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Cyraq
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24 Sep 2006, 5:03 am

Hi,

i'm a 15 year old teen, who was sure he had asperger's ever since reading an article on wikipedia more than a year ago. a week ago, i told my mom what is asperger's and that i would like to take a test at a center. she accepted and two days ago i went and had my test, which classified a high probability of me having asperger's.

i thought this would explain to my mom my unintended social behavior, and that it would explain to her that i am not being the result of "bad parenting", but more of a non-understanding of social life, and some differences in perception. however, this completely backfired. since then my mom scowls each time i mention asperger's, scolds me even more, and shouts that she is unconvinced that i have asperger's and that i'm using it as an excuse for my odd social behavior, and other differences.

sometimes i want to literally slap her for being so stupid and not understanding, but at other times i feel that she is in denial about her son having asperger's. please help me solve this problem.



hyper_alien
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24 Sep 2006, 5:04 am

Hi and welcome to WP.

aliens of the chat here


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MrMark
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24 Sep 2006, 5:37 am

I don't feel you have a "problem" to be "solved." You can't change your mother anymore than she can change you. In time, she may accept your condition. In the meantime, you'll have to accept her denial.


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superfantastic
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24 Sep 2006, 10:33 am

"Don't Mourn For Us":

http://ani.autistics.org/dont_mourn.html

Is there any chance that you can get her to read that?

Well, anyway, I applaud you for having the guts to tell her. I couldn't bring it up for my life.



jammie
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24 Sep 2006, 10:38 am

yeah, well done for telling her,

hopefully she will be more excepeting in a bit of time, finign out at 15 also might have somthing to do with it, my parent had the issue raised with them from when i was about 8 and they were still not always that acceptoing, infact due to one of my more unusual obbsessionf i stopped living with them when i was 13.

its seems somtime parents would rather that you were evil than what they see as broken.

^licks^

jammie & lion


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superfantastic
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24 Sep 2006, 10:48 am

[quote="jammie"]its seems somtime parents would rather that you were evil than what they see as broken.[quote]

Yeah because if you were evil you could always "change back", and maybe they feel it's their fault if you're broken but if you're evil, there's nothing they could have done about it (actually it's probably parents' fault if you're evil, but whatever).



solid
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25 Sep 2006, 7:35 am

hello, hav u gt msn or anything bcuse id like 2 speak 2 u


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Namiko
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03 Oct 2006, 8:53 pm

As a fictional character of mine once remarked, "Welcome to my world. Enjoy your stay." I wish I had advice to give you, but the only thing I can really offer is that you aren't the only one.

Read the article that superfantastic posted a link to and try to get your mom to do the same. A lot of parents have a difficult time accepting that their kid could be something other than "normal". Most parents don't like to see their kids struggle with stuff and for some reason or another (don't ask me why this is), they see anything that may be either wrong or different about their kids to be a reflection on them as parents.

In time, she'll probably come to accept the fact that you have AS, but do remember that this news is rather shocking at first and can take awhile to mull over and even begin to accept. In the meantime, you'll just have to accept the fact that she's having a difficult time dealing with it.

Also, it probably isn't a bad idea trying to find another trusted adult to talk to about this. It could be a teacher from school, a family friend, a neighbour or a counselor or anyone who is willing to listen and help make suggestions if you're having problems with something specific.

Hope this helps.


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