Knowing about Asperger's Damaging or Helpful?

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Does the mere knowledge of Asperger's damage or help your mental state and your life?

Basically before I heard about Asperger's, I was relatively happy with certain behaviors I had, most notably focusing for hours at a time on birds and Sonic the Hedgehog. I also thought I was socially interacting okay, though I didn't do it often.

Then I learned about Asperger's. Now such behaviors seem abnormal. I want to stop them. But along the way, I have become obsessed with mental health and Asperger's. Nowadays, I want to study birds more, but I get antsy and want to go back to the mental health site I go to a lot, or to read Wrong Planet. Also after asking people, my social life is indeed abnormal.

I can't stop wondering if I really have it. I have other things and I mostly don't focus on those.

I should leave it up to the mental health experts, but even they confuse me. Currently, my therapist thinks I have it, while I haven't discussed it with my psychiatrist.

I just want to be back to the state I was in earlier. I'm a unstable isotope that doesn't want to throw off a particle or two and return to a stable state, lol.

Most people with the condition seem to go through this stage, I lived in denial for 5+ years for similar reasons. You grew up in a world that believes everyone should be the same. Discovering your true identity shocks you, as you believed you were normal.

Its OK to be different, just be yourself.

For me, knowing about AS is very helpful. While I perceive the symptoms more clearly in myself now and I even have the impression that they have become stronger over the last two months, I also have a better understanding of what makes me different from most people and what some aspects of my behaviour mean.

I have always noticed I was different, even as child. I just could never say in which way exactly I was different. Another thing about myself I have known for a very long time is that some things in my behaviour and my personality are more pronounced on some days than on others and some of them seem to go through cycles of several weeks or months, so the current perceived increase of AS-related behaviour does not bother me that much. It's just one of the more difficult points of the ebbs and tides that have been a part of my life for a very long time. Eventually, this will abate and I will come to rest a bit more again.

Learning and reading about AS has helped me not only to figure out why my mind works in certain ways, but also to understand which aspects of my personality are the more problematic ones and what kind of help I would like to get for them. Since I figured out that it is AS with me, I have a much better idea what I should do to get a grip on my life and I have a much higher motivation to actually do things that will help me. I now understand that my lethargy is in part due to my AS and the depression I'm currently struggling with and I can fight it instead of being hampered in just about everything.

There is certainly people out there for whom it is more problematic to know they are on the spectrum, but I for one am just glad I finally found out what causes all those peculiarities most other people in my life don't share and that I now know what to read about to get some more information about myself.

I'm with Fluffy. (And not just because I wanted to say that. XD )
It's actually a relief to me to understand what's going on with me. I've tortured myself for decades, trying as hard as I possibly could to be normal or at the very least not stand out, and failing miserably. And I blamed it all on myself. I felt that I was weak and stupid and obviously a failure. But when I discovered that all these failures that embarrassed me so much that I couldn't even talk to anyone at all about them were because of AS, it took that huge burden off of my shoulders.

I'm still unsure about some things. It's hard for me to let go of the idea that I'm lazy. I don't like making excuses for things, and I'm not going to start acting like a jerk because I feel that I now have an excuse. But I do feel a huge sense of relief, and now I know what to do to make myself more comfortable and more productive. I definitely see that as positive.

I'm with Fluffy and Zen.

Knowing about AS is probably the best thing to happen to me in 2010. I mean, I knew about it in 2007-2008, but then I had a lot of denial. Weird denial where I hated Autism Speaks and got angry at poor portrayals of autistic people in the media, but still denial.

Like Zen I've spent decades trying to be normal, even though it was pretty much impossible for me in many ways and ultimately caused me more harm than good. Now, at least, I have a good idea of what was going on, and I can stop feeling worried and/or ashamed when I catch myself doing autistic things.

Knowing about Asperger's has been extremely helpful for me. It has helped me understand myself, my struggles, my life, other people's reactions to me etc.

I always knew that something was different about me. I knew that I had a lot of difficulties with basic things that most others seemed to find easy and were good at without much efforts, but the confusing part was that I was always a lot better than them at various other things. It didn't make sense. Meltdowns were extremely confusing and scary, especially since I didn't know what they really were or why they kept happening. I was confused and disappointed with not being able to pick up social skills like others. Many other symptoms caused me to wonder if something was wrong with me, and what it was.

I was pretty sure I had to have some kind of a disorder, but I worried that it might be something serious or something that could get worse, but I was scared of trying to seek help, because there was so much stigma about these things when I was growing up.

When I found out about Asperger's, it was like everything finally started making sense, and I felt a huge relief. I found explanations for so many things that I had always wondered about. I started understanding my life and my circumstances so much better than ever before. I very soon started accepting it as a normal part of me, both the good sides and the bad sides of Asperger's. Instead of worrying or feeling like a failure for not being able to do some things the NT way, I've been able to use my energy on learning about Asperger's and understanding the way it affects me and my life. I've learned to use my strengths to compensate for my weaknesses, and I've learned not to blame myself for things that are out of my control or feel ashamed of being different.

I'm happy that I found out about Asperger's syndrome. It would have been nice to know about it earlier though. I was in my twenties when I found out about it and had never received any understanding, support or help with my struggles, which had made my life unnecessarily hard and miserable up to that point.

Really helpful. The last 50 years suddenly started making sense.

Definitely helpful.

Knowing that I have Asperger's helped me a lot and had made sense of all that has been happening throughout my life.

When I first found out I had AS I did a little reading into it and agreed that I had it but didn't really give it much thought. It's only really since joining WP that my eyes have been opened to just how it affects my life and I'm noticing it more and more. The thing is, I'm at a point right now where I can't figure out if it's just that I see it more because I'm looking for it or if it's worse. For most of my life I didn't know I had AS, but I subconsciously developed coping methods. Part of my mind is suspicious that, now that I realize why it's all happened, I'm starting to reverse some of those trends I developed to cope. I can't really point to anything specific, it's just that sinking suspicion in the back of my mind.

It has been helpful for me and it helps me to share my story with others.

Very helpful.
Now I know why, after all those years of flailing around without understanding or hope.

It's like I've only ever had one piece of a jigsaw - and now I've been given all the other bits too.
I'm still putting it together, but it's so much easier when nothing is missing.
(turns out that the jigsaw is a picture of me - real me; much better than who I thought I was)

I am relieved to know as I though I was a freak all my life and despite working with several professionals they did not suggest it so it remained a mystery until quite recent. I think for me now that I know it is coming up for me more and more because it is a sudden awareness and I now keep stumbling across how many areas of my life it affects. Before this I believe I had developed reasonably good coping skills or I would guess at stuff, ruminate for days on end (sometimes months) trying to figure out specific incidences, now I am more easily able to say, 'Oh, that's because you don't understand social agenda's' for example.

I just got caught out again at age 51, my more NT friend was exasperated with me yet again for the nine millionth time as she said 'Didn't you get what that person was about!' ARRRG, no I didn't but at least now I know it's because of the AS and for the first time was able to tell her that these were the issues I had all my life. It brought a new understanding to both of us as we have known each other for many years. I feel I should move in with her so she can keep tabs on me, too bad we live in different countries.

For me it was a sudden awareness as I had many things come up for my son (13) and I was trying to figure out his life so he could get help, when all of a sudden I realized it was me too. My NT friend however thinks it is weird that I should suddenly believe I have AS and I can understand that as I have kept many of my struggles to myself and not talked about it to anyone as I feared further rejection and ridicule.

If it was not for the diagnosis I would still be thinking I was crazy or learning disabled. My psychologist who did my testing told me he saw no signs of a learning disability I felt vindicated after all those years of telling teachers, counclers, and my parents I did not need special education. The thought of me being learning disabled is what kept me from going to school or even to try to do good in school. I wish they understood what was wrong with me when I was in school durring the 70's and 80's perhaps I would be a different person today.