12 Nov 2010, 9:57 pm
Hello,
I am new to this site, and talking about myself like this in lew of my AS is somewhat uncomfortable, so please bear with me. I do not really know where to begin, so I guess I will start with the mundane.
My name is Nathan, I am 22 years old, and was diagnosed with Asperger's when I was 18. My family always knew I had a "problem", and as a result, I mostly just struggled through it., never really knowing what it was. I always felt out of place throughout my tenure at school, and I kept my AS a secret through college: only me and my family knew I had it. I never used it as an excuse to hold me back, I always worked harder and put more effort into things that my peers could achieve with ease.
As a kid my fascinations revolved around many things during different periods, including dinosaurs, video games, and various science fiction franchises (alien, predator, etc.)
Although my peers knew there was something "wrong" with me, I was percieved as being funny, charming, and smart. I was and still am athletic and played baseball as well. This did not exempt me from ridicule or being made fun of however, but I mostly would just respond with wit and guile and brush it off, although it hurt me on the inside. I wore (and still wear) a "mask" when I am in public, because the reality is I just cannot be myself and be accepted. I pretended (and still pretend) to be someone who I was not, in order to be socially viable. Anyway, I was successful in College in the sense that I was involved in student groups and student government for many years and was elected to various positions. I got 2 degrees in Political Science and History not too long ago, and now I am in graduate school pursuing a master's degree in Policy Administration.
Besides that, I have worked hard in my life to overcome AS, and as such, it makes me mad when people in my family bring it up or remind me of it. I would like to think that I have grown past AS, but I do not think I have escaped it fully as of yet, for instance.
Social interaction seems tedious and unnatural to me. It seems like some strategic game, akin to chess, so I avoid it for the most part, unless I have somthing important to say.
I have a hard to time reading body language and reading between the lines. I still do not know when someone is trying to tell me something without actually telling me. I have gotten alot better with this over the years, but am still lacking.
I have a really hard time making new friends, as many people I have known have told me that I seem a bit odd, and that throws people off. Hopefully things will change once I get my Master's degree
I cannot hold a job for the life of me. Employer's and co-workers think I am wierd and even once I get a job, I have a hard time staying with it.
I am terrible with women and have absolutely no game. In fact, I have never even ever been out on a date.
And that is me in a nutshell I guess. 
happymusic
Veteran
Joined: 10 Feb 2010
Age: 49
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,165
Location: still in ninja land
12 Nov 2010, 10:22 pm
12 Nov 2010, 10:50 pm
Hello Nathan and warm welcome to WrongPlanet 
Thank you for sharing your story with us.
About wearing a 'mask', I think a lot of people wear a mask in social situations, whether they are AS or not.
Shadi
12 Nov 2010, 11:07 pm
12 Nov 2010, 11:20 pm
Hello again Nathan
I am sorry your family reacted that way, you would think that with family members it would be the other way around, that they would like you to be yourself and be comfortable with them.
I am also very new to this website, but I can tell you already that yes, here at least you can be yourself
Shadi
13 Nov 2010, 7:55 am
richie
Supporting Member
Joined: 9 Jan 2007
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 30,142
Location: Lake Whoop-Dee-Doo, Pennsylvania
13 Nov 2010, 6:01 pm
To WrongPlanet!! !
13 Nov 2010, 10:30 pm
14 Nov 2010, 10:32 am
22 Nov 2010, 3:46 am
Thank you for the welcome and the support, as I look forward to being a part of this community and contributing to it for some time to come 
