More 'Freedom' in my mid-twenties. Is this common?

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Heresdan
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18 Apr 2011, 1:50 pm

I received a late diagnosis of high-functioning autism at 20. My teenage years were a train wreck... I had some other stuff going on, but living with undiagnosed autism was hell. Now that I am in my mid-twenties, for the first time since childhood, my life is actually enjoyable! I have seen a sort of "normalization" of many of my autistic quarks & a "loosening" of my rigid ways lately. I am sure that some of this is due to pharmacological treatment [for depression, OCD, & ADD]; however, I am not entirely convinced that this explains all of the changes that I have seen [though I will concede that having the tools to compensate for certain things has helped enormously]. Is it a common occurance for individuals with autism to sort of mellow out & "normalize" as they age? Any insights/experiences from older autistics out there?



Peeled_Lemon
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19 Apr 2011, 1:43 pm

From my own experience I think it certainly is normal, autism or not. I only recently thought I might be an aspie but I can't make up my mind; all the social problems certainly resonate with me, there are other things that don't however. It doesn't help that it's harder to find information that's only about women.

To get back to your question, it's common for people to tell children that they're living through the best years of their lives but that's simply not true. Children's lives are based around the whims of other people. Such whims are often arbitrary and can be based on negative emotions. Imagine a dwarf wearing a cowboy hat dropping from your ceiling at this moment, producing a banana that he thrusts at you in a menacing way, and ordering you to clean your ears NOW. RIGHT NOW. NO, DON'T BLINK. CLEAN YOUR EARS.

That's what it's like to be a child. At least, that's what I remember of childhood. Not literally, of course.

I think it's natural to enjoy the freedoms that being an adult bring. The responsibilities can certainly be heavy, but I think the little things like being able to choose what to eat or when to sleep can make up for them to some extent. Control over the little things makes us feel more secure when we face up to the bigger ones.

I'm glad you're feeling happier these days.



blauSamstag
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19 Apr 2011, 4:08 pm

that's your prefrontal cortex kicking in.



Moopants
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21 Apr 2011, 4:45 pm

Mine came in my early 30s but yes I believe it is common for everyone. When I was about to turn 30, my granny of all people said that you leave the worries of your youth behind and start to really enjoy life and she was so right. AS traits dont go away but the worrying does.



Moog
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21 Apr 2011, 4:54 pm

I felt things improved a lot for me over my late twenties.


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MissConstrue
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21 Apr 2011, 7:24 pm

I know mental stability has much improved over the years. I can't say I'm content or feel any more free. Then again I have a depressive disorder so it's hard to say. I know in my teens and early twenties I felt death was much better than life. I was in one hospital after another and my mental state was not good. I wasn't diagnosed until I was around 20. It took a long time to accept my diagnosis and as much as it was hard for me to accept this slight malfunction, it did open a lot of doors for me. I'm not as at war with myself as I use to be nor as socially conscious. I was looking at some T-shirts and I noticed one that said "I have Aspergers, What's Your Excuse". The shirt really describes my attitude these days. Whether aspergers or not, I don't feel this need to "fit in" as i use to. Criticism and ridicule don't get to me as bad as it use to.


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blauSamstag
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21 Apr 2011, 10:13 pm

I'm serious. Aside from the hormones, teenagers don't have fully formed brains.



Amajanshi
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13 May 2011, 9:44 pm

Things that used to make me very upset or very angry (prior to age 21) only make me slightly upset or pissed off now.

I think being diagnosed in my early 20's (age 21) was beneficial, as having an official AS diagnosis gave me a framework as to seeing what issues commonly affect us.

I know I have mild executive dysfunction, and I can get burnt out easily, so I had to mentally prioritize certain social situations, so it won't drag me down significantly if the conversation goes bad. I'm feeling happier in knowing that not everything is my fault, and many times it is due to THEIR inflexibility and intolerance of those with non-harmful differences.

My hyperfocus ability towards my special interests has decreased as I'm very busy with Uni, and I'm placing more focus on dealing with specific issues from AS so hopefully in the longer term, I'll be better adjusted. I take this as a price to pay for my sanity later on...