The concept of "hanging out"

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So I was talking with two girls. I'll make their aliases Smu and Rmo. We were talking about people in our class and I asked Smu, "Do you like half the kids you hang out with?" She said no, she mainly liked Rmo and I, plus a few other kids. I asked her why she hung out with kids she didn't really like. She said she didn't know, she just tolerated them. We then talked about a girl in my class, her alias is Wem. (Sorry for the weird aliases - not!) Smu said that her friends (plus everyone in the grade) hate her and I questioned why they hang out with her then and why she thinks they like her. My question wasn't answered. Rmo said that I only hang with kids I like, which is why I hang with so few.

Why do people hang out with people they don't like? I don't understand this social thing.

I suppose it comes down to the fact that they look at the people that shun others off, and go that they will not be like them, Therefore tolerating the individuals. If more people were like that, We would be in a better world.

The in crowd system, as i guess you would call it, seems to be a very complicated thing. It seems to me with girls in particuliar that they will run around and "pretend to be everyones friend". What i mean by this is that A girl may go up to another girl while in class and she will pretend that this other girl and her are bfs. but as soon as the other girl leaves she will say nasty things about the other girl. i see it happen all the time. Boys arent quite as bad about it and if they have a problem with you they will bluntly say it to your face, But boys do play the shunning game more since we dont pretend to like people we dont. I dont know why Nts feel the need to judge people so much and play games, i think its because they have never felt the pain of judgement or have gone through the hardship of being a young child that feels like they can never belong like aspies have.

I don't really shun others as I do separate myself from them.

i just dont understand "hanging out" in general. even if it is with a person or people i like. i would much rather choose an activity through mutual agreement, do it, finish it, and agree to do something else or go home. i have tried to hang out down town with other people but i feel like im tagging along not particularly having any impact on the dynamic of the group and thus wasting my time.

Now due to this, I will wonder who my real friends are in High School.

Well, in high school, it could be because the people they hang out with are popular and they want to be popular. Or maybe their parents are friends with each other so want the kids to be friends too.

I don't hang out with people I don't, unless I'm forced to.

It's because people usually hang out in larger groups, so you can't really hang out with one but not with another person. They just hang out in groups despite the fact that some people like each other and some do not.

The girl part I notice very much. They will talk say they do not like someone and I think but you seem so friendly. I do not comment as they only say i do not like and do not proceed to gossip. they are often kind to my face but they do gossip about me so I do not trust. I do not know if the disliked girls know they are disliked by a "friend" If it is a game what would the appeal of lies? Are people bored by telling truth and like to get away with something fake? I do not even think they realize how much they would be lying while playing this game.

I like most of the people I hang out with, for some reason or another. I don't really understand why I'd want to sit around talking with someone else.

Man, I've wonder the same thing myself. A friend of mine from one of my previous volunteer jobs was like this. She would hang out with a couple of kids from our job, but then talk about them behind their backs. My older brother and I once went with her and her boyfriend (who also used to work there) and they were talking about how much they hated the other kids. It made no sense to me and I wanted to punch in the face for being a total b*tch

Last edited by BlueElephantKing on 10 Dec 2012, 6:46 am, edited 1 time in total.

The social concept of "hanging out" is for friends to shoot the breeze and just screw around. There is no real purpose. It's to relax and enjoy yourself around others.

Best Regards,

Jake