Hello to all - new member

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Hi All,

My son is 13 and has been tentatively diagnosed with aspergers. Upon talking to the psychologist in depth and doing a bit of research online myself, I now find that I am highly likely to be a high functioning autistic myself (a relief to finally understand why I am so different after being on this strange world for 40 years!! !)
There are also quite a few 'eccentric' members of the family tree that appear to have followed suit.

I am a bit nervous but very hopeful about what this means for me and my family (my hubby and 14yo daughter seem to be 'flowing with the mainstream' of society)

can anyone help me with tips on how I can explain this to my husband and daughter in a way that doesnt alienate them or make them feel left out.
Also what do I say to my son who has aspies? How do I articulate the condition to him in a way he will absorb the info in a positive manner?

Thanks Jen

Welcome Jen, Not sure what you can tell your son. 13 was a critical time for me I
became depressed and in trouble with school. But that was 23 years ago and I never
heard of asperger till a few months ago. I'm sure your son knows he is "different". I
would just tell him what you know.

thanks for the welcome and support.

Welcome

I just have one question. Haven't your husband and daughter noticed something strange about you and your son by now. When my parents and I found out about my condition, it did not divide the family. My parents just slapped their foreheads, said, "So that's what it was," and we have had a better relationship since.

my hubby has a mother with bipolar disorder, so funnily enough i seemed more 'normal' to him in comparison! (his basis for judgement was a bit off)his mother is so emotionally needy and demonstrative that he actually loved the fact that I appeared so emotionally secure and a bit aloof and i didn't place excess demands on him.

we have a very close relationship on an intellectual level and our life has been based on' best mates' and mutual respect basis. I am so lucky. He loves the fact that I am very clever!! ! not threatened at all.
if challenged to work something out that I am a 'dog with a bone'.

Don't get me wrong, there are some levels where we just don't understand one another but we previously put this down to personality quirks. his reaction has been "Ahhhh that explains a lot!"
" always knew you were an einstein waiting to emerge"

Jen

my daughter, has withdrawn as if it is another excuse for my son's attention seeking behavior as she views it.

she is retreating to her room.
my son is upset that he has a 'syndrome' most people focus on train timetables etc as their obsession. he decided that being the most popular/tough kid in school would be his goal . heaven help us. this goal is soooo unattainable with our condition - he is going to fall in a heap in a scary way.

very worried.

jen

You're right. That is not the best goal. I wish I had some better advice for you.