No friends at all

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What should i do to aquire them? If people could help me by making a list of steps that i could come back to that would be great! My normal daily routine is to read blogs or wikipedia articles for 12 hours, so i may forget to do them othewise. Also my current sleep schedule is that of an Owl.


I have serious problems in my life which drive me towards suicidal ideation.

I need detailed and continuous help.

hi jamieboy! i'm nico!

i'm very sociable that most of what i do and did for a living all my life is about it. and i have tons of friends that my parents deport me to other places when its very necessary for me to not be distracted but i just end making more friends.. hehe.. i have many different kind of personalities for friends, from young to old, rich to poor, a priest to a drug dealer.. hehe.. there are concepts that applies to all so that's what im gonna list down for you. do only what and when you feel like, don't force yourself.

well first, you need to change your schedule and make it a point to remind yourself of your goal to make friends..
now on making friends:

spend time with people, hang around with them whatever it is they're doing that you think you could hang around for. you dont have to do much or grand efforts to spend the time just give them a sense you are there with them. there are no trophies at the end of this but you are investing in them friendship.

listen, NT's always talk a lot and have many concerns that may not concern or interest you but it doesn't mean it doesnt affect the other person, sometimes people just need somebody to listen or be there for them when they want to share what they have in their thoughts that affects them in whatever way. and if you could say something nice, say it.

do other people favors, do only what you can. if in some way you think you could help someone; help them. if you think its a nice gesture and intention that you have for someone, do it. give or do things that you know that another person will appreciate, it also doesnt have to be a grand gesture, little things put together is big..

share yourself. open up.. share a certain honesty or amount honesty about yourself to someone that you could allow. when you do this, its like welcoming another person's existence to your existence.. it's like showing them you trust them.

there's many more, i could get back at you about them when i recall.. now, on finding people.

hang out with a relative, they have friends, so they more likely would have automatic respect for you being a relative of their friend.

go out, hang out in a bar or coffee shop, diner or park whatever, and mingle in steps that you could and in the long run you'll realize you already made a friend..

join a group of similar activities and interest. sharing interest too is a way of connecting and sharing.

follow up on people you already know and try to build friendship from existing acquaintances..

don't be too picky. making friends could be direct but could also be indirect, friends could be made anywhere anyhow. just generally be nice to anyone and thats a start.

don't be too hard on yourself if it doesn't work exactly as you might hope. the world is full of people, i'm sure your approach will work on at least 10 in 100.

do not reject yourself for other people, there might be rejections, or failure, not exactly rejections but don't do that to yourself; thinking that you can't or they won't.

and there'll be those that wouldn't approve of you very much, let them go, you dont need them. you need a friend continue making them.

say hi to people, introduce yourself, remember and greet them on their birthdays, congratulate them, thank them, compliment them.

focus on doing nice things for other people that you can, and don't bother if other's not as nice, if you dont like them you could stay away, whats important is you're the one doing the nice things. and importantly;

SMILE!
also only if you can &/or comfortable.

and I could be your friend..
and so far these are what i have in mind at the moment.. so good luck and be well.. lemme know if there's anything else..

_________________
"If being in a wrong planet; I think I like your's."
NT, knighted Honorary Aspie for my love for an aspie..

First, I will need to know some more things in order to better help.

1. Are you in school?
2. Do you work? If not, do you have an income?

If you are not in school, I recommend on using meetup.com to find groups with similar interests to you. They have groups for board games, anime, heck probably even comic books and movies. So, find these groups if possible. If not, start one yourself.

Also, read books on understanding people better. Or, go to a community college and take a course in Interpersonal Communication, and if you desire Psychology as well.

Try looking up the word "friend" on wikipedia? since your there anyways it might give you hints on sucessful friendships

http://www.meetup.com/cities/gb/ln6_8ha/

Looks like meetup.com's gonna be a non starter.

a degree would put me in severe financial debt. I'd also have problems getting on the course having left school at 13

I don't either, it's easy having no friends in some ways but many people, such as family, are concerned about it because they think I will need friendship to develop social skills for work, dealing with things etc.

Where in England are you?

I find it harder to KEEP friends than make them. Aspies have trouble priortizing socializing vs. hanging out alone in their bedrooms

I'd say make going out and chatting with folks like a job you have to do. Set aside time to do it every week. If you are reasonably friendly and funny you ought to be able to make some connections. Then the trick is to keep in touch with those people through text or email or whatever and plan to meet up again.

I don't have any friends myself however i would like a few friends atleast though.