Working as an Aspie (Being too good can be bad)
Without getting to the long history of how this has played out many times before, here is the situation a few months back to current.
Job #1
This job started back in May. The problem with this job is the moralistic (honest and ethical) bit me was hard for me. Early on in the job is was very clear that from my co-workers to my supervisors following ethical (nicer than saying legal)rules was not cared for. If you could do the job unethically in four hours, instead of a whole day; you where a model employee. I needed the job so I just bit my lip, and decided they would have to fire me before became unethical. Within the first month I managed to get our two "best" (most unethical) workers fired for gross safety voilations, which are appearntly more important than legal requirements. The next month I contributed greatly to demotion of a middle-level worker(on track for supervising role) for gross ethical concerns. By this point everyone hated me, from co-workers to supervisors. My third and final month things were more or less simmering down until my two week notice. I blantly said the company had issues and if not corrected are going to become legal matters when the EPA comes to audit (They are audited every five years). My direct supervision played dumb and acted like they didn't know this was an issue (the biggest line of BS ever). Before I left though my supervision bosses organized an exit interview for me because they caught wind of what was in my two weeks notice. We had a come to Jesus meeting without any of my co-workers or supervisors, and you would have thought I was Jesus come back. I left with invations for lunch, recommendations, whatever I needed. Appearantly they have knew about the situation where I was, but have never had anyone come forward. So, at the end of the day everyone from my local worksite hated(and still hates) me, but everyone from corporate loves me.
Job #2
In this job I am constantly ahead of my cohorts. We are in a very self-driven training period. I help my cohorts with questions, give them answers, reference material, and anything else I can, but I am constantly ahead of them. I also scheadule I lot of our meetings and always the one who emails our questions and concerns to right people. Once again, one cohort (when I was not in the room) said, "this guy keeps this up and he's going to get me fired." While my supervisor is giving me praise and talking about plans on how to maximize my contributions. Then, just today, an another employee just finished his training and was given a comprehensive oral exam. He comes out shaking his head, saying he should have done better. People starting asking him about the questions he was asked and even they (multiple years experience) can't answer them. Try as I might I still was answering some of the questions they couldn't answer, I haven't even been on the job for a month yet.
It always seems to be this way. I really don't try to brown nose to leadership, but always seems like they love me (mainly because of those aspie quirks that make a great employee) and my co-workers hate me. One of my current cohorts has my back and tells anyone talking about me, "so what he is quiet and stand-offish, he has a hell of a work ethic and he still tries to help others." He is the exception. I don't say all of this to boost my ego. The problem is I am a hell of a worker who really does earn all the praise I get, but even then I can never seem to mesh with my co-workers.
Is there something yall do differently?
AardvarkGoodSwimmer
Veteran
Joined: 26 Apr 2009
Age: 61
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,665
Location: Houston, Texas
I think the main issue is that for NTs, five years is an eternity and they simply don't give a damn what happens five years down the road. (Of course, no such thing as a 'normal' person anyway. Some people care, but a distinct minority.)
I'll try and include a link to my post about H&R Block. They don't disclose third-party bank cross-collection. As you can probably tell by the way it sounds, yeah, that's the kind of thing you really need to disclose to your clients.
"H&R Block, bank products, cross-collection, unethical wo"
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt114422.html
AardvarkGoodSwimmer
Veteran
Joined: 26 Apr 2009
Age: 61
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,665
Location: Houston, Texas
It always seems to be this way. I really don't try to brown nose to leadership, but always seems like they love me (mainly because of those aspie quirks that make a great employee) and my co-workers hate me. One of my current cohorts has my back and tells anyone talking about me, "so what he is quiet and stand-offish, he has a hell of a work ethic and he still tries to help others." He is the exception. . .
A little bit, you might be showing off. And that may not be the best move to make. And like me, you might also have a rock star version of promotion, which is rare.
You exert informal leadership which is good. One thing, consider starting your own business (even though, straight up, 80% of new businesses fail.) And maybe the idea, you can't lead from 3 miles down the road. You can't be that much more visibly ahead of your co-workers and still be a builder and low-key leader. Or the percentages are lower. The more percentage move might be to hold back a little.
I'm glad that one guy stands up for you. As I'm sure you know, that is relatively rare. He just sounds more mature than average.
And, by the way, Welcome to Wrong Planet!
I don't think he's showing off. Making sure you do a good job and do whatever is required is not showing off, it's simply being a good employee! This will get you success in the end, I would think, simply because you will be able to move into a higher level job where your co-workers are hopefully more mature, and have a better work ethic simply because they worked for a long time to be where they are. So keep up the good work, an hard as it is, try not to let the others get you down.
_________________
A friend's book http://aspergerssociety.org/
Asperger's Poem I like http://www.aspergerssociety.org/articles/18.htm
Have AS, hoping to find community
I have similar issues at work. I've been there only a few months and am already one of management's favorites (if you're the one they call when they're having difficulty with their work, it's pretty obvious).
But I make a point of being extra friendly to my coworkers (one time, I said "Hi" and almost made eye contact!), and (more importantly) talking them up to the supervisors. It'll usually make it back to them that you did so, and do wonders for your popularity. Sure it's a lot of effort, but less than if I had the adversarial relationship with them that I've had at a lot of other jobs.
_________________
If life's not beautiful without the pain,
well I'd just rather never ever even see beauty again.
Well as life gets longer, awful feels softer.
And it feels pretty soft to me.
Modest Mouse - The View
I do find I pick things up quicker than most and am more ethical (honest) than most and this can tend to cause conflict. I find I have to keep my head down as much as possible, and work very hard at playing up and complimenting my colleagues strengths while downplaying my own. This doesn't usually backfire. If I'm really not happy somewhere I move on.
That having been said, I have never really been in a job that I feel was really consistent with my intellectual potential or really fulfilled me and haven't yet returned to work since having a major breakdown a couple of years ago so I definitely do have some unresolved issues regarding the world of work.
I like the different viewpoints.
I guess maybe the best I can hope for is being my current supervision will leverage me enough to attract attention to me a higher level. Luckily, I work for a top 50 company in the Fortune 500 so their is more than enough room for growth.
Thank ya'll again, its always nice to know your not alone in the NT world.
It's funny that this came up when it did.
My supervisor just asked me to take over for him while he takes a little time off, leaving me in charge of guys averaging 10 years older than me who've all been there a lot longer. It's great to know he thinks so highly of me, but I'm nervous about how it's going to go over with the others.
Plus he's way overqualified for his job, and has made no secret (to me, probably not to his superiors) of the fact that he's looking for other work. This makes me think that the next few days might be a test to see if I can move up into his job when he leaves.
Okay okay, you caught me. I just wanted to brag, but it's 4:00 in the morning and everyone I know in real life is still asleep and I didn't think this needed its own thread.
_________________
If life's not beautiful without the pain,
well I'd just rather never ever even see beauty again.
Well as life gets longer, awful feels softer.
And it feels pretty soft to me.
Modest Mouse - The View
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