Why is dating considerably easier after 40

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Why is dating considerably easier after 40. That is the question I my soon have to ask approaching 40. The truth is, it will have to be considerably easier, as I found it difficult in my younger years. I feel that finding live is like trying to start a career as premiership footballer at 40
, while many x champion foodballers are finding hard to get back into football.

Wow, I've found exactly the opposite, especially as a woman (something you don't have to contend with, obviously). The dating pool is very, very small for me, and the things I'm looking for are specific. My lifestyle doesn't bring me into contact with many age- and lifestyle-appropriate single men. It's really difficult!

I don't mean to discourage you. I have children, so that's another hurdle in terms of dating, for me. Your lifestyle is probably a lot more amenable to pursuit, which is great!

Where?!

I made need to emmigrate...

If you were maybe willing to go younger, you may find someone?

By ArtTv, on Flickr

I don't think there are many younger men willing to form a relationship with an older single mother. (I'm 43). Yes, they'd be happy to have sex with me (and really, who wouldn't? ), but that's not what I'm looking for. Plus, and I hate myself for saying this, I don't find many younger men to be ... respectworthy. They're almost "too young" to me, in attitudes and maturity, etc. And yet I can't bring myself to date older men, either. It's my own fault, really.

But that was a good suggestion, Tequila. Thanks.

Last edited by mv on 05 Aug 2011, 8:15 am, edited 1 time in total.

I might be interested in forming a relationship with an older woman - that part wouldn't bother me. The single mum part would though.

And yes I probably would be up for sexytimes.

I guess what you said is true. But hasn't it been true for the last 20 years.

Why? I'm just curious.

Aspie_Chav - it's tough for all of us Aspies. We live inside our heads. The men here tell stories of rejection, the women tell stories of rejection and horrible abuse.

But you know what? The beauty of 40+ is the self-knowledge and the freedom to let go of all the external s**t. That's where you'll find your comfort and your love.

It depends, but I don't like children in general. Never really have. And I would feel that I am second. Of course, it all depends on how old the kiddywink is.

It depends on the person.

No standard rule.

qft

I've already tried sex-based relationships and believe it or not, I prefer being single. I find them soul-destroying...

QFT

I don't know about it being any easier after 40. However, what you have learned in those years (about yourself, your strengths/weaknesses, what you want/don't want, and having a much firmer idea of what you won't settle for) can help when making choices about who what type of person you really want to spend time with. As for initiating contact and going out on dates, I can't say that being over 40 makes it any less awkward/difficult than it was before.

On the other hand, those of us that are forty and beyond begin to develop stress-free methods to minimize those awkward silences that go along with dating:

-changing our hearing aid batteries
-trying to remember to take our pills
-concentrating on not falling and breaking a hip
-forgetting you're on a date in the first place

Seriously, it is a good sign that you are looking forward to the next phase of your life. Good luck!