Lackluster libido

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I have a guy pal (aspie - he's JUST a friend ) and he's told me that he's concerned about his lack of a sex drive. I was hoping to help him by doing some research. I've read some blogs etc. and apparently this is a bit more common for people with Asperger's than NTs. Is this true?

I guess my question goes out to the guys: how common is this and is there anything that you know of to help ramp up your libido?

My first thought is Asexuality:
http://www.asexuality.org/home/
there's been very little research done on asexuality, let alone asexuality as correlated with other statistical anomalies,
but I and many many people both here and over at AVEN agree that there seems to be an anecdotal link.

But first-
does your friend lack sexual ATTRACTION (not romantic attraction, which asexuals often have)
or does he actually lack a sex DRIVE or LIBIDO (those are the two you mentioned, I just want to make sure drive is really the issue)?

Of course, there are people who lack both as well.

Last edited by Bethie on 05 May 2011, 11:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Just more anecdotal stuff: it seems to me that people with AS tend to gravitate to one end of the sexual continuum or the other. Bluntly, they want it all the time or not much/never at all.

or both, at different times...

This. I often bounce back and forth between the two extremes and have trouble keeping a balance. Then again, I'm also bipolar, and that issue is common with people with that disorder.

This has to do with challenge and complexity. I want things precisely challenging and complex enough. Slightly too easy and it's not interesting. Slightly too difficult and I get frustrated and overwhelmed. I think a lot of autistics have this same issue.

I had next to no libido for many years. Then, for no reason, it came back. It hasn't left since, (unless I count the few odd days here and there.) Actually there might have been several reasons that it returned. I changed my diet and started taking herbs to build my energy. I also started taking a quality multivitamin. But I don't know if that is what caused my libido to return.

Is he on medication? Lack of sex drive can be side-effects from meds but it may be related to being an Aspie or just the way he is

Bethie -- thanks so much for the link. I'll check that out.

According to my pal, he says it's his libido but you do indeed make a good point here. He told me that it he isn't often attracted to people too, so perhaps you are more on target and he's just guessing his libido is down, when maybe it is the sexual attraction piece of the puzzle. He did tell me that when he was in college (many years ago) he had a healthy sex drive. Apparently, now he only feels the urge a few times each year. I know this is somewhat alarming to him, so I appreciate your insights.

Thank you!

Good point, Xeno. He had mentioned that depression runs in his family, so I actually suspect that has been playing a role in his conundrum. I'll have to check into those mitigating factors a bit further.

Many thanks for your insight

You know when I asked him what typically helped, he'd mentioned that exercise and eating better worked a bit. Because I suspect some depression playing a role, it could be that exercise/eating right helps the depression, which in turn helps the libido. Who knows? What types of herbs have you found effective to boost your energy?

thanks much

Nope -- he's not taking anything. Could just be the way he is, or the co-morbid factor of depression. Not sure, but you make an excellent point. Thanks for your comments.

It could be related to depression or maybe he became disinterested due to growing up or something. I obsessively thought about sex when I was a teen but I quit desiring it after I got in a long-distance internet relationship because I learned there was better things to care about. I got depressed when it ended & I lost my drive for a while but I've been off meds for a few years & feeling good lately & have my drive but I don't desire sex

Most of the herbs I experimented with, I read about in this book:
http://tinyurl.com/3tzpacp

Then I started going to an acupuncturist, who was able to better taylor the herbs to my particular issues. But for starters, Ginseng is a good one for energy issues.

Thanks, Hartzofspace! I'll check it out.

You're welcome!