face another one just yet. I would be waiting for others to attack me, or me to screw up, whichever came first. I'm sure other aspies can relate to that.



Prksrbrt
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06 Sep 2010, 9:48 am

I worked at Mcdonald's for 6 months and hated it as well. Now I work in retail which still stresses me but ive learned to zone out before helping people, it keeps me from getting too stressed out.



Peko
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06 Sep 2010, 10:14 am

I was until I got my first legit job last summer. They barely had me do anything and I got paid...


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Logan5
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06 Sep 2010, 5:49 pm

Zelda, I wish I could tell you that if you study hard you will definitely get a job that you love, but life seldom goes according to plan. This is true for everyone. Also, every job has both its good and bad aspects. There are few people in this world who get paid to do something they love. For most people, the job is just a pay-check. C'est la vie.

I am not very good at putting an optimistic spin on things, so instead I recommend you rent the film "American Splendor" < http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0305206/ >.



Erisad
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06 Sep 2010, 6:15 pm

I'm more afraid of the interview process than the job itself. >.<



DoniiMann
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06 Sep 2010, 6:30 pm

I'm afraid too. It's funny, I would do a job in a voluntary capacity and feel nowhere near the same stress as if the same job was paid. I think it's an authority/expectation thing. Volunteer bosses aren't usually so overbearing as work bosses.

As a kid I used to get dumped on by teachers, clergy, bosses, and I just fear authority figures in work places. And I fear not doing a good enough job. It may also be that there's nowhere to run to. Unless you quit, there's just the workplace, and will be again tomorrow and the day after. It robs me of my autonomy.


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Ahaseurus2000
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07 Sep 2010, 6:25 pm

my fears are from being out of work for so long.

"menial" jobs are the most exploitative. I now refuse to take those.


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puddingmouse
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08 Sep 2010, 9:00 am

Erisad wrote:
I'm more afraid of the interview process than the job itself. >.<


Absolutely. I find it hard to even lie on the psychometric personality tests they sometimes use - let alone lie about how great I am face-to-face with someone.

If I want a more fulfilling job, I have to keep trying, though.



Pistonhead
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08 Sep 2010, 10:14 am

Kinda yeah. I just don't like my work being too boring or demanding.


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Erisad
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08 Sep 2010, 1:06 pm

puddingmouse wrote:
Erisad wrote:
I'm more afraid of the interview process than the job itself. >.<


Absolutely. I find it hard to even lie on the psychometric personality tests they sometimes use - let alone lie about how great I am face-to-face with someone.

If I want a more fulfilling job, I have to keep trying, though.


I know right? I know I'm a good worker but I suck at selling myself to the employer. I hate talking about my skills in a bragging sort of way and I just want the resume to speak for me. I know they do interviews to weed out the psychopaths and stuff. I still don't like it. >.<



ania
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08 Sep 2010, 4:34 pm

I'm also scared of getting another job, and it's because of the people and coworkers, not the job itself.

My first job lasted less than 3 months too, at Target (5 years ago). I was a photo lab person there, and I liked doing the actual work with the machines, but the coworkers and customers were a pain. I was expected to smile all the time too and kept having comments that I wasn't even though I thought I was; whatever. Then I was yelled at for 10 minutes straight by some customer over something I had no control over and they perceived it as my fault, and I had no back-up from the security or managers that were staring. I had a lot more bad things happen in that job, at least it's in the past.

The last 2 jobs that I had took my anxiety to very high levels. One was admin assistant (lasting 1 week), the other was a dental assistant (lasting 1 month). I was very lucky to get those jobs, but I didn't last in them; as much as I tried not to, I had panic attacks everyday in those jobs.

I am not sure how I got these jobs either, since I stumbled and stuttered my way through the interviews. It has been more than a year now since my last job. I'm not good at lying and saying how great I am either.

I think I was most successful at selling stuff on Ebay, but that was a few years ago. Now I'm not sure since a lot of things changed since then. :?



Plywood
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09 Sep 2010, 3:31 pm

I actually worked at McDonalds for 5 months then quit because I felt like I didn't learn everything fast enough and I got weirded out.



nova2012
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09 Sep 2010, 8:24 pm

I actually enjoy the interview process to an extent. The worst part to me has been submitting my resume to a bunch of different companies and waiting to hear back. It really is a numbers game--the more you send out, the more responses you'll get. And make sure your cover letter is good and sells your [relevant!] skill set in a plausible, yet impressive, way. Employers don't take kindly to unreasonable exaggerations/embellishments and, of course, lies.

Getting the job, to me, has been the easier part. It's sticking with it afterwards that I just can't do. I get too bored and restless after a few months... which is why I'm now starting my own business. :D That, however, brings with it a whole new set of challenges! :P

If anyone's interested in some interview tips, I know these are probably trite and cliche, but I still think they're worth reiterating, if nothing else:

1. Make eye contact as often as possible with your interviewer. I know how uncomfortable this can be for a lot of Aspies (as I sometimes have issues with this myself, particularly as far as knowing when to look away and stuff), but it's absolutely essential. Otherwise, you project timidity and low self-esteem. If anything, you want to air on the side of "arrogance," if that makes any sense. Seem like you really know your stuff--and strut it. If there's any avenue where this is particularly important, it's in the interview with your prospective boss/hiring manager/decision maker. So if you need to, save up all your energy for that meeting.

2. Come prepared. That means everything--how you're dressed, multiple copies of your resume (one for each person you will be meeting, and then add three or so just in case), a padfolio and notepad for taking notes and seeming interested (even if you're really not, it demonstrates that you care), some breath mints, and a Xanax if you need it/just to feel more confident. :P Being prepared, and knowing you are, really is an effective antidote (or, at least, it helps a TON) for the immense anxiety that can immediately precede the interview.

3. Have some bullet points, questions for the interviewer, and a few anecdotes written down on your notepad. This kind of expands on #2, which is the importance of being prepared. But I think it deserves its own bullet point because it's something few people actually do and it really makes a huge difference, both to your own self-confidence in the interview room, as well as with the perception of you by your interviewer. The bullet points include important talking/selling points/accomplishments that you can share with the interviewer, and anything else you feel worth mentioning (you wouldn't believe how even after having rehearsed these in your mind/aloud the night before, they can all evaporate spontaneously the next day when you're face-to-face with the person who has the ability to decide your "fate," as it were). The questions should relate to things you'd like clarification/elaboration on related to the company, its culture, and the job, as well as growth potential to indicate your enthusiasm and interest. The anecdotes should be casual but drive home the thesis that you really are the right person for the job, and the firm shouldn't even consider anyone else! Talk about specific instances in which you have performed/incorporated a skill/task/ability that could somehow be construed as relevant to the position at hand. They should be results-oriented and emphasize how you made a difference to the organization/person for which you were doing it. These anecdotes will really go a long way in establishing your credibility and will add an element of humanity/personality to what's often a very tedious process in the eyes of the interviewer(s).

4. Utilize active listening and seem genuinely interested in and acknowledge what your interviewer is saying. This can be particularly difficult for Aspies/socially anxious people because it runs contrary to our very nature, but it's important in conveying what really is a "unique selling proposition" to the interviewer--setting yourself apart from your fellow candidates in a fairly easy and straightforward, yet highly effective way: appearing interested and a good listener. And as Aspies, especially, should be well aware of, there's nothing better than a good listener! :lol:

5. If you're concerned you'll be extremely awkward, practice in front of the mirror or with a trusted family member/friend. This might sound silly, but it really works. Even if you end up practicing and then executing in the actual interview by pure rote, it'll still come across pretty well--certainly leagues ahead of what it probably would have been otherwise. Pretend the interviewer is someone you really love and trust, and that they aren't the intimidating and inscrutable figure you've built them up to be. After all, they are still human and have a lot of the same concerns and problems that you do.

6. Arrive 20 minutes early to find parking and prep yourself mentally and physically (make sure your shirt's fully tucked in, belt lined up, etc.). Being rushed is one of the positively worst ways to arrive at the interview, because it will undoubtedly convey in your demeanor and mental state in the interview room. However, do not show up to the company until 5 minutes prior to the interview, or risk looking too desperate. 3-5 minutes is perfect, but don't cut it too close because you've gotta account for discrepancies in time-keeping, etc.

Anyhow, hope that helps from someone who's btdt and has some Aspie traits...


These are a just a few strategies that have personally



puddingmouse
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11 Sep 2010, 3:56 pm

Thanks for your tips, nova. I'll be needing them soon, as I'm trying to change to a better paid job and I had some positive phone calls from employers yesterday. :)

You say it's reitariting the obvious, but I need reminding that interviews are not the Spanish Inquistion, sometimes - and that they can be aced.



ChekaMan
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11 Sep 2010, 10:50 pm

I had one paid job;at first it was fine, but then my boss got on my back so much that I resigned after nine months. I don't even try to get a job now;no point.Who but scammers would want me?