Northern Ontario mom of a brilliant Aspie boy

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gabbernaught
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24 Feb 2011, 4:32 pm

Hi!

I'm new (clearly) and figured I would throw out an introduction, as I can tell I'm probably going to spend a significant amount of time on here. :)

My *almost* 8 year old son was recently diagnosed with Aspergers. I've had my suspicions since he was about 4 but I was finally able to push to get an official diagnosis which confirms what I've thought since he started school. Northern Ontario has a real lack of doctors and waiting lists are a part of mainstream life up here.

Anyways, once he was diagnosed, my first emotion was relief: "someone finally agrees with me!! !", and then the fear and depression set in. I was afraid for him, for his future, for how it would change us as a family and confused about what being an Aspie really meant. I've always said I wish I could get inside his head and know what he's thinking, but his diagnosis came as a kick to the teeth to let me know that I'll never really know how his mind works.

After an initial depression, I became obsessed. I couldn't even do my job, or socialize, my only thought was Aspergers. I suppose it's still a bit of an obsession and my search for information has led me all over the web, and that's how I found WP.

I'm currently phasing him onto a gluten-free diet and awaiting many books with activities and strategies. (We don't really have a great supply of books on the subject, up here. Actually, I couldn't find any.)

I'm artistic and handy in the kitchen, so I began to treat this as an opportunity to make more things: activities, crafts, GF cooking, etc.

I'm a young mom, so for the longest time, teacher's treated me like crap and others looked down on me for his behaviour, even though I've been told that I'm a good mom by those closest to me. In a way the diagnosis boosted my confidence as a mom too, because now I know it wasn't my doing that cause his behaviour and "obstacles".

Well, that's me and my little man in a nutshell.

I'm open to PMs. :)



draelynn
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24 Feb 2011, 6:20 pm

Welcome!

My story is somewhat like yours too. My 8YO daughter was just recently diagnosised as an Aspie but with ADD and a learning disability tossed into the mix. I also knew since she was probably 2 1/2 something was 'different' and faced alot of ridicule and outright anger from my family for suggesting something was 'wrong' with her. She's been getting services since she was 3 1/2 for an unspecified developmental delay and was only diagnosised officially last month.

That said - never fear! You have a wonderfully unique little man. You and he will need to work on 'speaking the same language' but you'll get there. Aspies just have a different perspective on things. Try not to think of it as a disability. He's just different. I think there is nothing more valuable than just sitting back and watching... if he does things you don't understand take a step back and watch. Try to riddle out where he's coming from. He has an active, engaged mom ready to fight for him - he's already got so much more than so many kids just like him!

Amazon is a great place to find books - relatively cheap if you don't mind the used section. There are lots of recs and links to informative sites here on the boards. And whatever your boy is going through I can almost guarantee that there is an Aspie here who has been there-done that and can explain it from their perspective which you might find extremely helpful.

I strongly suspect that I'm an Aspie too - as a kid I was all about art! I was so happy to hear that you're ready to dive into projects and such with him. Try to stay flexible though. It's very tough for an Aspie to stay with something that is not one of their interests. Try tailoring things around whatever it is he is actively interested in.

Sounds like you are off to a running start mom!



ryan93
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24 Feb 2011, 8:24 pm

Welcome :)

Quote:
I've always said I wish I could get inside his head and know what he's thinking, but his diagnosis came as a kick to the teeth to let me know that I'll never really know how his mind works.


You might never understand him, but aspies don't understand the other 6 billion minds on the planet :lol:

The only advice I have is don't worry; Aspergers isn't really a big deal to many people who "have" it. Many people would hands down refuse a "cure", because it forms such an integral part of who we are. So relax :)


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JetLag
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24 Feb 2011, 10:19 pm

Hello and welcome aboard the WP, gabbernaught.


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25 Feb 2011, 11:47 am

Welcome!


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richie
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25 Feb 2011, 1:01 pm

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To WrongPlanet!! !Image


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CockneyRebel
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25 Feb 2011, 11:20 pm

Welkome to WrongPlanet. :)

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16 Apr 2011, 8:55 am

Hi there, just want to let you know I'm in Timmins with a just turned 8 year old boy that more than likely has aspergers. Looks like we are in a similar boat and maybe we can help each other.