Am I lucky to be an asocial aspie?

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As a child, I hardly felt lonely. I hated being with others most of the time and preferred to keep to myself. I played video games and read books for hours on end in my room. Being alone only bothered me when I was bored. I just needed something to stimulate my mind. Most of the time I don't feel the desire to socialize with others; I am satisfied in my own little world. My imagination was more exciting than the dull and dreary real world. My views on socializing mirror a classical autistic's perspective (or someone with schizoid personality) more than the typical person with AS. I feel sorry for aspies who desire to socialize and go out every night.

You are lucky. I think I had it in me to be an extrovert, but now I'm quite asocial too.

Me too.

I second the motion.

Sure, if you don't feel lonely, then life gets a lot easier if you just keep away from social stuff. Might be a problem if you had a job - most jobs need some level of social skill even if they don't make that clear in the advert, and you could be removed just for not getting on with the "rest of the team." But there are some jobs that don't need much social prowess, so if you can get one of those (or convince the benefit people you're unemployable), you can be a hermit forever and with a bit of luck nobody will bother you.

You might also find yourself with problems that could be easier solved by using a bit of "people skill." Often it's amazing how much co-operation can be secured just by going and seeing the person you want the favour from, and making them want to help you because they like you or sympathise with your predicament.

Probably.

I'm like you, and my childhood were the same. I spent it mostly behind the keyboard of playing with Lego and hardly ever had any friends over.

True, i want a girlfriend, but i'd appreciate it if she had her own place and that we lived apart.

Well, I think we are all like that sort of. On the rare occasion when someone wants to do something with me, I often just don't feel like doing anything, I'd rather stat at home and watch DVDs or surf the web. However, lately I've had a strong desire for a relationship, I guess since I've never had many friends, it's always been important for me to find a great girlfriend. I would much rather have a girlfriend, who has the same interests as me, than to have a ton of friends, because generally I just don't feel up to it. The only time I really like leaving the house is to go see a movie.

When aspies have the desire to socialize, it makes them more depressed when they can't find friends or when they get rejected or ignored. So they are better off when they don't even try and are just happy being alone like I am.

Yeah, I think not caring about social stuff makes things easier in a way.

I think you are quite lucky.

When I was a small child, I absolutely hated being alone. I always had to be with someone, even if we were just sat doing nothing, even if I did feel awkward and uncomfortable. Though I think I had separation anxiety back then, so it doesn't count.

From the age of 11 or 12 though, I became more and more of a recluse. I still expended a great deal of my energy into upkeeping friendships and staying 'normal' all the time. When I got to 13 and a half, I gave up. Trying to make friends or keep them- it was just too hard. From then on I only made friends with people who came to ME. I never approached anyone unless they wanted me too, which wasn't too often, but I still grew tired of having friends who were so eager. I have one good friend now, which is plenty enough, and because I only have one friend, I never go out and I don't hang around with anyone at school, my mother thinks I am too lonely and need to make more of an effort. What she doesn't know is that it is so tiring just to go to school, let alone try to fit in there!

It's good that you don't feel lonely, I don't, and to me it's like I can be who I want to be with no-one to try and act normal in front of.

Hmmm......I've been addicted to people ever since I can remember, and have always felt quite sad and anxious if I've had to spend more than a day or two without company, but for some reason this week I've been perfectly content to stay in alone every night. Haven't got much done, but I can't say I'm unhappy.....there really isn't a lot that I absolutely need to do. Somehow I'm no longer scared that I might remain alone for the rest of my life - maybe I've finally got the message that I can get company if I want it, without much trouble.

Yes, you're very lucky.

No.

This is like asking, "Are people who don't like orange juice luckier than people who do like orange juice???"

Being asocial comes with its own unique brand of associated challenges and you'd be wise not to forget that. Moreover, being asocial doesn't shield you from cancer, or car wrecks, or poverty. It doesn't mean you're any less prone to depression or anxiety, in fact, you may even be more likely to be anxious or depressed. You still don't have any friends to help you when you blow a tire, or to vouch for you on job applications.

Oh, and let's not forget the chronic disease called "company." Many people seem to think they have a god-given right to impose themselves on you, or demand your companionship. You also faced being accused of being a "bad person" because you don't want to be friends. You may even start to believe it if you hear it enough. Besides, for every hour you spend with people, you need at least twice that long alone in order to recover; what I wouldn't give to not constantly have to be in a near perpetual state of agitation because I can't get a solitary moment. I need a three hour nap to bounce back from a thirty minute walk through a busy mall. That's not "luck."

Lastly, I still have to go to work and pay bills. I don't get a "free pass" on life just because I'm asocial/asexual. There are plenty of problems in this world a person can suffer from that have absolutely NOTHING to do with friends or romance.

Ive never been lonely, and I cant imagine why.