What I do and don't like in a guy - help looking for a guy

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Do you do 3d and/or 2d computer graphics and/or programming?
Yes, I do computer graphics. 19%  19%  [ 5 ]
Yes, I do programming. 11%  11%  [ 3 ]
I do both computer graphics and programming. 26%  26%  [ 7 ]
I do neither programming nor computer graphics. 44%  44%  [ 12 ]
Total votes : 27

BloomingArtist
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14 Sep 2011, 11:59 pm

Okay, this is my first time here, and my first post here. I know this list of mine is going to be very detailed and long, but it's just the kind of things I like and don't like, and those are things I would like in a guy, if I had a boyfriend or non-online date. I don't know where to look for guys like me. So here is my list of things I like and things I don't like, and I would love to see if anyone knows where I can find a match without going for online dating, to look for a guy:

Likes:
1. a non-smoker guy.

2. a guy who doesn't abuse drugs and/or alcohol.

3. a guy who can do computer
graphics (2d and/or 3d) and/or
game programming.

4. a guy who is nice, and clean
(both physically, and verbally).

5. A guy with any other hobbies like me,
including: growing a garden
(mostly tomatoes, basil, (my favorites!)), making
music on a computer using software to make it,
singing, drawing anime/manga and other types
of cartoons, baking (mostly desserts,
but meals are a plus!), 3d computer graphics,
2d computer graphics, working out to stay fit.

6. A strong, fit guy.

7. a guy who understands people with
disabilities, and issues.

8. a guy who doesn't mind being flirty, and kissing.

Dislikes:
1. a guy who has dogs. (I have cats and prefer them over messy dogs that you must walk with every day).

2. a mean guy (swearing badly, hurting others/me, abusing in any other ways, having more than one relationship at once).

Note - as you can see, my "Dislikes" list is shorter than the "Likes" list. I have a lot of interests, and I think that would open me up to more possible men, although, my main focus is computer graphics, both 2d and 3d.

Please, can someone offer suggestions to what kinds of places I could find a nice single guy, in a town-like area, not a big city.
I want a relationship that I can keep with a guy, and I would like to know ways to find a guy that can relate to me.

It would be amazing if I found a single guy who can fit into all the items on my likes and dislikes lists all at once. Yes, that would be the ultimate guy for me.

I don't only have a high-functioning Autisim spectrum disorder, I have severe anxiety and depression, and touretts syndrome.



Zinnel
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15 Sep 2011, 12:17 am

lol realy?

i mean everyone i know does computer and programming to some extent?

its one of the biggest degrees being chosen now, i would not be surprized if in 5 years all the computer/programming jobs are taken and millions of people will be unable to find work in those fields

and then it will be some other field that will be the next BIG thing, like alteritive energies or something

i suggest looking in computer stores, maybe comic book stores, library, maybe gaming tournaments, ur best bet is a computer and technology school/college i once met a women who was taking classes just so she could find a guy who had the same interests



Nadir
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15 Sep 2011, 1:05 am

After reading what you want, I think I am gonna go for a relationship with an NT. :duh:



Bloviater
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15 Sep 2011, 3:26 am

Good luck. Those are some steep standards you have.



CanadianRose
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15 Sep 2011, 4:01 am

First, welcome to WrongPlanet. Now onto your list:


BloomingArtist wrote:
Okay, this is my first time here, and my first post here. I know this list of mine is going to be very detailed and long, but it's just the kind of things I like and don't like, and those are things I would like in a guy, if I had a boyfriend or non-online date. I don't know where to look for guys like me. So here is my list of things I like and things I don't like, and I would love to see if anyone knows where I can find a match without going for online dating, to look for a guy:

Likes:
1. a non-smoker guy.

What if he smokes only once in a while, and is a respectful smoker (i.e. smokes outside, doesn't leave cigarette butts lying around, keeps his hair and clothes clean so he doens't smell of smoke, etc). Yes, they are rare, but they do exist.


2. a guy who doesn't abuse drugs and/or alcohol.

What about a social drinker? If he enjoys the odd beer or a glass of wine - is this okay. Also, some people enjoy a drink and a cigarette once in a while (say three times per month). Would this be okay?

3. a guy who can do computer
graphics (2d and/or 3d) and/or
game programming.

I am going to guess, but this is probably something that you spend a lot of time with and want someone to share this interest. Understandable.

4. a guy who is nice, and clean
(both physically, and verbally).

Hygiene is nice. I guess you mean that you don't want someone who swears a lot. Is the odd cuss word that might escape from his lips okay?

5. A guy with any other hobbies like me,
including: growing a garden
(mostly tomatoes, basil, (my favorites!)), making
music on a computer using software to make it,
singing, drawing anime/manga and other types
of cartoons, baking (mostly desserts,
but meals are a plus!), 3d computer graphics,
2d computer graphics, working out to stay fit.

You've already mentioned the computer graphics thing. Sometimes, it is nice for people to to complimentary interests. You might enjoy gardening, but he might enjoy painting. He could paint a picture of you tending your garden. You like baking - he might like cooking - then you could make a nice meal together. He might enjoy some other things - such as golf or bowling - and he could do these things by himself and then spend time with you doing shared interests (such as the computer stuff).

6. A strong, fit guy.

I am going to assume that you are a strong, fit, person yourself who likes to spend time at the gym or otherwise staying in shape. Maybe you can go to the gym together? If you are not a strong, fit person yourself, then you might want to loosen up on this standard.

7. a guy who understands people with
disabilities, and issues.

8. a guy who doesn't mind being flirty, and kissing.

Dislikes:
1. a guy who has dogs. (I have cats and prefer them over messy dogs that you must walk with every day).

2. a mean guy (swearing badly, hurting others/me, abusing in any other ways, having more than one relationship at once).

Remember - when you are casually dating - it is perfectly okay to see other people. Some people prefer to have a monogamous relationship once there relationship becomes more cemented. You might scare some guy off if you except exclusivity after one date. Don't get me wrong - maintain your standards - but take the time to get to know someone in a dating relationship (not necessarily having sex with him) and give both you and him room to see others as well. If you find yourselves wanting to be with eachother because you enjoy eachothers company - then start talking about exclusivity.

Note - as you can see, my "Dislikes" list is shorter than the "Likes" list. I have a lot of interests, and I think that would open me up to more possible men, although, my main focus is computer graphics, both 2d and 3d.

Please, can someone offer suggestions to what kinds of places I could find a nice single guy, in a town-like area, not a big city.
I want a relationship that I can keep with a guy, and I would like to know ways to find a guy that can relate to me.

It would be amazing if I found a single guy who can fit into all the items on my likes and dislikes lists all at once. Yes, that would be the ultimate guy for me.

I don't only have a high-functioning Autisim spectrum disorder, I have severe anxiety and depression, and touretts syndrome.


I agree with other people responding - go to computer stores, comic book shops, try specific Asperger dating sites (I think there is one attached to WrongPlanet), go to workshops, continuing education in areas that interest you. The nice thing about workshops, conventions and continuing education is that you will meet people (both male and female) who share interests and with whom you can develop friendships, networks, etc. But, even if you don't meet anyone "special" - you will still benefit from learning new things about subjects that interest you. This will help make you a more interesting person (ergo more "attractive" to your dream guy - wherever he may be). :)



AsteroidNap
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15 Sep 2011, 5:19 am

Bloviater wrote:
Good luck. Those are some steep standards you have.


wth? How are they steep standards? They seemed fairly reasonable to me, if specific.


Not sure how old you are, but definitely hang out at comic shops. Also, you might try hanging out at hobby stores where games like D&D or Magic are sold and played. Often times these fans are also fans of Manga/anime, and are typically rather intelligent.

Also, google manga/anime conventions for your area. This is a great place to meet people with that interest.



Sextaesada
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15 Sep 2011, 6:32 pm

Bloviater wrote:
Good luck. Those are some steep standards you have.
yeah hahaha, I will happy to just find someone I enjoy being around and someone that feels the same.



Joker
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16 Sep 2011, 12:09 am

As far as men go they can be dumb as a rock for all I care as long as they have a big tool and a nice body :wink:

When it comes to girls I like it when their sugar spice and everything nice :P



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16 Sep 2011, 12:18 am

Bloviater wrote:
Good luck. Those are some steep standards you have.


:lol:

I know, a case of unrealistic expectations.


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ToadOfSteel
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16 Sep 2011, 12:30 am

Damn, 7 for 8...

guess which one I don't make the cut on...



Joker
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16 Sep 2011, 12:36 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:
Damn, 7 for 8...

guess which one I don't make the cut on...


I am gonna take a shot in the dark here is it both 7 and 8?



nick007
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16 Sep 2011, 6:49 am

Joker wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
Damn, 7 for 8...

guess which one I don't make the cut on...


I am gonna take a shot in the dark here is it both 7 and 8?

I was going to post that if the OP didn't say non-online thing; she might be interested in you Toad. I think you understand people with disabilities & issues Toad or would if you had more experiences with people like that. As for #8; I think you might could get into it if you were together after a while & felt comfortable withe her


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Tequila
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16 Sep 2011, 7:39 am

Well, let's take a look:

BloomingArtist wrote:
1. a non-smoker guy.


Pass - non-smoker.

Quote:
2. a guy who doesn't abuse drugs and/or alcohol.


Fail - I like my ale, and occasionally a whisky.

Quote:
3. a guy who can do computer
graphics (2d and/or 3d) and/or
game programming.


Fail.

Quote:
4. a guy who is nice, and clean
(both physically, and verbally).


Mixture of pass and fail, depending on who you ask. I am definitely clean though. :)

Quote:
5. A guy with any other hobbies like me,
including: growing a garden
(mostly tomatoes, basil, (my favorites!)), making
music on a computer using software to make it,
singing, drawing anime/manga and other types
of cartoons, baking (mostly desserts,
but meals are a plus!), 3d computer graphics,
2d computer graphics, working out to stay fit.


Fail.

Quote:
6. A strong, fit guy.


Fail.

Quote:
7. a guy who understands people with
disabilities, and issues.


Depends. Probably a mixture of pass and fail.

Quote:
8. a guy who doesn't mind being flirty, and kissing.


Put neutral or pass for that one.

Quote:
Dislikes:
1. a guy who has dogs. (I have cats and prefer them over messy dogs that you must walk with every day).


Pass - fear/dislike dogs.

Quote:
2. a mean guy (swearing badly, hurting others/me, abusing in any other ways, having more than one relationship at once).


Pass.

[quote[I don't only have a high-functioning Autisim spectrum disorder, I have severe anxiety and depression, and touretts syndrome.[/quote]

I presume I failed, then? ;)



The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Sep 2011, 10:05 am

Only that? :-/



hale_bopp
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16 Sep 2011, 10:39 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Only that? :-/


You aren't getting my messages again. :wall:



The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Sep 2011, 10:54 am

hale_bopp wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Only that? :-/


You aren't getting my messages again. :wall:


I am just playing the "hard to get"

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