I consider myself an ex-christian (who else does?)

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I consider myself an ex-christian. I came to this decision about a month ago and it's for personal feelings. I've always been told God is always there to help you and He loves you. But I've never always felt like that. When I went to a fundamentalist private school til the last half of the 8th grade, love was the complete opposite of what I felt. The kids there were very intolerant and hypocritical. Despite always saying Jesus loves everyone, they would single out certain kids if they were different in interests and appearances. Anyone who was different was "un-cool". Even though they told me they liked me, I was often singled out and ignored like I didn't exist. They would at times pull tricks on me and never gave a second thought about it but if I ever pulled a little funny on them, they would act like I was the biggest as*hole on earth. They were also worse in their church sessions. They would believe everything they heard no matter how false it was. They couldn't follow their hearts and think for themselves. They had to rely on some million year old scriptures or a church leader who was in turn more like a cult leader. They did not know how to truly live and have fun.

These kids would also question the fact I felt depressed a lot. I've only recenly discovered it was partly from having asperger syndrome but it was mostly because I never felt accepted and I wanted to be treated kindly. They never understood that and told me Jesus loved me so I shouldn't feel sad and that there were plans to give me hope and a future. I resented being told that. I prayed to God constantly for a change but that never happened. Things kept getting worse and I wanted to leave the school. I got my wish and I now attend a public school which was the perfect choice for me. I reccomend going to a public school fully, never a private one.
I have so many more friends there and I'm much more accepted than I ever used to be.

But I don't think that was planned for me. No, not at all. I don't believe anything is planned for us and especially not by the Lord. If God had plans for us, why do we have the ability to question what is said in the bible? Why do we still have hard times? If these so called plans are to prosper and not to harm you, why do bad things still happen to us? Don't point out the hope part for me either. My aunt has been married twice with both husbands ending up dead. Her first husband commited suicide while the other died of radiation building in him from the Vietnam war. She's constantly suffering from mental health problems and overwhelming depression and has yet to recover from either. My grandma's brother broke his back and the medicine he had to take for it after his surgery left him with an allergy for bright lights (including sun light) and tomatoes. Also, my own living with asperger syndrome has not been an easy one and that is mostly why I gave up the christian faith. Some of my difficulties have improved but there are still some things I wish would disappear entirely and there are things I wish happened in my past that never did. I know you can't re-write the past but how can you feel complete when you have desires that are still yearning to be fulfilled?

The other reasons I gave up christianity is the hypocrisy of most christians I've met and also the corrupt televangelists and conservative christian right morons. They have a problem with the fact that people can follow their hearts and live happily doing what they want to do. But these christian right morons and fundamentalists resent that greatly and want it taken away. They want to inject their bias into the political system and regress instead of progress. Banning same-sex marriage, abortion, cutting women's rights and so forth is not progression since it's not moving forwards but backwards. A lot of these idiots also say God is the reason behind the natural disasters just because the acceptance of homosexuality or whatever and believe they can talk to him. If they are saying things like that and truly believe that, they are definitely insane. And they also have a bunch of people who follow them who are even more idiotic. These people are totally ignorant about the human mind and anyone with half a brain should realize that when someone is crazy, don't believe a word, not even a letter, they are saying. You can't prove God has a hand in natural disasters. Science has explained the causes behind natural disasters thoroughly and they have been happening for billions of years, even before life itself existed on the planet. We only see more of natural disasters because our communication has improved.
But to say God is the reason behind that is completely ridiculous. The way God is described does not fit within the confines of science so there is no way to prove He exists nor disprove Him either. If you say God talks to you, tell me when He is and I will come over to hear for myself. Their complete rebellion against common sense embarrassed me to be a christian and I don't want to practice the same religion the people who have hurt me practice. This also extends from a christian girl I had a crush on but she stabbed me in the back and severed our friendship. I also can not forgive a certain Baptist woman who insulted me just for being a fan of Ozzy Osbourne right in my face.

Faith and religion are certainly never going away but I don't have to tag along with it. You can have faith in God if you want to but it's something that doesn't work for me as of now. Faith and religion are terrible things in my eyes. It's extremely old and dated, it breeds debates that cannot be settled and it tears people apart inside. Something that was formulated when people didn't know any better and were ignorant beyond belief I don't think should be taken seriously today. I rather follow my heart. I want to think and do what I want instead of blindly following a religion just because many say it's right. Just because you are told something to be right doesn't mean it's right. What if someone told you it's right to jump off a cliff? I don't know if there is a God anymore but if there is one, I wish I could talk to Him and face to face. I don't care if anyone criticizes what I say and I don't intend to offend anyone with religious beliefs here. I just want to speak with my heart and I want my voice to be heard.

Hey dude send me a pm, we can chat sometime if u want... on msn or something...

I'm an "ex christian", I never fully "comitted" (in my mothers religion you have to be baptized to be considered "christian"), but it messed up my life really badly. and it left big wounds and scars because I was depressed and unhappy and found solace in the idea of PREDICTABLE, nice, loving an honest people that you find in religious communities... despite the fact that they are all nuts.

Normally I'd monologue like you, maybe I will later.. lol.

I'm surprised this thread didn't kick off some controversy. I'll send a pm when I have time.

Many years ago I too attended a private religous school through the 8th grade and then transferred to public school. Honestly, I didn't see much difference in the attitudes and actions of my classmates. Of course most of the kids in the private school were not there by choice, so maybe I should have expected that, but I thought it would be much different. It was not. Looking back now, I believe there was probably a higher percentage of "bad kids" in the private school compared to public..most likely because they were "forced" to be there.

Unfortunately, the private school I attended was more interested in teaching the Bible and making sure you dressed properly so my education suffered in some areas. Public school was a wake-up call as far as what my education in my previous years should have been.

I was raised to be Christian when I was growing up and did not question why, how, or for what reasons. As I got older I found out about different religions and asked these questions to myself, but never others. Now that I am much older and wiser and see some of the actions of people that label themselves as such, I must say that if that is what being a Christian is about then I guess I am one no longer.

Now, I still believe in a Creator no matter what you wish to call Him/Her, but to express such rigidity, absoluteness, and intolerance as some Christians do, I almost feel uncomfortable with calling myself a Christian or even saying that I was raised Christian. I follow my own code of conduct and beliefs now and would call myself spiritual (in that I still believe in a higher power) rather than religious.

I think it's also important to remember that religion, and most of those who follow one, are on a spectrum as well and there will always be those at both ends and everywhere in between.

Interesting topic, thank you.

i'm an ex-christian too, but my parents were never religious or pushing me to be religious, i just went to church because my best friend invited me along and his dad was the minister. anyway, as i got older i started questioning why i considered myself a christian. and my response was "i believe in christianity because i believe jesus died on the cross to save us from our sins, and that i believe he is the son of god". and after a while, i decided that i didn't believe in that sentence anymore.

i also think, however, that religion and belief in god can be separate things, depending on your own concept of god. and one place that any religion fails is the fact that everyone's perception of what "god" is is different, and you can't apply the same characteristics and values to every person's god.

Sometimes bad things happen to us because God wants to build something up in our lives. I think that Christianity is very one-on-one with God, or that God treats people as individuals, and so others may have different problems than other people, and others may have different sources of joy than some other people. God uses different things to make people grow. I do hate it sometimes though when churches try to push extremely strict religion and tradition down peoples' throats or walking around with iron rods so to speak, and that just makes some people turn away and feel crappy and stressed out sometimes; as well as separating people out and taking favor in other people just because they're more popular or good looking and other stupid things like that that don't even matter at all. But I do pray for strength when I'm thinking that I can't make it through difficult times such as those (like at school), and I admit that it can be extremely difficult at times. Being a Christian is not an easy task while living on earth, but in my opinion it's definitely worth it, even if some people may dislike me for who I am. I think that God is a god of relationship rather than a god of extremely strict traditions (like some churches say that it's bad to use electric guitars in church! Or at least my cousins' church, since they're separatist/non-denominational or something like that) and fancy clothes and popularity circles.

I think the overwhelming majority of Atheists/Agnostics are former christians.

Things that make you go Hmmmm.

Can I ask how you feel about the current stigma attached to being labled as/labling yourself as a Christian?

From both directions...I mean I feel as if I am discarded from both the "hardcore" Christians, and the believers of a "God" but may be from a different religion. There is no in-between with some who practice religion.

I find the similarities between different religions fascinating, yet the hardcore differences between them perplexing. Sorry if any of this is incoherent.

Edit....

Also wanted to ask why you find it to be not an easy task and for what reasons is it important to you? And I understand if you do not want to answer.

Religion by its very nature is not an "in between" thing, the more secular your religion, the less relevant and religious you are. Most secularized religions disband and people end up wondering... "why am I following a 2000 year old book full of myths and out-dated moral precepts?"

Christian-dumb has too much to answer for. It's doctrines are contradictory and confusing. Many of my questions were never answered.

Therefore, it was illogical to stay a Christian. I went on to make a new philosophy and belief system based on logic and reasoning. I will soon post the details on this category.

^^^Don't use doltish terms like "Christiandumb". It makes you look like a belligerant 3 year old who needs to be smacked upside the head for disrespecting.

I'm an athiest, but the immature flailings my fellow athiests direct at Christianity shame me and humiliate me by association.

If you athiests are so much more "mature" and "intellectual" than Christians, start acting like it.

It's true but many atheists are former christians and the christianity ruined their lives hence they lash out. I know I had my "lash out" period.

Also don't forget christians are no better in many regards, they use cult brainwashing tactics and peer pressure to shame about things that are totally natural (i.e. masturbation, sex, etc). Also despite my own inner aspie aggreement with you statement, being mocked and ridiculed in combination with 100% incontravertable evidence can cause people to feel bad about themselves enough to send them on the journey of self-discovery to deprogram themselves.

But as my aspie friend would say (paraphrasing):

Believing in the christian god is like believing in superman dude, what would you think of someone who told you they believed in superman?

I too went through a phase where I lashed out at religion in general. I came down too hard I guess, and I apologize.

Still, though, the point stands. The reason we athiests are frustrated with Christians, is because of the general disrespect we get from them as well as for the badgering. So it's hypocritical and just plain wrong to go around preaching how stupid religion is.

If someone starts trying to witness for me, the gloves are off and I will go in swinging, but I don't talk trash about religion unless provoked. Most Christians, believe it or not, are generally very nice people. It's the obnoxious ones that are also the loudmouths and thus the ones that get noticed.

No, Christianity does not ruin anybody's life unless the power to make important, irrevocable decisions is taken away from them. I realise this happens, but very rarely. This is why I never went for exit-counselling when I left Jehovah's Witnesses, simply because I worked out for myself that I was 100% responsible for how strictly I followed the teachings of the religion, at all times. Yes there was pressure, yes there were consequences for getting out but in end there was no way to avoid them. I did it, took the flak and got on with life.

In contrast, most so-called "de-programming" groups are nothing short of maniacally obsessed zealots who target religions like JW's out of their own personal agenda, driven by their refusal to accept that same responsibility. A number of these lunatics contacted, and tried to "counsel" me before I had even considered leaving, and ending up writing hateful letters to elders crediting themselves with turning me away from the religion - in spite of the fact that I stayed probably more than a year longer BECAUSE of them. This would have to be the first and foremost reason that, although I'm now an atheist, I refuse to believe that an atheist is generally a more rational and logical person
than a Christian.

Yep. Happen to me but that not God doing it to me. Nobody perfect. I'm sorry if you have to throw it away.

Again this is total BS. Religion is a form of propaganda, and if you don't believe it's harmful I only feel sorry that you've yet to understand that other people besides you are very easily taken advantage of by their parents. Most people come to their religion through their parents and there is definitely an emotional and evolutionary bias in terms of acceptance. Many children's minds besides your own are not mature enough to make good decisions for themselves yet.



Well then you haven't thought about it very thoroughly. An atheist isn't necessarily more rational or logical in all domains of his life, but when it comes to abrahamic religions, yes the atheist IS demonstrably more rational then the christian. Matt 8:30-34, go read it, then come back who is more rational, the christian who believes a god inspired such crap, or an atheist that knows its a bunch of hogwash.

The bible is inconsistent mishmash of myth and scrappings of history combined into one book. The fact is if you take the bible at face value, very few people are truly christian, since the bible defines what is and what isn't christian since that is the source of christianity. Most christians are christian in name only, since they have never studied the book they claim to believe in thoroughly.