AS is a DISABILITY!

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Let's face, people like us are as incapable of finding love as a paraplegic is incapable of walking, and we're just as helpless to change it.

I totally agree. I don't liken us to a humanoid Prius for nothing. A Prius is dull, awkward, boring, ugly, and exhibits quite a few similarities in how it behaves mechanically like an aspie does.

It depends on the degree of AS. There are extremes on any official or unofficial spectrum of behavior, and the extreme sides usually have more difficulty coping.

I seem to cope pretty well in all areas, except for dating.

...to you.

I admire the Prius for the intelligence in its design. The Dodge Ram will always be the vehicle of fools in my eyes.

Last edited by Biokinetica on 08 Jan 2011, 3:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Don't give up hope. It's not impossible at all because there are success stories out there. Obviously it is very possible you just have to believe and never give up.

QFT

I get kind of annoyed with the (sincere and very well-meaning) people who say "lose weight", "Get a job", "buy nice clothes", "join a club", etc etc etc etc etc etc etc

Like those things are going to cure your Aspergers.

Take it from someone who has done those things as far as they can possibly be done, it may spark a little initial interest, but once your AS becomes apparent they can't get away fast enough...

F*ck.

Just f*ck.

And the only cures are either self-isolation or suicide. Trust me, jumping in front of a bus or a BART train sounded tempting a few times.

That's a depressing statement.
I disagree - no-one is incapable of finding love.

Honestly... at this point I'm seriously wondering if ANYONE is capable of it, and if most people are just a lot better at faking it than we are. The idea that in a population of over six billion people, there is ONE person for everyone, and a good chance of them even being on the same continent, let alone just happening to magically find each other... well, people can call me a cynical pessimist who "thinks too much", but I find it all absurd, and I think I've dealt with enough of it for one lifetime.

If I don't find someone by my 30s, I might as well off myself.

I've been there too, those thoughts happen but we both don't take them seriously.

When I have days like that (today, for instance) I remind myself that there are a million other things worth living for than just having a girlfriend.

There are so many things I like to do and places I like to go that I just get out and do them for awhile and then I'm ready to bash my head against the relationship wall again.

A lot of times I'll just load a bunch of waypoints in the GPS, gas up the Jeep, and hit the desert for no other reason than it's a blast for me - totally changes my perspective and gets my mind off what in the bigger scheme of things is not that big a problem - I live better than 90%+ of people on this planet, I'm actually pretty damn lucky despite being a zero with the ladies.

Works for me anyway.

I went on a "flashmob" type of a bike ride through San Francisco last night, that helped take my mind off things. Too bad it's cold outside, but I'll be in Tahoe for 2 days tomorrow night.

Cool! (no pun intended) just what the doctor ordered I think - have fun...

Well just as it's possible for a paraplegic to get around (with a wheelchair), so it's possible for an aspie to find love. It doesn't necessarily mean one is going to live a fulfilled life though...

True. We do f**k it up all the f*****g time.
I do anyway. It's easier to try not to change and just stay at home.