Any successful love stories of an Aspiegirl and NT???

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Happy Valentine's Day everyone!! ! Just wondering if there are any Aspiegirls in a good relationship with a NT?? I have been with a NT 2 years now, things are great but I wonder if things will be difficult in the future if we move in together. Just wondering how I will manage living with someone and living independently.

Would appreciate your advice

I've been married to an NT for 25 years next month, and we have four NT kids and a grandbaby. It's just like any other relationship, give and take, compromise and understanding. I also wasn't dx'd until a few years ago.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

Over 2 years with my lovely NT boy. Living together is easy, because he works a lot so I can get the space I need. (:

I was with an NT for 5.5 years during my 20s and we lived together for a couple of years. Then I moved out...I needed more space.

It is important to talk to them constantly about how you feel or don't feel because they seem to frequently forget that we think differently.

He and I broke up but remain wonderful friends.

I'll let you know how it turns out.

I'm an aspie dating an NT and while it's been almost 7 months, I feel so happy. I honestly believe that we can make it all the way, hopefully I'm proven right.

None here.

My hubby is NT, but he does have some AS traits and some traits often found associated with ASDs (but not prerequisite for a diagnosis). He perhaps has more traits than he's aware of (I don't even think he realises that he monologues a lot), but he copes well because he doesn't even notice the reactions of others and doesn't really care either (although he is a lovely person). We've been together since I was 16 and he was 21 and we've been married for 17 years. We have a great relationship and have very similar likes. I must drive him crazy at times, but he's good at hiding it. This isn't always helpful and I've told him he needs to tell me what's up, otherwise I know he's in a mood, but don't know why. He's very helpful around the home and with the care of our daughter, which is quite unusual, according to what I hear from other mums. He's not interested in TV sports or going out with the lads (we always go out as a couple or as a family and he wouldn't have it any other way). He's not 'romantic' (never even mentioned Valentine's), but I don't care about that sort of thing anyway. There's absolutely no doubt in my mind that he loves me and I trust him completely. I don't think I could live with a regular guy.

Congrats everyone and thanks for the advice

Living with a completely NT person and having a relationship with a NT is very difficult, but if it is the right person then everything works out well.

I am a diagnosed Aspie and also have schizoaffective disorder. Along with the occasional meltdowns and shutdowns I also experience psychosis and mania to a certain degree that is hard to get out of.
I have been together with my current boyfriend for 7 months now, knowing him as a friend for much longer. We've been living together for 3 months. When we were friends and were just dating, he noticed that I am behaving oddly sometimes but didn't put much thought to it. He knew that I am autistic and was joking that I "can not compute" a lot of times and experience "errors"... but he was always very patient and didn't care if I had speech problems and had a lot of pauses in my speech or didn't always maintain eye contact.

My stimming scared him quite often however, he considered it freaky and scary, but always calmed me down whatsoever. The real difficulties started when we moved in together and I would screw up a lot of his plans unintentionally.... And would then start panicking even more because I understood that I hurt his feelings unintentionally and couldn't do anything about it, and then my meltdowns worsened. Also there are so many issues with sensory problems. He is a musician and a DJ and constantly plays music, but music is the only distracting factor for when I am studying, and we had to make lots of changes regarding that, etc. Clothes/smells/food and especially spontaneity is also an issue.

I have a hard time understanding even such things as to where exactly certain trash goes (just a random example) or other "easy" things like that, I understand it theoretically, but practically I'm of no use because I daze off into my own world and then of course it can piss him off because I will do something in a completely different way and wouldn't even pay attention to it

However, we share mutual love for each other which developed over time, he says that "I'm special" even if it causes difficulties in our relationship, that I'm very kind and well-meaning, and I must say if I really care for someone I will notice some very important things about that person over time which in turn will make that NT person very happy. He enjoys that I "surprise" him all the time with my new interests, and he ALWAYS listens to me when I lecture him on Physics, he even asks questions and actually cares about learning something about my topic of interest. He thinks that I am a "wonderful human being" and that I inspire him a lot. I think this is what matters. Relationships with NT's are possible if they truly want to understand you and enjoy listening about your special interests etc (which is vital to me). All I need for relatively strong feelings is understanding and nourishment from my partner and intellectual interests/ideas...

He started reading up on Asperger's only recently and now he understands me much better. He actually wants to learn and wishes to help and understand because he truly loves me and that is what matters. He understands even why do I have "errors" during communication sometimes and explains a lot of things to me now. He also understands that because of my social problems I can mean well but say something offensive; and he knows exactly when I do that, which is really amazing and a very big positive sign for me.

All things aside, I still need to be alone sometimes because of sensory overload from just having him around and that might be the most difficult aspect in a relationship whatsoever...

My NT boyfriend and I have been together 3 years. It was long-distance for about 2 1/2 years, and I was pretty comfortable with that. Sometimes it was harder to be with him on the weekends we spent together because it would be 48 straight hours of him never leaving my side.

When I lost my house we went from long-distance to living together. It's been 5 months and it's mostly okay. Before I even started talking to him about the possibility of me being an aspie (I'm undiagnosed and high-functioning, but definitely on the spectrum) he was aware of my issues with crowds and sensory over-load. the few times I tried to do party-type things with him it ended badly and he just grew to accept that I wasn't going to do social things with him. He goes out a lot and I get a nice quiet evening at home with the cats, and we're both happy.

Living with him is what triggered my need to explore the possibility that I am *not* NT. I lived alone for 7 years so many aspects of my personality were no big deal to me, but he noticed them and was concerned. I also talk more now, and am exposed to other people more often. It has kind of opened my eyes, and I realized that I, you know, am not very normal at all.

We think we are doing well. Communication is key and we talk about our feelings all the time. There has been much discussion of an engagement lately, but he wants to wait until we've been living together for a year.

It will be 2 years in June and it is going great. It was tough in the beginning, after the "honeymoon phase," around when we started spending about everyday together. My feelings were torn between needing my own space and wanting to be around him. He's very talkative and would sometimes interrupt me and that can be too much stress on my brain. I also went through a phase where I was very down on myself for not being more like him: comfortable socially and able to make connections with people easily. Like most relationships that work out we have learned a rhythm that works for both of us.

He is a mathematician and a musician btw, and while he's very adept socially he doesn't seek out social interaction like many NTs do. He's perfectly happy by himself or with me. And I'm the same. We have a lot of similarities in our worldviews and emotionally we are both sensitive people. He's definitely the right one for me and I got super lucky, as he is my first boyfriend and I didn't find him until I was 26. As others said before me, there's no reason it can't work with the right person. And personally I think this is an advantage, because so many NTs are with the totally wrong people for shallow reasons but for us I think because of our uniqueness we have to seek out only the best

I am usually with guys considered NT, but I see some AS traits in them. The ones who don't have any usually don't feel right to me. I accept the AS traits but they can cause problems for me (us). So I have problems in both cases. It's better if they are aware and willing to discuss and learn about my traits. Mostly they aren't willing or just don't understand. (Their understanding is superficial.)

My first boyfriend was on the spectrum, by chance, and it was honestly a very unhealthy relationship. We were both insecure and codependent and fed off of each other's neuroses, and he was obsessed with video games to the point where we barely left the house. I've not dated an autistic since then, though all the men I've been with have certainly had their quirks.

My current partner is the most 'normal' of them all, a kind and gentle man with a genuine soul and a penchant for swing music. We've been together a year now and it's been nothing but a pleasure. He's aware of my condition and is very supportive when I need him to be, but most of the time it isn't something that needs to be brought up. The only issue is that he's sometimes very late to our meetings or forgets them all together without constant prodding, and as somebody who likes to be punctual and on schedule, this can really stress me out.
On the bright side, his extroversion really helps to get me out there and practice my social skills regularly, and his social circle is just and warm and welcoming as he is. There's always a party or other gathering to attend on the weekends. More than anything I don't think I could ever date an introvert again, as it does nothing but feed into my anxiety.

I've never had a boyfriend. Sometimes I wish someone would look at me as something mildly special. My experience has been that NT men usually don't want to be around a girl that's 'defective'. It messes with their sense of ego.

It's good to see that other people's experiences haven't always been like mine.