finally got off my butt....

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final got off my butt and made an appt for daughter to be evaluated. have been putting it off because of the $$$$, but due to an incident last weekend, i just can't anymore.
we went to the book store to get a car manual for my vehicle. daughter was told that that was the only reason we were going to the bookstore. while we were there, she started to fixate on a Cat Encyclopedia. When i said no, she said please...i said no, she said but it's about cat's, i need information on cats. i said, no. her voice started to elevate and she then said that she wasn't leaving the store until we bought the book. we walked out of the store, and she ran after us screaming. the tantrum lasted 30 minutes~ screaming, kicking, flailing...I NEED INFORMATION ABOUT CATS!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !
we've also noticed how she takes what people say Very Seriously...when i talked to her about this, she said that she doesn't know how to not take people seriously all of the time.

how old did you say dd was-has she has she had any interventions. sounds like as or something akin to it. did you do the childbrain.com quizz for her?

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we've also noticed how she takes what people say Very Seriously...when i talked to her about this, she said that she doesn't know how to not take people seriously all of the time.[/quote]

this is a typical AS trait.. my son does the same thing.. he has no way to see the gray matter.. what people tell him is the "law". good luck on the eval.. i was shopping with my son one day and he spotted a flashy watch.. he loved it and tried it on. he said Mom look.. Cool.. I said "yeah Ry its got your name written all over it" he proceeded to look for his name on it and then was upset because he could not find his name on it. so I as a parent also don't think before i spout out. i think the real chore is trying to convince all the people around us to not talk to him as I did. but to speak as in black and white.

Ster why does it cost you to have your daughter evaluated? would this not come under health insurace? or maybe the local autusim society where you live could help you out on the cost if it does cost you. I am sure that they would be helpful.

my daughter is 7...and try as i might, i have not been able to find anyone that takes insurance. most of the docs around here believe in supply & demand~ they can afford to not take insurance because the demand is so high....the insurance companies do not make it very easy for mental health providers either..they question every decision a provider makes.
the dr doing the eval has at least agreed to help me submit the paperwork to insurance...

Ster this is horrible. here in NYS we are trying to submit Ryan's law. its where the health insurance providers must provide persons with mental health coverage. I know all too well about this because my husband has anxiety disorder and the health insurance we pay for ($225 a month) will not cover mental health drugs or anything relating. so we managed to go thru the drug maker that he uses for his meds to give us free meds. i think that maybe the local chaper of Autusim society might help a great deal. there must be a way! health insurace companies to me are bigger than the gov't. keep on plugging along for your daughters sake. she deserves what any other person does.. HELP! and for the record I consider AS a physical issue not a mental issue. but they consider it a mental issue because of the effect of the brain. too bad...

In some states the insurance companies are allowed to deny coverage for autism related services due to some technicality also. We had two insurance companies - one for medical and the other for psychiatric and neither would pay for one neuro exam because of the codes the doctor used and the diagnosis he put in his notes. HOWEVER - We did have several exams and psychological testing covered, but the medical professionals have to be savvy as to what they can put down and what codes to bill under. Finding an online parent group in your area may help you get referrals or find out if other parents have had any success in getting testing covered.

And I don't really have an issue with the term "mental illness" in the sense of it being applied to ASDs because it is also used for OCD, anxiety, depression, bi-polar and other conditions that seem to have a biological cause. It is one thing to try and seperate it for insurance coverage purposes but I think it is better for neurodiversity in general to not try and distance each other from one group or another - espcecially since many with ASDs have co-concurring conditions falling under the catagory of mental illness.

thank you both for your replies. the dr takes credit cards, so hopefully we'll see some $ from the insurance company before the credit card bill comes in. just finished filling out miles of paperwork on her...heartbreaking to see it all on paper.
i love and accept her for who she is, unfortunately her peers do not. her school did little over the past year to help her. i mean, if every day you're writing on a students paper that their handwriting must be neater, and that she did not following directions when she draws pictures all over her papers~ don't you think there's something awry ? moreover, if she's misspelling common words like blue, and spelling words like reindeer correctly~don't you think that should be addressed ?
ahh well...another year...glad it's summer and she can just be herself. the dr has also said that he'll visit the school a couple of times during the year to make certain that her new teachers are following through with the reccomendations.

thank you both for your replies. the dr takes credit cards, so hopefully we'll see some $ from the insurance company before the credit card bill comes in. just finished filling out miles of paperwork on her...heartbreaking to see it all on paper.
i love and accept her for who she is, unfortunately her peers do not. her school did little over the past year to help her. i mean, if every day you're writing on a students paper that their handwriting must be neater, and that she did not following directions when she draws pictures all over her papers~ don't you think there's something awry ? moreover, if she's misspelling common words like blue, and spelling words like reindeer correctly~don't you think that should be addressed ?
ahh well...another year...glad it's summer and she can just be herself. the dr has also said that he'll visit the school a couple of times during the year to make certain that her new teachers are following through with the reccomendations.

Your daughter's school papers sound exactly like mine when I was a child. One positive thing you can look at is that she has a mother who truly cares and wants to help her. That will make a big difference. It sounds like you're doing a great job.

Ster my son too has that problem.. spells words that you would not think he could ut can not get the common ones down.. and then the handwriting.. yikes.. our school has been working hard with Ryan on this one. I had to remind them that the negative comments were not doing any good for any of us. Handwriting is an AS trait also. I had to remind them that As children are known to have horrible handwritin because of their find motor skills not being very good. they did wake up and see the light to a degree. the one thing that I have learned is that the negative comments the teacher puts on the paper makes the child feel like a bigger looser than he did before. i told my sons teacher that he struggles just to do what he does and the comments upset him.. Please do not let the teacher do this. remind her/him that she needs to find what the child did good and comment on that. I told her that if she has issues with his handwriting then she needs to speak to his special ed teacher and have her do what she is supposed to do and help him. My son was also denied occuptaion therapy in school. he was tested for aid and they denied him..i hit the roof! they compain that he needs to improve but deny him the services to help him improve. I know how frustrated you can get with the schools. its terrible. they put all the eggs in the parents basket but how can we do it when we are not there for the entire schoold day.. all we can do is tell our children before they leave for school is to do the best they can..Ster shake up their trees in school..

Colleen

fortunately, again, she's out of school for summer....the teachers comments were getting to the point of absolute ridiculousness...daughter would bristle at the mere mention of having to rewrite a number on her homework so that we could read it. i plan to definitely ask for OT services for this next school year~don't know that i'll get it, but i sure can try.
went out with a friend and her daughter last night to see fireworks, and it finally hit me how very differnt daughter is. i guess that i'm so used to seeing aspieness as normal, that it's hard to see what she does as not being "normal". sent the million forms into the dr today. it'll be another month befor the actual eval. still trying to figure out how to save $ so i don't have to rack up the credit card. any ideas greatly appreciated.

ster guess my only advice would be to contact the local autistic society to see if you can get any help from there. i know some drs work on a sliding scale to help u out. i know what you mean about seeing how different your child is to others. i see it often when i have my nephew who is the same age as my son.. vast difference thats for sure.

Colleen

thanks, colleen...will try checking out the local autism council

As far as saving money, I usually do simple stuff like use the library and other free places for entertainment and pack my lunches rather than buy them at work (I can make my own lunch for alot less than the $6 - $7 most places charge).

I am going to say this here and if it belongs in a different thread, please tell me. The US has a huge problem with mental health being on parity with physical health. I remember seeing this first in Rochester MN when a lady I knew slit her wrists and was sent home after the emergency room bounded the wounds because there were no psychiatric beds available. I wonder what would happen to a hospital if they told a cardiac arrest patient that there were no beds available. This issue is coming to a head here because of a case where the father of a 19yo tried to have is son admitted to hospital for delusional thoughts as well as plans to kill himself and his family. The hospital refused to admit him because of the lack of beds and he later went on to kill his mother and step-father.

Even if you get a bed, that does not guarentee continuity of care because many times, you are sent 100s of miles from your home. There are stories of people in the Twin Cities who in looking for care were transported as far as Bemidji MN. In fact, hospitals in Moorhead and routinely sending people to Fargo because it is easier to get care there (of course ND is complaining about it).

Unfortunately, the health system in the US totally a for-profit system. Mental health is not on the priority list of the system because of the stigma and the fact that a person with a mental health issue will need lifelong care which lowers the profits. Because the stigma is so bad, the insurance companies figure that they can deal with the few people who need it poorly without worry.

I am done with my rant for the day

My mom works at a Catholic hospital that is supposedly non-profit - and they have a psych ward there. One of the few hospitals that do. The problem is that with insurance that the hospitals have to pay and regulations it is expensive. And then they do become drop off centers for other hospitals in the area which uses up the already limited resources for the community. Therefore the majority of hospitals do not want to provide that kind of service. And the other issue is that there are so many who have psychiatric problems due to substance abuse too with limited space for those with psychiatric conditions. It is not uncommon for there to be dual diagnosis of SA/MI but those with chemical dependencies have different issues than those who may just have purely psychiatric issues. The bottom line is there is little money and from a business perspective - it is no wonder so many hospitals are fleeing from the responsibility of offering these sevices. Especially if they are for profit.

the US health system is quite a mess, and i'm not certain what the solution should be....... people are still so ignorant about anything to do with the brain~ be it mental illness, drug and/or alcohol addiction, mental retardation, autism, aspergers, etc........there is still such a stigma attached to any of these "impairments". i mean, when i take my students into the community
( they're SBD, SED, Aut, AS) the reactions we get are VERY mixed. parents pull thier children towards them like they might "catch it"...store owners look at us disdainfully and fret about the students breaking things. then there are the others who, i guess are well-meaning, but treat our students like they're all 2 years old~you know, the syrupy sweet talk and simple words.
i have a friend whose still so embarassed that she has a schizophrenic sister. she won't go anywhere with her. i have neighbors who are terrifically embarassed that they have a daughter who is bipolar. i just don't understand.
i truly believe that nothing will change until impairments are seen as just something that deserves medical attention. i also believe that it should be criminal to NOT take insurance . just as much as health care providers have issues with not accepting insurance, Insurance Compainies need to be a bit less anal about approving medically neccessary therapies. they also need to be less nitpicky about paying for procedures.i just finished paying my OB the $130 my HMO decided was beyond the approved budget for the procedure.