Why do people bully?

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I have been bullied in the past at school but recently I have been left alone and borken up for the summer. But there is one thing: just why do they do it?

I have never really been physically or sexually bullied but mainly verbally.

Examples of past bullying events:

People spreading rumours behind my back.
Someone trying to make me look guilty for something I didn't even do, and then the whole class is against me, even if that was something so trivial, eg. saying a girl in my class tried to be the class clown. (See my older topic "B1TCH!! !" for more information)
People chanting my name, knowing that I am sensitive to it.
Things thrown at me.
People constantly having a go at me until they get a reaction out of me. (Like when in year 8, I was in a French class and people were groaning at me when I got in a slight argument when I tried to tell the teacher that people were quietly teasing me, and eventually everybody got involved and I shouted "SHUT UP!! !") That's just like bear baiting - driven mad like me, and its 'dance' being my reaction. (metaphorically)
Someone discreetly telling people to make fun of me and I think that they mentioned Aspergers Syndromes as negative.
Being excluded from activities.
People touching me and putting middle fingers up at me (out of my glasses lens where I can't properly see it), trying not to reveal that it was them.
People telling me to shut up, and I don't like being told to shut up.
Remember a programme called Hardspell on BBC? I was on it, and it got to people that I was bragging, even though I never meant to. Also, since I was upset about me not qualifying to the next round, people made fun of me and never gave me any support.
People whispering my name and immediately turning around on contact with me.
People intentionally doing acts or saying things which relate to some of my problems.

The list can go on...

I don't know exactly why people have been doing this, as I am not physically weird. They all know I had AS, so I don't know why they have.

Maybe some of you could help me realise why this has been happening and why some saddoes did that, and better yet, you could bash them as well.

They're overcompensating for their tiny, tiny penises.

...and their even tinier, little brains!

Their just low people in general, wish some people could just understand and accept that we are different these days. Happened to me a few times when i went to school. They probabley do it because were the odd one out to as*holes like them.

we are aspies we all get bullied it is part of our lives.....i gopt bullied at school and i ignored it all and worked hard...nowi take great satisfaction that the people that bullied me at school are the types of people who now clean my appartment and ask me what wine i would liek with my dinner ....im not being elitist here, i am sating aspieness invites bullying but also gives us gifts, it allowed me to ignore the bullies AND focus on my work and do well at school and life compared to most nt people.

I know what you mean, just proves their the worser people in the end

Because they have something wrong in their sad,pathetic lives and you were there.

they pick you because they get such a good reaction.

If you just say that's a cruel and heartless thing to do, and it's not funny and walk off without chucking a temper tantrum or demanding justice, or you just plain ignore it (not always easy I know). Pretending to be deaf could be interesting. The bullies get bored after a while. They will look for someone else who gives them a better reaction.

Humiliating them also works. If you have some snappy comeback line that makes them look like the evolutionary rejects they are in front of lots of people, that can help. I think that's why I got left alone pretty much at school. A combination of not reacting at all as expected, and humiliating anyone I was sure was a problem. Haven't you got anything better to do? Is your brain too tiny to come up with something? Do you need some help with your homework? And the absolute killer - from a girl to a guy "you're only doing that because you have a secret crush on me".

It's part of establishing a "pecking order". They peck you so you will move to the bottom of the pecking order and they move up.

Which makes them no better than hens really.

This article explains it quite well
http://www.paulgraham.com/nerds.html

interesting thought, i think that all nt communication which aspies cant stand is peckign order resonance.
they will send out little feelers of nt chit chat to establish pecking order and aspies who dont respond get bullied.
i been bullied and i have responded in various ways, but all in all i responded by working harder and just being better than them, not trying to be snobby or show them i am better but by just being "better" and getting on in life, yeah i got in some fights, i smashed soem kids and times they smashed me, but nt's get that too, its life and it s tough but dont ever complain. just move on like a good aspie.

I was bullied in high school. It wasn't as bad in math, since I tested high and was in a college prep level class with others of similar intellect, but gym, history, etc were horrible. I was small, underweight and a high school runt. And a nerd.

Boys and girls have different pecking orders, and pecking rules as well. The jock/cheerleader is still on top, uglies on the bottom, but girl jocks are not as popular as cheerleaders. BTW, I was one rung above the bottom because I could speak in complete sentences.

I compensated by doing two things. First, I never let them see me hurt. I pulled back all emotion. Second, I found a gimmick that set them back. Torture. No, I didn't do it. I just talked about it. I read about it. And people began to look at this weird little kid that didn't react to pain and talked about what horrible things people DID do to each other, and they began to give me a little space. Not much, but enough that my day to day life was not as miserable as it was before. I reacted to exclusion by creating exclusion.

I am not saying that my way was the best way, and definitely is not the only way. But you need to find their weakness, and capitalize on it. Make it your strength, and stay in your position of strength.

FWIW, I did not see this in college. There was still the in group and the out group, but the out group was left alone being the out group, not abused for being the out group.

I'd agree with that, nobody tried to bully me after I finished school and started Uni.

It might have been different if I'd started a trade like plumbing. But at Uni, your brains are your most valuable asset. Non conformity or originality is sought after, so people don't pick on you for these things.

Nobody was using my back to climb up some imaginary ladder, and nobody was trying to make me fit in. There were so many people there, all with the same goal of "higher" learning, that you could always find some like minded people to hang out with if you wanted and if you didn't, the library was huge and you could tell people you were studying and didn't feel like chatting.

I'm glad for that. There won't be second-rated idiots who tease or muck about at university, or maybe even 6th Form.

If somebody asks me a question such as "Do you fancy (NAME)?" I could say "If you ever become more mature, then I will answer your question"

Unfortunately my comebacks have resulted in ridicule towards me. Since at the time about 96% of the class were biased against me, so they would try to tick me off.

Lucky for me idiots like that will no longer be a part of my life, and to me they will always be a "short lived bacterium".

Whenever someone has bullied me, I report it to my learning support teacher (I'm fine in class but I have social skills lessons) who knows a lot about Aspergers, and she can help me figure out why people mare doing it and how to respond.

OR, if it's a boy to a boy, you could say "You're only doing that because you think I'm sexy" (Something like that makes them look gay)

deep-techno

There will still be some idiots at uni but most of them won't make it past the first year of study. There will be a few pranksters right the way through. But mostly they will be "intelligent" pranks. These people are much easier to avoid at Uni than at school.

This may backfire and make you look gay. And I guess gay people are still being persecuted at high school? Not good. If you are gay it would be appropriate. Something more PC might be better "... you're jealous of my brains". Ie choose some feature about you that they already pick on you for, and suggest the bully secretly wants to be like that too.

i know how you feel. i was bullied from the 4th grade untill the 10th grade, with grades 7&8 being the worst. i got into a total of 8 fights in my school career and lost 7 of them. i never wanted to tell a teacher or an adult or anything because that would have made me a bigger target for the bullies. it was terrible. just look forward to knowing one day you'll be getting out of school and more than likely wont be bullied again.

unless you get into a crappy job like i did 4 years ago as a overnight stocker. everyone called me waldo that worked with me, uhh yeah. "where's waldo" get it. im happy i got laid off from that job, it was hard enough working let alone being called names while i worked.

I am looking forward to Year 10 (9th Grade) as people will be doing their GCSEs, concentrating on study and will focus on their work. Then there will be no space for bullies.

I am quite good at ignoring people. I often pretend that they are not there, and if someone calls my name to ask an inappropriate question I will get down and closely look at my work. That works well.

Walking away is not always very helpful as it is inevitable in classrooms. But just glancing at them and then looking away is how I would handle it.

If only that were true. The idiots who bully don't want to be there, don't care about passing their GCSEs and therefore try to pick on people who do. It's when you get to Sixth Form that it's alright. I'll say I've been very fortunate in my school life, I was quiet enough to generally go pretty much unnoticed - of course people knew I was clever (without meaning to sound big-headed, I'm just saying) but I kept myself in the library a lot of the time, and since Upper School I've practically lived in the music department. I now have friends thanks to music, so we go there and when there were idiots in our year (ie from yrs 9-11) the nasties wouldn't be seen dead down there