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TigerFire
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22 Jul 2006, 12:58 pm

What life would be like if your failed attemps in getting a girl/boy friend would work great. If you got that girl or boy that you dreamed of. I wonder that too. How my life would be differnet if my ex fiance would have loved me and not let me go alone.


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Emettman
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22 Jul 2006, 2:53 pm

It's been so long... I'm really not sure what I'd do with one if I got one.


Groucho Marx's problem: any woman who wanted to marry me would have to be mad, and why should I marrry a lunatic?


OK, finding a soul-mate is still an occasional fantasy. But it's on a par with winning the lottery.



Veresae
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22 Jul 2006, 3:20 pm

We'd have pretty severe relationship problems, arguements, and then have to abruptly cut it off in a month.

Yeah, see, this was why I always focused more on getting over the person--because while she's much closer to what I'd need in a relationship than most people, I'd still probably have problems with her. This is the case with practically everyone--the problem is me more than anything.



hale_bopp
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22 Jul 2006, 8:09 pm

Sometimes.

But then I realised i'm better off without them. The people I used to like I wouldn't date for money nowdays.



whiteskunk
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22 Jul 2006, 8:12 pm

That would be my greatest fear, really my only fear coming to pass. Not finding someone and dying alone.


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Fiz
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23 Jul 2006, 10:12 am

I don't fear dying alone, I fear being with someone who is likely to hold me back in life more.

People are very quick to give up on love these days and the real meaning seems to have largely been lost by the vast majority. I have actually reconciled myself to the fact that maybe nobody will ever love me as, so far, the people I have fallen for have only wanted me for one thing. Nothing else.

All I look for in a person is that they just let me be who I am and not try to mither me or hold me back in life. I don't like being told what to do at all. But this is what most people do, only to find that they don't really love you anyway. If they did they wouldn't try to change you or hold you back from whatever it is you want to achieve. I would much rather be alone than date someone like this.


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gsilver
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23 Jul 2006, 11:28 pm

All the failed "almost relationships" I have had (I've never really had anything progress to the "relationship" status), it was probably a good thing that they ended.

What I do wish is that the fallout could have occured differently. In one case, the fallout was absolutely devastating, due to a reaction so long term and so negative that I gave up on everything... the only reason why I have a college degree (and am in grad school now) is because of not wanting my parents to know about it with all that they were already going through. To do this, I wanted to maintan an illusion of normalcy, and that was done by attending college.


Now I'm half way through a Master's program just figuring those things out (this particular revelation occured shortly after joining WP)


Of course, if I knew anything at all about Aspergers at the time (I was diagnosed, but my ****ing parents told me nothing... to them, all the diagnosis was was a bargaining chip for SSI... ****ing bastards!) I would have had a much greater understanding of what was going on, so the fallout wouldn't have been nearly as difficult.



KC
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28 Jul 2006, 8:23 pm

Ok, question for you.



Last edited by KC on 29 Jul 2006, 5:24 am, edited 2 times in total.

bettertohaveloved
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28 Jul 2006, 8:34 pm

I find that relationships are so much hard work. I mean it is so cool i have experienced it but I also feel the more relationships i get in and out of the more hurt i get and then the more i get hard hearted and fightend of getting hurt again or hurting others. I find that i go out with extrems when i go out with poeple and that isnt' healthy. The boys i been out with havn't been compatible and how do you know when you are compatable?



KC
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28 Jul 2006, 8:50 pm

Ok, compatibility.



Last edited by KC on 29 Jul 2006, 5:22 am, edited 1 time in total.

bettertohaveloved
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28 Jul 2006, 9:25 pm

Dunno differnt people are different and it depends on where he has been hurt. I would show him that you care and love him but communicate that in a way that you know he understands.(that might not be in a physical sense) If you know the person so well then you should know how to talk to him. Also people with ASD need to learn that they deserved to be loved. what a privalige it is to teach someone like that! it can be difficult with asd as it not that we can't communicat nessasarly but just have different ways don't freak him out but also he need to know how you feel about him in a way. i hate it when people hide there feelings with me as i find it hard enough how to read people with out people going out there way to hind things from me lol i dunno if that helps